Bakers Jokes

Following is our collection of knead humor and pastry one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Bakers puns for adults, dirty inbread jokes or clean cooks gags for kids.

There is an abundance of bready jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 48 funniest jokes on bakers. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any focaccia witze you can hear about bakers.

The Best jokes about Bakers

I bought a chessboard cake from the bakers last week.

Took one bite, looked up, and said "it's stale mate".

He seemed surprised, said "no, mate".

So I handed him the cake and said "check mate".

A man walks into the bakers...

A man walks into the bakers with a salmon under his arm. He asks the woman behind the counter "Excuse me, do you serve fish cakes?"

The woman replies, "Of course we don't!"

The man points to the fish and shouts - "Well what am I supposed to do?! Its his birthday!"

When do bakers stop making donuts?

When they get tired of the hole thing

Why do bakers go into business?

Because they knead the dough

Why do bakers start working so early in the morning?

Because they knead dough.

French bakers hate me...

...I feel their pain.

There was once a pastry competition...

Many bakers submitted their desserts to the contest, but the judges were torn between two Italian chefs' pastries.

They said to the chefs, "We would love for both of you to win... *But there cannoli be one."*

What do you call a redneck family of bakers?


Why are bakers so crazy for dough?

They don't want it, they knead it.

Insulting Bakers is Good Fun

You can really get a rise out of them.

Why do bakers work so hard?

Because they knead the dough.

Did you know communist countries have the best bakers in the world?

People will line up for miles just to get a slice of their bread.

Where do bakers pick up their hookers?

The breadlight district

I know an old bakers secret

I'd tell you but it's on a kneed to know basis.

Bakers have a weird way of trading bread recipes.

Its done on a knead to know basis. Gotta get the dough somehow

Why do bakers get paid so much?

Because they knead the dough

Bakers trade bread recipes...

on a knead-to-know basis.

A guy was in a bakery and accidentally pushed open the door to the back room.

To his surprise, he saw one of the bakers lying down naked on a counter, kneading bread dough on his chest. The guy turned and said to another baker, "That's the oddest thing I have ever seen." The baker replied, "You should see him make the doughnuts!"

What do two sibling bakers create at night?


The International League of Bakers is inviting countries which mainly export baked goods to join.

They're accepting dough nations.

Why are bakers so secretive?

Because they work on a knead to know basis

I understand why bakers are addicted to baking bread.

Sometimes they just knead it.

Are your parents bakers?

Cause youre inbread.

Why/How do bakers work?

They knead the dough.

How do bakers deal with tough problems?

They ryes to the occasion and dough not quit.

Do bakers get depressed...?

Or do they just experience extreme self-loaving?

How do German bakers greet you?

Gluten tag!

Why do people choose to become bakers?

Because they knead the dough.

How do bakers share their professional secrets?

Purely on the knead to know basis.

What did the guy who burglarized the German bakers store at Christmas find out.

All of his cookies were Stollen.

What's a racist bakers favourite ingredient?


Don't marry bakers...

They're all inbread

What kind of dough do Hobbit bakers use?


What do gifted bakers take in high school?

AP Flour

Why don't insurance agents like bakers?

They are far too whisk-y.

Bakers only share their recipes on a knead to know basis.

Now that we've got the puns out of the way, how about some actually decent comments?

Why are bakers secretive with recipes?

Knead to know basis.

Why do bakers work so hard

Because they want that dough

There's a new social media app created by the bakers' union called breadit .

You can buy a loaf on it but only if it's stale and has been posted by 6 bakers in the last week.

Why do people become bakers?

Because they knead the dough. (Kneading hand motions required during recital.)

With a name like his, the prime minister of Canada missed out on owning a good baker shop

>Justin time bakers.
-Trudeau for true canadians-

Why do rednecks make the best bakers?

Cuz they're inbred.

Why don't more bakers make dill bread?

Because that woild require them to play with more dill dough.

A German bakers was robbed...

Apparently everything was stollen.

Why did the bakers get an abortion?

Their baby was inbred.

I work at a bakery and the bakers have the worst grammar...

It's "worse" not "badder"

Bakers are desperate thieves.

(They really knead the dough.)

Why was the bakers bread so expensive?

He needed the dough.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes