Beet Jokes
102 beet jokes and hilarious beet puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about beet that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Beet Short Jokes
Short beet jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The beet humour may include short beef jokes also.
- A struggling SoundCloud rapper decides to get a job as a farmer... He now produces his own beets
- What do you call an uncool beet? A square root
- Why don't the Beastie Boys juggle vegetables anymore? Because they kept making the beets... MMMMMM DROPPPPP
- What do you call Vegan Headphones? Beets.
- What's Dr.Dre's favourite vegetable? Beets
- Dr. Dre was arrested at a grocery store today. He dropped too many beets.
- What is something that's burried but you can still dance on it? A beet
- Why did the farmer have to supplement his income by DJing at night? because his Beets were sick
- What did the DJ say to the farmer? Lettuce, turnip, the beet.
I know, it was corny. - Why was the clumsy vegetable farmer a good dj? Because he dropped the beet.
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Beet One Liners
Which beet one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with beet? I can suggest the ones about bean and bees.
- Why did the rapper go to Whole Foods? He heard they had fresh beets.
- Why did the farmer fire the DJ? Because he kept on dropping beets.
- How do farmers get the party started? They turnip the beets.
- Why do bad farmers make good DJs? Because they've got sick beets!
- I failed as a farmer. I think I could be a musician. Look at all my sick beets.
- Why couldn't the radish finish the race? He was just a little beet.
- Why was Dr. Dre kicked out of the farmer's market? He kept dropping the beets.
- What is a vegetable's favorite joke? Beets me!
- Why did the farmer become a DJ? Because he had sick beets.
- What did the D.J. say to the Vegetable Farmer? Lettuce turnip the beet.
- What did the vegetables say at the garden party? Lettuce turnip the beet
- What did the garden say when he liked the music? LETTUCE. TURNIP. THE BEET!
- What do vegetarians say at a rave? Lettuce Turnip the Beet
- How do you make a salad wrap? By adding some beets
- What did the carrot say to the DJ? Lettuce Turnip The Beet
Cheerful Beet Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about beet you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean turnip jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make beet pranks.
I may be sweet like sugar,
but I'll still beet you with my cane!
What did the carrot say to the wheat?
Lettuce rest, I'm feeling beet.
Classic Music Joke for the ages
A chef was cooking some fresh beets on a REALLY dilapidated, old stove. The stove was hardly putting out any heat at all and he got so frustrated, he kicked the sorry appliance all the way
across the kitchen, shouting as he went.......... ROLL OVER BEET OVEN!!!
Beethoven
Beethoven dies and is buried. A few days after his burial the locals notice strange
music coming from the burial site. Alarmed, the villagers get the local priest and head
down to the graveyard. And sure enough the sound was coming from Beethoven's grave.
The locals watch as the priest places the side of his head onto the ground.
Deep in concentration he mutters: "Fifth symphony......fourth symphony....third...aha! Beethoven is decomposing!"
Beethoven walks into a bar...
The bartender tells him, "we don't serve any E-minors here."
Beethoven says "what?"
When you drop the beet...
...everybody's going to turnip
Beethoven asks his audience: "Is everyone ready to hear some symphonies!?"
The audience cheers as beethoven exclaims: "I can't hear you!"
Beethoven hyping the crowd.
Beethoven: YOU WANNA HEAR A SYMPHONY?
*crowd cheers*
Beethoven: I CAN'T HEAR YOU!
What did Michael Jackson say to the Vegetables?
Just beet it
When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard.
What was the vegan rock band's first hit?
Lettuce turnip the beet!
Beethoven is on the stage at a concert
"You wanna' hear a symphony?"
"Yeaaah"
"I can't hear you!"
Why didn't Beethoven sell his house?
He put it up Fur Elise!
Why did the vegetable band break up?
They couldn't keep the beet.
Why was Beethoven making a lot of money?
His property was Fur Elise
Why did Beethoven never answer the doorbell?
They weren't invented yet.
Did you know Beethoven wrote a song in order to pay his rent?
It was for a lease
Beethoven must've hated his music...
Sure he spent a lifetime composing, but so far he's spent centuries decomposing.
What did Beethoven the dog shed in a moment of genius?
Fur Elise
You know what they say. Once you go Beethoven....
You never go Bach
Why did the veggie band sound horrible live?
Because they were missing a beet.
did you hear about the clumsy musician who tried gardening?
he dropped the beet
Why was Beethoven unpopular with the ladies?
He finished in three movements.
Did you know that Beethoven had a brother?
Everyone called him Beethmicrowave
Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?
