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Belong Jokes

100 belong jokes and hilarious belong puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about belong that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Belong Short Jokes

Short belong jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The belong humour may include short deserve jokes also.

  1. I love putting on warm underwear fresh out of the dryer... Plus it's super fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.
  2. I got fired from my job at the library... Apparently the book on women's rights doesn't belong in the fiction section.
  3. A crab, a tuna, a lobster, and a Chinese man being run over by a steam roller. What doesn't belong? The Tuna, since all of the others are crushedasians.
  4. Women are like hand grenades If you take off the ring you lose your house and half your belongings
  5. I really hate men that says women belongs in the kitchen How are they then supposed to clean the rest of the house?
  6. Why do the Russians put Z on all their military vehicles? Because sooner or later they will all belong to Zelensky
  7. I rescued a dog that belonged to a blacksmith. As soon as I brought it home, it made a bolt for the door
  8. I bought a shirt and some neckwear from Ebay that used to belong to the guy from the Mamas & the Papas All the sleeves are brown and the tie is gray
  9. What's a pirate's favourite letter? You'd think it'd be R, but 'tis the C his heart truely belongs to.
  10. My grandpa returned from the war with one leg. We still don't know to whom that leg belonged.

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Belong One Liners

Which belong one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with belong? I can suggest the ones about behave and contribute.

  1. 99.99% of people are idiots I'm just happy I belong to the 1%
  2. Women have eggs and milk in them... And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
  3. 99.9% of people are idiots. Fortunately, I belong to the 1% of intelligent people
  4. 99.9% of people are dumb Fortunately, I belong to 1% of smart people
  5. What do you call men who make "women belong in the kitchen" jokes? Single.
  6. I've got my own private jet... ...but the rest of the jacuzzi belongs to my mom.
  7. Does Forrest gump belong to Gen X, Gen Y, or Gen Z? Nope. He belongs to Gen A.
  8. I have my own private jet. The rest of the jaccuzi belongs to my roommate.
  9. 99.9% of the population is dumb. Fortunately I belong to the 1% of smart people.
  10. What trees belong in a bathroom? Well toiletries of course
  11. I know every single phone number I just don't know who they belong to
  12. What generation does Forrest Gump belong to? Gen A
  13. I belong to a family of failed magicians... I've got two half-sisters.
  14. To what branch of the military to babies belong? The infantry.
  15. Go back to Party City, where you belong!

Women Belong In The Kitchen Jokes

Here is a list of funny women belong in the kitchen jokes and even better women belong in the kitchen puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • The idea that women only belong in the kitchen is dated and offensive. The rest of the house needs cleaned too
  • Women belong in the kitchen. Men belong in the Kitchen.
    Everyone belongs in the kitchen.
    Kitchen has food.
  • All those men who think that women belong in the kitchen, Have no idea what to do with them in the bedroom.
Belong joke, All those men who think that women belong in the kitchen,

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about belong can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of belong puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Hilarious Fun Belong Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter

What funny jokes about belong you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean remaining jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make belong prank.

Which one doesn't belong: eggs, your wife, or a b**...?

The b**.... You can beat your eggs and your wife but you can't beat a b**....

k**... Pastor

An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux k**....
This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who said this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family."

No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression." Again, all was quiet.

Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop a runaway train rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, "Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux k**.... I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets."

A man walks into a mental hospital wearing nothing but plastic wrap.

The clerk says to him, "You definitely belong here, I can clearly see your nuts!"

Cheese Jokes

Q:What type of cheese do you use if you need to hide a horse?
A: Mascarpone
Q:What type of cheese do you use to make a Polar Bear come to you?
A:Camembert
Q: What type of cheese is made backwards?
A: Edam
Q:What type of cheese doesnt belong to you?
A: Nacho Cheese

The Polish farmer

During WW2, a team of German and Soviet surveyors went through Poland to split the country.
One day they found a farm placed directly over the planned border. The surveyors agreed that the border couldn't be drawn through the house, and decided to ask the farmer.
- Do you want to belong to Soviet or Germany?, they asked him.
After some thinking, the farmer answered
- I'd like to belong to Germany.
- Why is that?
- Oh - I've heard the Russian winters are very cold

I got two front teeth for Christmas!

I have no idea who they belong to.

p**...

Teacher: Describe hydrogen Student: It is a p**... element
Teacher: Who taught you that?
Student: You said it does not belong to a particular group and it reacts with almost all the elements in the periodic table.

Roses are Red - Good poem for your ex's

Roses are red.
Your blood is too.
You look like a monkey
And belong in a zoo.
Do not worry,
I'll be there too.
Not in the cage,
But laughing at you.

