Bedtime Story Jokes
10 bedtime story jokes and hilarious bedtime story puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bedtime story that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Bedtime Story Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good bedtime story joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
When I was young, at bedtimes...
My mum used to tell me fairy stories with a happy ending. Just one of the benefits of having a masseuse as a parent I guess.
Why Floyd Mayweather can't get his daughter to go to bed
Floyd's daughter: Hey Daddy, can i stay up and watch TV?
floyd mayweather: No it's past your bedtime and you're suppose to go to sleep
Floyd's daughter: Well can you at least read me a bedtime story until i fall asleep?
Floyd Mayweather: Fine you can watch TV as long as you want
Mrs. Patel was reading little Rajinder a bedtime story. He asked, "what will I be when I grow up?" She replied, "you can be anything you want to be."
"Anything?" he asked.
"Yes, you can be anything you want to be. You can be a cardiologist, radiologist, anesthesiologist, neurologist...."
My friend asked if I could help him write a bedtime story for his kids.
I thought "what a novel idea".
A man asked a scholar if it is okay to scratch your hand while in pilgrimage...
Hey guys, it is bedtime now and am pretty depressed after a long bad day. Remembering this story-found in Arabic literature-made me chuckle so I hope it will brighten your day too.
A man asked a scholar if it is okay to scratch own arm while in pilgrimage?
The scholar: yes, you can.
Man: to what extent?
The scholar: until you see the bones!!!
My girlfriend wanted me to read her a bedtime story
Jokes on her, every story is a Bedtime Story when you're in a coma.
How do you start a Mexican bedtime story?
Juans upon a time.
My favorite bedtime story...
...is the one where the cow jumps over the place where little boy blue is blowing the man on the moon.
A father regularly tells bedtime stories for his son
One day, the son asks the father if he could finally choose the book he wanted his father to read for him. The father reluctantly agreed and the son points to a book with a clock on the cover. The father immediately puts away the book, saying that he was saving it for later on.
Months pass when finally, the father retrieves the book. The son questions the father about why he has decided to bring it out now and the father responds, "it's *about time*".
Display of courage in House of Leaves.
From "Tom's Story", *House of Leaves*:
I call this "A Little Bedtime Story For Tom."
A long time ago, there was this captain and he was out sailing the high seas when one of his crew spotted a pirate ship on the horizon. Right before the battle began, the captain cried out, "Bring me my red shirt!" It was a long fight but in the end the captain and his crew were victorious.
The next day three pirate ships appeared. Once again the captain cried out, "Bring me my red shirt!" and once again the captain and his men defeated the pirates. That evening everyone was sitting around, resting, and taking care of their wounds, when an ensign asked the captain why he always put on his red shirt before battle. The captain calmly replied, "I wear the red shirt so that if I'm wounded, no one will see the blood. That way everyone will continue to fight on unafraid." All the men were moved by this great display of courage.
Well the next day, ten pirate ships were spotted. The men turned to their captain and waited for him to give his usual command. Calm as ever, the captain cried out, "Bring me my brown pants."
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