All they said was ,"Bach, Bach, Bach"
Never let anyone tell you what you can and can't do.
Take Beethoven for example, they told him he could not be a musician because he was deaf ... but he didn't listen.
My grandma won the local grocery store's anual dance competition.
She didn't miss a beet.
How do you introduce an exhausted red vegetable to a steak?
"Beat beet, meet meat."
Why couldn't Beethoven find his teacher?
Because he was Haydn
Why did Beethoven kill his chicken?
Because it kept saying "Bach".
United Airlines adds a new food item to their menu
Beet Salad
My friend has started a new diet consisting of nothing but root vegetables.
Personally, I've found it hard to beet.
Why couldn't Beethoven go to the dance?
He was too baroque.
I had a vegetarian girlfriend who was into b**....
She did not carrot all if I beet her.
Three vegetables walk into a club
Lettuce, turnip and beet.
How did Beethoven get to be so famous?
Some people just have mad scales.
How does Dwight Schrute keep himself entertained on the farm?
Beet boxing.
What do you call a vegetable that doesn't take care if it's children?
A dead beet dad
How does a beetle serenade his girlfriend?
He sings "I've got you under my chitin".
What is Beethoven doing now?
De-composing
After Beethoven died and they buried him, you could hear his symphonies from the grave in the descending order, first his symphony No. 9, then No. 8 etc.
He was just decomposing.
How would Beethoven react to Mettalica, if he's alive now?
Probably not much, since he's deaf
Beethoven to his audience:
Beethoven: Make some noise for the next symphony
Audience: YEAAAAAAAAA!!!
Beethoven: I can't hear you
If two vegetarians get in a fight. . .
Is it called a beet?
Honestly my parents would prefer I come out as gay rather than I come out as a vegan.
It's okay for a guy to beat my meat, but I'm not allowed to to buy a beet over meat.
What did the starving ethiopian rapper say?
Give me a fat beet!
Beethoven (to crowd): "Alright... are you guys READY FOR SOME SYMPHONIES?"
Crowd: (*Cheers*)
Beethoven: "I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"
Beethoven was a good composer, but let's not get carried away.
After all, he may have spent 44 years composing, but now he's on 191 years of decomposing.
What did Beethoven say to his hairy piano playing dog, Lise?
"Come here, furry Lise."
What is Beethoven doing in his grave?
Decomposing.
Never let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do.
Just look at Beethoven. Everyone told him he couldn't be a mucisian, but did he listen?
What would Beethoven be doing if he were alive today?
Decomposing
Beet juice
Did h**... beet juice?
What did Beethoven say when it was discovered that he was not actually deaf, and just wearing airpods?
"It smells like baroque in here."
What do Beethoven and the hiphop artist Lil'Jon have in common?
What?!
When Beethoven started composing music, people said he wouldn't amount to anything because he was deaf
Fortunately, he didn't listen to the critics
A beetle was happily eating a cucumber, but then the cucumber suddenly was immersed in vinegar
As the beetle started to burn it thought, *"Uh oh, now I'm really in a pickle."*
What's Beethoven doing now?
Decomposing.
What are Beethoven and Mozart?
Decomposed Composers
When Beethoven went deaf, his friends told him to give up composing
He didn't listen.
What is Beethoven doing in his coffin?
De-composing
Why was Beethoven always sad?
Because he never heard anyone give their appreciation for his compositions.
At a Beethoven concert --
Beethoven: You guys ready for some music?
Crowd: YES!
Beethoven: I can't hear you...
What is Beethoven doing right now?
Decomposing.
Beethoven was told he wouldn't he able to make music. But did he listen?
No
What did Beethoven do after he died?
He decomposed.
Why did Beethoven go to the car dealership?
For a lease
Why did Beethoven kill all his chickens?
Because they kept going Bach Bach Bach.
Never let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do
Just look at Beethoven, everyone told him he would never be a musician, just because he was deaf. But did he listen?
What did the shirt say to the pants?
What up britches!
(At a photography studio today, taking an extended family picture with like 15 people there. This is what the photographer said to get us to smile. I couldn't stop laughing, and was beet red. We had to wait for me to calm down. I'm a middle age married man with teenage kids , it was great fun seeing my girls roll their eyes at dad, that couldn't stop laughing at a dumb joke.)
How did Beethoven rent out his house?
He put it up Fur Elise
These Farmers got arrested!
Did you hear why the celery farmer got arrested?
For stalking
Did you hear about the hay farmer that got arrested?
He's out on bail
Did you hear about the root vegetable farmer that got arrested?
He beet up his friend with a potato and didn't carrot all.