I think my washing machine used to belong to Usain Bolt.

It has a setting for fast coloureds.

What has one "n", two "g"s, an "i", "e", and an "r" and you can only say this word when you belong to this group?

ginger

An American mistakes a Hindu from India as a Muslim from Pakistan

Indian guy goes "Excuse me sir, you seem to have mistaken me for a Muslim from Pakistan. I belong to 711 not 911."
I will show myself out.

Sometimes I feel like a semi-colon

I don't know where I belong ;

What belongs to me but is used the most by others?

My ex-wife

Which of these three does not belong: (A) a lobster, (B) a flounder, or (C) a Korean man who has just been run over by a bus?

The answer is (B) a flounder.
The other two are crushedAsians.

There are 5 white guys waiting in the waiting room while their wives are delivering babies

The nurse comes out with a black baby and asks, "Whose baby does this belong to?"
The men just look at each other dumbfounded until one man puts his hand up and says, "It's probably mine, my wife burns everything."

Divorce custody

A couples divorce proceedings are in progress, and the case of who gets custody of their 4 year old child gets raised.
The mother pleads her case: "I'm the mother, I carried her for 9 months so of course she should stay with me."
The father responds: "if I go to an ATM machine, and I insert my card, and money comes out, does the money belong to me or to the machine?"

Why is my girlfriend like a deep fat fryer?

They're both dangerously hot and belong in the kitchen.

Which of the following does not belong: a) Gordon Lightfoot b) Helen Reddy c) Donald Trump d) Celine Dion

b) Helen Reddy is not associated with a sinking ship.

I can never figure out where I belong in the navy...

Oops, wrong sub!

Women belong in the house...

...and the senate too

During a custody battle...

A mother and father are sitting with a judge during a custody battle
Mom: Sir, I went through hours of pain and suffering to bring my daughter into this world. I should have full custody.
Judge: Do you have anything to say in your defense?
Father: When you put money into a vending machine and a Coke comes out, who does the coke belong to. You or the vending machine?

Which one is different from the other three and why - a fridge, a washing machine, a tv or a woman?

Most people say it's the tv because it's the only one that doesn't belong in the kitchen but they are sexist. It's the tv because it's the only one that doesn't leak when it's fudked.

Me and my friend robbed a chemical plant last night.

We stole all their Alkaline.
Now all their base are belong to us.

There are those who know the difference between "latter" and "former," and there are those who do not.

Proud to say I belong to the latter group.

Dang girl are you the Cross of Coronado?

Because you belong in a museum ;)

So i got fired from my job at the library, today

Apparently the books about womens rights, do not belong at the fantasy department..

What family of animals do porpoises belong to?

No phocoenidae!

Three men are in a bar

Three men are in a bar, talking about the Red Sox. "I think they'll win it all this year," said the first man. "No way, the Yankees are too good", said the second man. "Well, I've converted to several versions of Christianity and still belong to all of them!" declared the third man, before walking off.
"That was a strange guy," said the first man. "No," said the second man, "that was just a non-sect-quitter."

What do you call a noodle that doesn't belong?

An impasta ;)

I adopted a dog who used to belong to a blacksmith

I know he used to belong to a blacksmith because as soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the door.

An old mountaineer and his ex-wife...

were fighting over custody of their kids. The mother protested that since she brought her kids into this world, she should retain custody of them. The judge asked the old mountaineer for his side of the story. After a long moment of silence, the mountaineer rose from his chair and asked, "Judge, when I put a quarter in a candy machine and a candy bar comes out, does it belong to me or the machine?"

A city bus cleaner is hanging ads promoting martin luther king jr Day...

His co-worker shouts "Hey, those belong at the back of the bus!"

A man and a woman argue over the custody of their child...

The woman screams, "The child is mine! I birthed him from my own flesh and blood and carried him through labour! All you did was screw me, you don't deserve him!"
The man calmly replies, "Tell me, if I put ten cents in a vending machine and a drink pops out, does it belong to me or the vending machine?"

Funny Comeback

I go into McDonald's and there is this fat girl making fun of this mentally disabled kid*
Me: you know, that could happen to any of us. You don't belong making fun of someone like that, what's wrong with you?
Girl: god gave me a mouth to speak and I'm going to use it
Me: well god also gave you a mouth to eat, you abused that privilege.
Girl: -speechless-
Me: oh and you might want to wipe that ketchup off your chin
Girl: *goes to wipe chin*
Me: no, your other chin

Not my p**...

