Bemoaned Jokes
4 bemoaned jokes and hilarious bemoaned puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bemoaned that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Bemoaned Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good bemoaned joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team.
I blame the general manager, said the first fan. If he signed better players, we'd be a great team.
I blame the players, said the second fan. If they made more of an effort, we'd score some points.
I blame my parents, said the third. If I'd been born in Seattle, I'd be supporting a decent team.
A Monkey could Do It
I was out to dinner with a friend of mine, bemoaning my lowly IT job when I spoke into the stillness of a moment, "You know ... a monkey in a suit could do my job and no one would notice."
He paused for a moment and then put a consoling hand on my shoulder. "Come on man ... we both know that monkey wouldn't have to wear a suit."
Two hungry hobos
Two hobos were walking along the railroad tracks bemoaning how long it had been since either one had eaten. They come across a racoon that had been half squished by a train, and one exclaims "Our luck has changed, we can split it!"
The second hobo demurred, "No thanks, I'm going to wait for a hot meal."
"Hot meal? You're nuts, I'm chowing down on this here rail kill," and proceeds scoop up and devour what was left of the racoon.
About 20 minutes later, the first hobo's stomach began to churn and rumble. "Oh, I think I'm going to be sick...."
The second one rubs his hands in delight, "Alright alright alright, here comes my hot meal!"
Isaac Newton, being the big p**... Mack daddy he is, goes to the bar.
There, he sees his good friend Rene DesCartes wallowing in self pity, crying over a whiskey.
"My dear friend," Newton says, "whatever is the matter?"
"Ah, Isaac, tis terrible! My wife has been cheating on me!" DesCartes bemoans, "We are separating and I fear I shall never love again!"
"Nonsense!" says Newton, "Join me and we shall go have a romp at the brothel! Surely some woman of ill repute will catch your fancy!"
DesCartes considers, but returns to his drink; "Sorry my dear friend, but I cannot find the passion within me. Will you stay here and keep me company?"
Newton sighs, knowing that his night is ruined, but knowing his friend is in need. "Of course I shall stay my friend; sometimes you need to put DesCartes before the w**...."
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