banjo Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious banjo puns

What do you call a beautiful woman on the arm of a banjo player?

A tattoo.

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What did the guitar and banjo name their daughter?

Amanda Lynn

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Stolen from the broken shower thread: hillbilly joke

Two hillbillies got married. On their wedding night, the hillbilly groom admitted that he was a virgin and didn't really know what to do.

The hillbilly bride, who was much experienced, just giggled and said, "Silly, you just take that thing you play with and put it where I pee." So he got up, grabbed his banjo and threw it in the sink.

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A banjo asked a fiddle to marry him. "Don't frett," he said. "Just duet and we'll live in harmony until the end of time."

Ten months later, the fiddle started to tip the scales. Her belly was noticeably bowed and before you could say concerto, out popped a minor.

Daddy banjo went to the Hyundai dealer and traded in his old Accent for a brand new Sonata. After just a month, mama fiddle lost her key at the bar and had a break down when she couldn't find it. Apparently it really struck a chord with daddy banjo because for the first time ever, he took a harsh tone with mama fiddle. He drove her home, lost his tempo, strung her up by the neck, and beat her.

Domestic violins.

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What did the banjo say to the worried guitar?

Don't fret

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A bagpipe player, a banjo player and an accordion player all walk into a bar...

everybody leaves.

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What's the difference between a guitar and a banjo?

A guitar can get you laid, whereas a banjo can get you laid with your sister.

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Why are banjos played more commonly down south?

Because you need 6 fingers to play it.

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Why did the banjo player get into heaven?

The devil has standards.

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What is the difference between an onion and a banjo?

No one gets tears in their eyes when you chop up a banjo.

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A banjo player returns home after a gig one evening...

Parking his car by his housing, he realizes he forgot to bring in with him his banjo from the backseat. He let's it go, thinking it'll probably be there in the morning still. Next morning he approaches his car, and notices that the rear window of his car has been smashed in! Uproared, he rushes to the car, and what does he find once he gets there? Two banjos in the backseat.

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What is the difference between a banjo and a trampoline?

You don't have to take your shoes off to jump on a banjo.

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There once was a farmer who's name was Rick

There once was a farmer who's name was Rick,

And he just loved to play with his...



Banjo, and the lady next door,

You could tell by just looking that she was a...



Fine, fine lady, she rolled in the grass,

And when she rolled over, you could see her bare...



Legs in the moonlight, she walked like a duck,

And she taught Rick the right way to...



Raise fine children, the girls learned to knit,

And the boys learned to shovel big piles of...



Hay and barley, this story goes well,

And if you don't like it, you can go straight to...



Bed.

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Do you know why there are no banjos in Star Trek?

Because it's the future... Duh!

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Why did the chicken play the banjo?

He was clucking around.

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What does a banjo sound like when it's completely in tune?

No one really knows.

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What do you throw to a drowning banjo player?

His mandolin.

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TIL: The guy who invented the toothbrush plays banjo in his spare time.

Anyone else would have called it a teethbrush.

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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

Throwing a banjo into a dumpster and hitting an accordion with it.

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What are the most funny Banjo jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Banjo? Well, here are the best Banjo dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Banjo pick up lines to share with friends.

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