A wife goes on a retreat for work.
When she returns, she finds a pair of p**... in her dresser that do not belong to her.
Furious, she questions her husband.
The husband says, "I have no idea where they came from I don't do the laundry!"
So, the wife goes to the maid and questions her.
Indignant, the maid replies, "Madam, how should I know? These p**... don't belong to me. I don't even wear p**... just ask your husband!"

To anyone reading this, you are Important, you are loved, and you belong in this world

If you have over 5000 followers

a man catches another man climbing on his trees of vaginas.

"Hey" he yells " you don't belong here, get out of my cuntree"!!!

What is brown and does not belong in a healthy s**... relationship?

A hornet's nest.

Guns don't belong in the hands of the teachers, they belong in the hands of the thin blue line

That's right, the hall monitors. It's time we enforce the **real** rules, people.

I got a private jet.

Rest of the jacuzzi belong to my Dad.

My friend thinks I'm nuts. Says I belong in a padded room.

I said it couldn't hurt.

What do Jews and Cats have in common?

They both belong in the oven.

A man is jogging along the road when he find an absolutely pristine tennis ball on the ground.

It doesn't seem to belong to anyone. So he picks it up and puts it in his pocket.
While waiting at a cross walk another man notices the bulge and asks "What is that?"
"A tennis ball" he replies.
"Oh, that must hurt a lot! I once had a Tennis Elbow"

I am not a sexist but...

female mosquitos don't belong in a workplace. They the s**... the life right out of you.

I once went to a convention about impostor syndrome...

...but I had to leave because I felt like I didn't belong

A man was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him. The officer looked in the back of the man's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?

The man replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.
You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.
The next day, the officer saw the same guy driving down the road. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.
I did, the man replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach.

Why did a brother tell a sister to go sit in the middle of the highway?

Because that's where accidents belong.

A man named Jeff was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him.

The officer looked in the back of Jeff's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?

Jeff replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.

You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.

The next day, the officer saw Jeff driving down the road once again. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.

I did, Jeff replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach."

Why don't atheists pay taxes?

Because they belong to a non-prophet organization.

Do you know 99% of people are really dumb?

Luckily, I belong to the smart 5%.

Why won't you ever find Harry, Hermione or Ron crying in front of the rest of the school?

Cuz, they belong to the bravest house.
They don't cry publicly; they Grief-indoor.

Fact: Q is the only letter that isn't in any American state name.

And as such, believers in Q don't belong in America

We kidnapped your wife and are sending you her thumb. We'll kill her if you don't pay us 100000 USD.

The thumb can belong to anyone. Send her head instead.

A man goes to buy a clock.

He's browsing in the clock shop. Suddenly he hears a little voice "Get digital you probably can't read analogue."
Startled, he looks around. Nobody is there.
A few minutes later, he hears another little voice "Your shoes belong in a museum!"
He spins around. Noone there.
As he walks on, he hears another little voice "Your face looks like a baked potato."
He looks around but nobody is near him.
He storms over to the store manager.
"What's going on, who keeps insulting me?"
The manager apologises
"I'm sorry. It's the wind- up watches."

What Union do Professional Meme Artists belong to?

The Memesters

A man was taken to court by several people for spreading scandalous rumors about their s**... lives

The judge asked the man, "Do you have anything to say in your defense?"
"Well your honor," responded the man. "I grew up on a very small land mass in the ocean and its just a part of our culture."
Not satisfied, the judge asked, "What culture could you possibly belong to that would lead you to besmirch these good people's reputations?"
The man shrugged and responded, "Islander."
(this just came to me)

What's a pirates favorite letter?

In best pirate voice me hart will always belong to the CCCCcccc!!!

64% of the people are bad at math, according to a recent statistic

Lucky me, I belong to the other 46%

People who make counterfeit batteries....

Belong in cells

AIDS, h**..., s**..., and a timeshare. Which one doesn't belong?

s**.... You can get rid of that.

I love putting on warm underwear fresh out of the dryer.

Plus it's fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.

A wife goes on a retreat for work for a few days. When she returns and enters the house, she puts her things away and then goes to do some much needed laundry.

Upon her entry to the room, however, she finds a pair of p**... on the floor that do not belong to her!
Furious, she questions her husband.
The husband says, "I have no idea where they came from I don't do the laundry, the maid does!"
The wife calms down and says, "Oh! So maybe these belong to the maid, could be she was doing her laundry here."
"Nah," said the husband musingly, "she doesn't even wear p**....

I've memorized every number in the phone book

I just don't know who they belong to.

Belong joke, I bought a shirt and some neckwear from Ebay that used to belong to the guy from the Mamas & the Pap

jokes about belong

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these belong jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.