Bald Jokes

Funniest Bald Short Jokes

Short bald jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bald humour may include short hairy jokes also.

1. If I ever start to go bald I'll get a rabbit tattooed onto my head..
   From a distance it would look like a hare
2. Why did the bald guy cut a hole in his pocket? Because he wanted to run his fingers through his hair.
3. Hear the one about the bald guy getting bumped to business class after passengers made fun of him? Talk about the advantages of a reseating airline.
4. I once knew a bald guy who liked to draw rabbits on his head but from a distance they looked like hares
5. Mommy, why is daddy bald? "Its because he thinks a lot sweetheart"
   The kid stared at his mom for a minute and asked
   "is that why you have a lot of hair?"
6. A man walks up his bald friend, rubs his head and says "smooth. Just like my wife's behind." The friend reaches up, rubs his head and replies "My gosh. You're right."
7. A friend of mine went bald years ago But he still carries around an old comb. He just can't part with it.
8. There was a lot of controversy with the bald man's will Turns out he didn't have any heirs
9. Why did the bald guy cut a hole in his pants pocket?? So he could run a hand through his hair!!!
10. What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday? Thanks ill never part with it

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Bald One Liners

Which bald one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bald? I can suggest the ones about shaved head and shaved hair.

1. What do you call a bald porcupine? Pointless.
2. I first noticed I was going bald When it took longer and longer to wash my face.
3. A bald guy slipped in the shower Fell on his head and slipped again.
4. I'm bald but still have my comb. I just can't part with it.
5. What do you call a barber that only works on bald people? An air stylist.
6. What did the bald man say to his hair? I don't know, but they had a real falling out
7. My luck is like a bald guy... ...who just won a comb.
8. How Can You Identify a Bald Eagle? All his feathers are combed to one side
9. What do you call an airplane full of bald people? Receding airlines...
10. Why did the bald guy leave the wig shop without a wig? because he forgot toupee
11. What's worse than finding hair in your food? Finding out the chef is bald.
12. I can't tell if I'm going bald... or if it's all in my head.
13. My wife left me because I kept making jokes about her going bald. Well that's hair loss
14. Did you hear about the bald man's will after he died? Turns out he didn't have any heirs.
15. What does a balding magician have in his hat? Hare.

Bald Man Jokes

Here is a list of funny bald man jokes and even better bald man puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What do you call a bald man on a windy day? Fortunate.
• A bald man... a bald man decides to take a shower, he enters the bathroom, slips due to water on the ground, falls on his head, slips again.
• Why did the bald man put a rabbit on his head? Cause it looked like hare from a distance.
• Prayers before going on a blind date Woman : oh god, I just hope he is not a serial killer,psychopath,needy, incel, stalker, poor,balding, ...
  Man : god , don't let her be fat..
• What do you call lice that lives in a bald man's head? Homeless
• What does a balding man and a tortoise have in common? Hare loss.
• A joke from my dad A balding man said to his wife
  "I've bought several rabbits for the garden"
  Why?
  "Well from a distance it'll look like I have lots of hare"
• What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas? "Thanks, I'll never part with it."
• What is it that no man wants but no man wants to lose? A bald head.
• You know, they're making the prospective Mars astronauts shave their whole bodies prior to departure. That way, when it's time for blastoff... they'll baldly go where no man has gone before.

Bald Head Jokes

Here is a list of funny bald head jokes and even better bald head puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• My girlfriend introduced our new baby to my friends. "Look at those chubby cheeks and bald head," they said.
  I said, "Thanks, but we're here to talk about the baby."
• What do you call it when a person shaves their head bald to blend in with cancer patients?... Chemoflage
• My dads solution to being bald "Draw bunnies on your head, from a distance they look like hares"
• I have the first signs of baldness, a friend said to me that my head it's like the house of a rich man... two car entrances in the front and a pool in the backyard.
• I took my dog to the vet because he was losing hair on his head. Apparently he's got male patting baldness.
• When I saw an old friend from school, he asked why I was bald. I replied "cancer." "Cancer?"
  "Yeah I asked the barber if he could shave my head, and he 'I sure cancer!'"
• If you put Proactive on bald eagles Will their white heads disappear?
• Did you know that if you pull all the hair out from your head and arrange them in a single file.. ..you'll end up getting bald.
• How do bald people wash their head? They use air conditioner.
• What is six inches long has a bald head and drives every woman crazy? 100$ bill

Bald Guy Jokes

Here is a list of funny bald guy jokes and even better bald guy puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I was gonna make a joke about a bald guy's hair... But then I remembered there was nothing to joke about.
• What is logic? A mute telling a deaf guy that a blind guy saw a paraplegic running behind a bald guy while grabbing his hair.
• How did medusa die? the bald guy she was trying to stone had just found a coin.
• A bald guy killed all the barbers in my town Boy, that was a hair raising tragedy
• What is truly pointless? To tell a bald guy a hair raising story.
• What do you call a bald guy named Gary? Garibaldi
• A balding guy asks his gf "What would make you leave me for another man? I would never ever leave you." She says: "Nor would I."
• Bald guy: "I'm not going bald I'm just getting more head."
• Here is a typical moroccan joke. A bald guy goes to the hamam... ...he slips and slips again.

Going Bald Jokes

Here is a list of funny going bald jokes and even better going bald puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I knew I was going bald when... I knew I was going bald when it started to take longer and longer to wash my face. - Harry Hill
• I'm really worried about this recession. I fear that I may go bald.
• I wouldn't say I was going bald, but.... When I asked my barber to cut my hair, he replied, "which one?"
• I'm balding and my girlfriend is going to leave me but she says I can stay under one condition. I must remane.
• When bald people wash there face, How far up do they go?
• What will Prince Harry do if he starts going bald? He'll wear a raspberry toupee
• Why is Picard the best possible captain for the Enterprise ? You can be sure he will baldly go where no man has gone before.
• Why did Harry Potter suddenly go bald in his teens? He lost his Hedwig
• My friend was going bald So I asked him, "Who's your barber, genetics?"
• What did René Descartes say when he went bald? Cogito hair go sum.

Comedy Bald Jokes to Make Your Friends Giggle

What funny jokes about bald you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean losing hair jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make bald pranks.