Balm Jokes

Following is our collection of wore humor and creme one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Balm puns for adults, dirty ointment jokes or clean fireball gags for kids.

There is an abundance of moisturizer jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 17 funniest jokes on balm. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any accidentally witze you can hear about balm.

The Best jokes about Balm

Women really do hold grudges over the smallest things...

My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm and I accidentally gave her a tube of super glue. It's been a week now and she's still not talking to me.

Lip Balm To My Wife

Earlier today my wife asked me to pass her some lip balm but I ended up giving her superglue by mistake. She's still not talking to me.

A middle aged woman walks into a grocery store…

She has been single for the past 5 years and is extremely lonely. She proceeds to collect a few things here and there from throughout the store. Lip balm, a gallon of milk, a few rolls of paper towels, chicken pot pies, and laundry detergent.

When she finishes finding all of her items she proceeded to the checkout counter. Immediately after she got in line a man came up behind her and began to wait as well. He had a 12 pack with him and was obviously drunk. He was staring at her groceries then up at her, swaying back and forth trying to keep balance.

You must be single? he asked her.

Normally she would ignore a stranger talking to her, especially one this drunk, but she was for some reason slightly intrigued. She noticed he kept looking at her groceries and up at her. Maybe he thought she was single based off what she was purchasing. Maybe he could point out something that would help her find someone to love.

Yes, I am single , she said. But can you tell me something? How can you tell I'm single? she said as she looked down at the few things in her basket.

cause….. he struggled to stand up and looked her in the eye. cause you're ugly.

My sister asked me for her lip balm. I accidentally gave her superglue

She's still not talking to me.

My wife asked me to pass her lip balm but I accidentally handed her superglue instead.

She's still not talking to me.


My wife asked me to pass the lip balm....

...by mistake I gave her the super glue and now she wont talk to me.

The result of a silly mistake...

Women really know how to hold a grudge. My wife asked me to pass her a lip balm. And by mistake, I gave her a tube of Super Glue. It's been a month now and she's still not speaking to me!

What did the terrorist say to the man with chapped lips?

"I have a balm!"

What do you call a tree that wears chapstick?

A balm tree

What does Joan Jett use when her lips are chapped?

Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-cherry balm!

I've come up with a way to stop homosexuality

Lip balm! - Rub it around your arsehole and it keeps the chaps away


Duck waddles in to a pharmacy and asks for some lip balm. "Certainly sir, will that be cash or credit?."

"Just put it on my bill."

This chapstick...

Is the balm.

Looking for a gift that will leave her speechless?

Gorilla glue lip balm.

My friends call me El Chapo...

...because I always keep at least an ounce of Burt's Bees lip balm on me at all times.

Cash or check?

A duck walks into a convenience store to buy lip balm. When he gets to the checkout the clerk asks "Will you be paying with cash or check?" the duck replies "Put it on my bill."

My friend with very dry lips caused his flight to make an emergency landing.

Crew members took action when they noticed he had boarded the plane with a balm.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes