Barefoot Jokes
42 barefoot jokes and hilarious barefoot puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about barefoot that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Read all the best Barefoot Jokes, now! From clever puns about footprints to hilarious gags about sneakers and boots, this collection of fun jokes is sure to amuse the Barefoot Contessa in all of us. Enjoy a good laugh!
Quick Jump To
Funniest Barefoot Short Jokes
Short barefoot jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The barefoot humour may include short bare feet jokes also.
- Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, was quite skinny, and apparently had bad breath. That'd make him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis
- Always helpful... Before I criticize a man, I walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he's a mile away and barefoot.
- It took Gandhi over a month to cross the Alps barefoot, no washing, worn out, and survived only on garlic. He was a... Super-calloused fragile mystic, extra halitosis.
- Have you heard about the barefoot frail wizard with bad breath? Well it's the first confirmed case of a super calloused fragile mystic hexed with halitosis
- Before you criticize a gunman you should walk a mile in his shoes. That way you'll be out of range and he'll be barefoot.
- While climbing barefoot up mountains to meditate, Ghandi would squeeze garlic into his mouth to deal with hunger pains from fasting super calloused fragile mystic with extra halitosis
- Since Ghandi walked barefoot, and ate a diet giving him bad breath, he was... A super Calloused Fragile Mystic Hexed by Halitosis!
- What do you call a Monk with osteoporosis who likes eating onions and walks everywhere barefoot He's a Super fragile calloused mystic plagued with halitosis.
- Abebe Bikila famously won the 1960 Olympic marathon while running barefoot. Do you think his opponents tasted defeet?
- What did the Jamaican say after winning the barefoot marathon? "Da trill of victory always betta dan de agony of de feet!"
Share These Barefoot Jokes With Friends
Barefoot One Liners
Which barefoot one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with barefoot? I can suggest the ones about footwear and happy feet.
- why do buddhists walk around barefoot its good for the sole
- What do you call a barefooted Japanese man? No sake
- Confucius say... Man who walks everyday barefoot will have a tough sole
- What kind of shoes do bears wear? None because they go barefoot.
- Why shouldn't you go barefoot in Nigeria? You might step on the Lagos.
- If clues were shoes, you'd go barefoot.
- What do you call a person who's barefoot?
- Confucius say... Walking barefoot toughens the soul
- No One Understands Me I'm a barefooter, so no one can walk a mile in my shoes.
- Did you hear the Barefoot Contessa stopped eating meat? Ina Garten's a vegan.
- What is a Barefooted Locksmith's favorite drink? Sake. (sock-key)
Cheeky Barefoot Jokes to Experience Good Cheer & Frivolity
What funny jokes about barefoot you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sandals jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make barefoot pranks.
Mahatma Gandhi was a strange person.
He walked barefoot everywhere, to the point that his feet became quite thick and hard. He often went on hunger strikes, and even when he wasn't on a hunger strike, he did not eat much and became quite thin and frail. He also was a very spiritual person. Finally, because he didn't eat much and when he did his diet was peculiar, he developed very smelly breath.
He eventually became known as a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
What nationality were Adam and Eve?
Soviet, of course. Who else would walk around barefoot and n**..., have one apple to share between them, and think they were in Paradise?
My dad's favorite. (Get the groan ready)
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet.
He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and...with his odd diet...he suffered from bad breath.
This made him...
...a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Thought I'd share a favorite on my cake day
Gandhi used to walk barefoot on most days, neglecting modern footwear, and eventually grew a strong set of callouses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather weak and with his odd diet, suffered from very, very bad breath. To others he smelled atrocious, this super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Gandhi...
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ....A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet.
He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Mahatma Gandhi...
...walked barefoot a lot, which probably produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. I've heard he also ate very little, which could have made him rather frail. The odd diet he kept leads me to believe he suffered from bad breath. I suppose you could have called him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
So Gandhi wandered the desert barefoot and had hard, worn feet...
He was very thin from fasting often, his followers considered him prophetic, and because of his fasting and strange diet had chronic bad breath.
In short, you could say he was a
Super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis
So we all know about Gandhi right?
Well Gandhi as well know was a very important person who in recent times has taken on a mystic quality to some. He often fasted for long periods of time making him rather weak and fragile, he went barefoot for long periods of time and so it's fair to assume he built up lots and lots of callouses and he was reported at one point to have very bad breath because of a gum disease. This all means he was a...
Super Calloused Fragile Mystic Hexed By Halitosis
What do we know about Gandhi?
Well, he walked barefoot and was a vegetarian.. he ate very little and practiced yoga, and was a minimalist who likely didn't brush his teeth either, giving him bad breath.
He was a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Gandhi, the first hippie
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Gandhi's diagnosis
Now Gandhi hardly ate a thing, his frame was rather frail
But then he'd eat the strangest foods, his breath was often stale
And he walked around barefoot, so this was his diagnosis:
Super calloused fragile mystic hexxed by halitosis.
Did you hear about the Shaman?
He chose to walk the world barefoot which caused he feet to blister a thousand times over.
He ate only bugs and berries that he found in nature which caused him to became very frail.
This diet also caused him to be plagued with horribly bad breath.
He was known as the Super Calloused Fragile Mystic Hexed by Halitosis.
Old monk
There once was a very old monk that tended to break his bones when he fell down. He always walked barefooted everywhere he went so his feet were more callouses than soft skin. No one talked to him very long because his breath was so bad it could wilt flowers. They called him Super-calloused-fragile-mystic-cursed-with-halitosis
The City Slicker and The Farmer
**City Slicker:** There sure are a lot of flies around here. Don't you ever shoo them?
**Farmer:** No. we just let them go barefoot.
****
^*From ^the ^epic ^fantasy ^adventure ^novel ^Silly ^Summertime ^Jokes*
Gandhi, as you know, would walk barefoot everywhere...
...and as a result he developed these massive callouses on his feet. He would also fast, from time to time. Because of this lack of food his bones became extremely brittle. It would also give him hallucinations from time to time. Finally, Gandhi never really had the time to clean his teeth and he became cursed with really bad breath.
In summary, Gandhi was a super-calloused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis.
GOD ENJOYS A GOOD LAUGH!
There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone brother.
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He didn't get a fair trial.
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father's business.
2. He lived at home until he was 33.
3. He was sure his Mother was a v**... and his Mother was sure He was God.
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:
1. He talked with His hands.
2. He had wine with His meals.
3. He used olive oil.
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:
1. He never cut His hair.
2. He walked around barefoot all the time.
3. He started a new religion.
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian:
1. He was at peace with nature.
2. He ate a lot of fish.
3. He talked about the Great Spirit.
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:
1. He never got married.
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.
But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:
1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was virtually no food.
2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it.
3. And even when He was dead; He had to get up because there was still work to do.
The Mystical Mahatma Gandhi
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. So I guess you could say he was a...
super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
