Beauty Contest Jokes
25 beauty contest jokes and hilarious beauty contest puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about beauty contest that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Beauty Contest Short Jokes
Short beauty contest jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The beauty contest humour may include short beauty pageant jokes also.
- Why were there only 49 contestants in the National Ebonics Beauty Pageant? Nobody wanted to wear the sash that says "Idaho".
- Hey baby, if you were in a beauty contest... You would come in second place.
Because Nobody looks better than you. - You hear what happened to the beauty pageant contestant that came out covered in beef cuts? she was ms. steak'n... and got grilled
- Why didn't the gymnast do so well in the beauty contest? she was Nastia Liukin than the other contestants.
- What do you call a girl who did not register in time for the beauty contest? Miss Deadline.
- A front end auto shop sponsored a beauty pageant to increase sales but it had the opposite effect when they started promoting their Miss Alignment Contest
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Beauty Contest One Liners
Which beauty contest one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with beauty contest? I can suggest the ones about pageant and staring contest.
- Who won the skeleton beauty contest? No body.
- Did you see the winner of the Ms Saudi Arabia beauty contest? Neither did I.
- Did you hear about the winner of the Alabama state beauty contest? Me neither.
- Did you hear about the Middle Eastern beauty contest? Me neither.
- My wife once came in second in a ginger beauty contest.
- Did you hear about the amputee snake that won a beauty contest? Its a pretty short tail
- How did the dog make $10 It won second prize in a beauty contest.
- Did you hear about the prize at the feline beauty contest? It was a cat-a**...-trophy
Witty Beauty Contest Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about beauty contest you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean beauty jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make beauty contest pranks.
Only cricket fans will appreciate
Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day.
As they walk, they come across a sign:
"Beauty contest to find the most beautiful woman in the world.."
"I am entering" said Snow White.
After half an hour she comes out and they ask her, "Well, how'd ya do?"
" First Place ," said Snow White
They continue walking and they see a sign:
"Contest to find the strongest man in the world.."
"I'm entering," says Superman.
After half an hour he returns and they ask him,
"How did you make out?""
First Place ," answers Superman. "Did you ever doubt it?"
They continue walking when they see a sign:
"Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?"
Pinocchio enters. After half an hour he returns with tears in his eyes...
"What happened?" they asked.
"Who the f--k is Chris Cairns?" asked Pinocchio.
Divine Frog
A family is driving in their car on holidays. A frog crosses the road and the husband, who is driving, is able to stop the car. He gets out and takes the frog and carries him to the side of the road.The frog is grateful, thanks the man and tells him that he will grant him a wish.The man says, "Please make my dog win the next dog race."The frog asks to look at the dog, which limps out of the car. The frog notices that the dog only has three legs, it very fat, and can barely move at all so he tells the man that he thinks it is almost impossible to fulfil his wish and asks that the man will tell him another wish.The man says, "Well, then please make my wife win the next beauty contest in the area. The frog asks him to tell his wife to get out of the car.Wife comes out of the car and approaches the frog.The frog turns to the man and says, "Could I please have another look at the dog?"
The ladder to success
A man was walking along the street when he saw a ladder going into the clouds. As any of us would do, he climbed the ladder. He reached a cloud, upon which sat a rather plump and very ugly woman. "Screw me or climb the ladder to success," she said.
No contest, thought the man, so he climbed the ladder to the next cloud. On this cloud was a slightly thinner woman, who was slightly easier on the eye. "Screw me hard or climb the ladder to success," she said. "Well," thought the man, "might as well carry on."
On the next cloud was an even more attractive lady who, this time, was quite attractive. "Screw me now or climb the ladder to success," she uttered. As he turned her down and went on up the ladder, the man thought to himself that this was getting better the further he went.
On the next cloud was an absolute beauty. Slim, attractive, the lot. "Screw me here and now or climb the ladder to success," she flirted. Unable to imagine what could be waiting, and being a gambling man, he decided to climb again. When he reached the next cloud, there was a 400 pound ugly man, arm pit hair showing, flies buzzing around his head.
"Who are you?" the man asked.
"Hello" said the ugly fat man, "I'm Cess!"