The Best 25 Bearded Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Bearded jokes. There are some bearded mohamed jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these bearded sideburns puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Bearded Jokes and Puns

A cruise ship passes by a remote island, and all the passengers see a bearded man running around and waving his arms wildly. "Captain," one of the passenger asks, "who is that man over there?"

"I have no idea," the captain says, "but he goes nuts every year when we pass him."

Jesus, Moses, and an old bearded guy are playing golf...

Moses steps up first and lands his ball in a water hazard. He then proceeds to part the water where the ball is and lands it in the hole.

Jesus hits his ball and also lands it in the water hazard. So he walk on the water, picks it up, places it on a nearby lily pad and also lands it in the hole.

Now the old bearded guy steps up and just hits the ball with all his strength. The ball goes flying! It then proceeds to hit a nearby rooftop, bounce along the grass and land on a lily pad. A frog appears and eats the golf ball. Then out of nowhere a bird picks up the frog in its talons and flies off. As the bird flies over the green, the frog spits out the ball and it manages to land the ball in the hole...

After witnessing this Moses turns towards Jesus and says, "I hate playing with your dad."

Cruise ship and the bearded man

From a passenger cruise ship, everyone can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting and desperately waving his hands.

"Who is it?" a passenger asks the captain.

"I have no idea. Every year when we pass, he goes nuts."

Bearded joke, Cruise ship and the bearded man

A bearded guy

A bearded, middle-eastern guy boards a plane. As soon as he enters he shouts "hijack!". All the passengers are scared to death. Some start crying. Then a white guy from the back stands up and says "oh hi Ahmed, didn't expect to see you here.."

I think something's wrong with my bearded dragon. :(

He's got a reptile dysfunction.


Thought of this in the car today...

A bearded man walks into a McDonald's without a shirt on. When he gets to the counter the cashier blurts out "I'm sorry sir, we can't serve you food unless you're wearing a shirt."

"What do you mean?" the man bellows incredulously as he brings his hand up to stroke his beard.

"I have a goatee!"

Whats a fedora clad, neck bearded gentlemen's favorite color?

M'genta

Bearded joke, Whats a fedora clad, neck bearded gentlemen's favorite color?

A cruise ship passed a tiny, isolated island.

Everyone on board could see a bearded man on the island, shouting and desperately waving his hands.

"Who is that man?" a passenger asked the ship's captain. "Why is he so upset?"

"I have no idea," said the Captain, "but every year when we pass by here, he goes nuts."

What do you call a bearded gardener?

Hairy Potter

A drunken bearded man is stumbling around outside a bar . . .

"I'm Jesus Christ! I am Jesus Christ!" He's yelling. No one bothers with him as he paces around waving his arms. Finally a man walks up, "I'm Jesus Christ" he yells at the man. "Ok" says the man "prove it and I'll give you 10 dollars." So the drunk nods and walks into the bar. "OH JESUS CHRIST!" Says the bartender, "not you again!"

What did the rich bearded slave owner say when he was stranded in the desert and saw a mirage of an Arabian lamp and rubbed it?

here in my mirage got this brand new labor genie here

You can explore bearded bald reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean bearded lustful dad jokes. There are also bearded puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I saw on the news Boy George's bearded dragon has attacked and bitten his housekeeper 6 times in the last month

I reckon he needs a calmer chameleon.

The Bearded Lady just rear-ended some Siamese Twins.

It was a freak accident.

Just punched an old bearded fat guy at the mall..

I passed infront of him and he happily looked at me and called me a "Ho" 3 times.

So rude!

What Do You Call a Bearded Man Whose Idea of Paradise is 72 Virgins?

Richard Branson.

A cruise ship is sailing in the Caribbean..

The cruise ship passes by a remote island, and all the passengers see a bearded man with an eyepatch running around and waving his arms wildly.

Captain, one passenger asks, who is that man over there?

I have no idea, the captain says, but he goes nuts every year when we pass him.

Bearded joke, A cruise ship is sailing in the Caribbean..

If a Bearded dragon shaves

would that make it just a normal dragon 🤔

My wife applied for the bearded woman circus attraction

I explained the position requires her to be a woman

There was a scientific study showing that bearded men are more attractive...

...than bearded women.


What did the heavily bearded guy ask Santa for Christmas?

A Chinchilla!

What did the villager say after the stampede of bearded antelopes ended?

No Gnus is Good News!

The police has been on the lookout for a large bearded man breaking into children's homes to give them treats.

At least that's what my parents told me whenever I didn't receive any gifts from Santa.

If a bearded man makes vases...

Is he a hairy potter?

What do you call someone who believes in a magical bearded sky fairy?

A religious liar.

To those bearded men in turbans who tried to convert me to your religion

You make me Sikh!

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the bearded arabian jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working bearded turban piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes