The Best 9 Bear And Rabbit Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Bear And Rabbit jokes. There are some bear and rabbit bearly jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these bear and rabbit baloo puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Bear And Rabbit Jokes and Puns

The Rabbit, The bear, and The genie.

A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit trips on a glistening metal object. The bear quickly picks up the object which appears to be a silver oil lamp.

A genie appeared forth.
The genie looked at the bear then the rabbit, then back at the bear.
"Alright, which of you schmucks freed me?"

"Me" the bear and rabbit said simultaneously.

The genie looked at the rabbit, then back at the bear. "Alright, I'm in a good mood, so you both get three wishes. Who's going first?"

The bear volunteered. "I wish all the other bears in this forest were female" He said.

"I wish I had a motorcycle" said the rabbit.

"Done and done" said the genie. Next wish?

The bear got a dumb smile and said "I wish all the other bears in the surrounding forests were female."

The rabbit hopped on the motorcycle. "I wish I was wearing a helmet"

"Alright. easy enough."

The bear a grin across his face yelled "I wish all the other bears in the world were female!"

The rabbit revved the engine, put on some goggles and as he sped away yelled "I wish the bear was gay!"

The CIA, MI5, and the KGB have a contest

The CIA, MI5, and the KGB have a contest to see who can find a white rabbit in the forest

The CIA comes in first place, finding the rabbit in fourteen hours. They used contacts, thermal vision, and satellites.

MI5 comes in second place, finding the rabbit in 24 hours using much of the same tactics

The KGB comes in last place. In one hour, they produced a bear, near beaten to death, who said "OK, OK, I admit it, I am a rabbit."

Three blondes are walking through the woods...

They come across a pair of tracks.

The first blonde says, "I think these are bear tracks!"

"No", the second blondes goes, "these are definitely deer tracks!"

The third blonde says, "I think they're rabbit tracks!!"

Then the train hit them...

This is my favorite clean joke by far.

The CIA, FBI, and the KGB are tasked with finding a rabbit in a forest...

The CIA show up after a few days and release a 6000 word article on the fact that rabbits don't exist.

The FBI show up with a dead rabbit and say in a press release "The rabbit had it coming."

The KGB show up with a bruised and beaten bear. The bear is forced to make a statement "I am a rabbit, my father was a rabbit, and my mother is a rabbit. My whole family are rabbits!" the bear disappears shortly after...

While wandering through the woods....

I came upon a rabbit who said he could jump over the moon. So I shot him. Then I happened upon a deer who said he was faster than the speed of light. So I shot him. Then a bear appeared and said he was in the Russian space program. So I shot him.

Remember, only you can prevent forest liars.


The CIA, KGB and MI6 decide to have a contest.

Each is given the task to find a rabbit
realeased in the woods.

The CIA uses spyplanes and satellites and finds the rabbit in 2 hours.

The MI6 deploys recon and search teams and finds it in 3 hours.

The KGB return after 1 hour with a badly beaten bear who cries out "I am the rabbit and I surrender".

Bear

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks do you have any problems with shit sticking to your fur and the rabbit says no . So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.

A bear is taking a shit in the woods, and sees a rabbit nearby, doing the same - so he strikes up a conversation

Bear - "Hello, Mr. Rabbit"

Rabbit - "Hello, Mr. Bear"

Bear - "Would you mind if I asked a personal question?"

Rabbit - "Why, no - go ahead"

Bear - "Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"

Rabbit - "No Mr. Bear, I do not."

So the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his ass with him.

A Rabbit and a Bear in the Woods

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says:
"Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"
The rabbit says: "no"
So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the bear and rabbit sideburns jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working bear and rabbit moustache piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes