The Best 17 Bandit Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Bandit jokes. There are some bandit thefts jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these bandit musket puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Bandit Jokes and Puns

A bounty hunter rides into town with a completely sealed box.

He goes up the the mayor, holds up the bounty, and says, I've got your bandit just as you requested 'dead and alive'.

The mayor says, not 'dead AND alive', 'dead OR alive'.

The bounty hunter looks at the bounty and then at the box and then at the mayor, and says, I guess we should open the box then.

What did the German bandit say when he was finally apprehended by Peralta?

Nein nein!

What do you call a sexually repressed bandit?

Rubbin' Hood

Bandit joke, What do you call a sexually repressed bandit?

What does an organ stealing bandit say?

Stand and de-liver!

Did you hear about the bandit that stole a truck of soap?

Police say he made a clean getaway.


What did the Mexican say to the great cheddar bandit?

That's nacho cheese.

What do you call a robber who looks like David Beckham?

Bandit like Beckham

Bandit joke, What do you call a robber who looks like David Beckham?

News.. Burt Reynolds dead.

his family say he will be cremated. So this time he will be more smokey than bandit.

How do I know thieves are bad kissers?

Because apparently I make out like a bandit.

Watch out for the bandit stealing and shredding newspapers.

It's breaking news.

What do you call a Panda who eats, shoots, and leaves?

A Pandit.

(bandit)
OC by BatManBenJamIn

You can explore bandit thug reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean bandit raider dad jokes. There are also bandit puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Why did the bandit from Burma vote for Trump and Hillary to be the primary candidates?

Because, Master Wayne, some men just want to watch the world burn.

There has been a multiple thefts of rubber bands in our office...

I guess you can say we have a Rubber Bandit

Why couldn't the cops catch the toilet bandit?

They had nothing to go on!!!

Somebody once told me...

Hands off my Macaroni, Milwaukee pasta bandit found dead. He was picking up the gun, with his finger and his thumb, raising up, pointed straight at his forehead.

You hear about that condiment bandit?

he smuggled as much as he could mustard

Bandit joke, You hear about that condiment bandit?

I once stole a simile

I made out like a bandit

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the bandit robbery jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working bandit smokey piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes