The Best 54 Baguette Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Baguette jokes. There are some baguette french jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these baguette croissant puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Baguette Jokes and Puns

I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in the cage

Zookeeper said it was bread in captivity

What's the policy at French morgues?

Baguette and tag it.

Why was the baguette excited for his audition?

He heard he might be playing a big roll

Baguette joke, Why was the baguette excited for his audition?

What did the German Kaiser roll say to the French baguette?

*Gluten tag*

what do you call a French OP

a baguette


What's the Indian way of saying 'Bread of Heaven'?

Is it:

A) Holy Loaf

B) Sacred Baguette

Or C) Naan of the above

Why don't Indians eat baguette?

Because there's naan there.

Baguette joke, Why don't Indians eat baguette?

How many French people does it take to bake a baguette?

8.

Because then they have wheat.

A german, a french and a turkish man on a plane

The plane is about to crash unless the passengers drop some weight. The pilot tells the three guys to drop something which they have enough of in their country.

The french man throws a baguette out of the window.

The turkish man throws a kebap out of the window.

The german throws the turkish man out of the window.

A Frenchman is buying a bread stick and the cashier asks..

"are you okay carrying this loaf?

to which he replies

baguette .

An American, a Frenchman, and a Canadian are all in a boat...

An American, a Frenchman, and a Canadian are all in a boat. The boat is sinking.

The Frenchman throws a baguette off of the boat, saying "We have too many of these in our country."

The American throws a computer off of the boat, saying "We have too many of these in our country."

The Canadian immediately throws the Frenchman off of the boat, saying "We have too many of these in our country."

You can explore baguette frenchman reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean baguette loaf dad jokes. There are also baguette puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


How do they package bread at the bakery?

They baguette.

What's the difference between a champion horse and a very tasty baguette?

One's wellbred, the other is good bread.

French don't bag things

They baguette

Gaius Julius Caesar walks into a baguette shop.

The owner stops him at the door and says: "I cannot believe you have the Gaul to just strut in here like that!"

How does a baguette fight end?

With a lot of pain.

Baguette joke, How does a baguette fight end?

A guy walks into a bakery

He buys bread, and the baker asks if he'd like his bread bagged in paper or plastic. The guy replies, "Baguette however you want".

Buying bread.

There's this guy who goes and buys a loaf of bread right? And at the shop the employee asks the guy if he wants a bag or not.
The guy thinks a little while...and then says yes please, baguette.

I was once attacked by a Frenchman with a baguette

That memory is still inbreaded within me.


Bob was grocery shopping in France...

Cashier: That'll be 20 euros.
Bob: Alrighty!
Cashier: Would you like a bag?
Bob: Sure. Baguette. ( อกยฐ อœส– อกยฐ)

Two cockroaches run into each other in a week old baguette

One says to the other, 'Hey, I thought I was the only roach from around these parts. Where you from?'

The other responds, 'Who, me? I was born in bread right here.'

A baker was smacked lightly with a baguette by his coworker.

He felt a small pain.

What did the Frenchman say when he got beat with baguette?

I'm in pain.

I saw a baguette in a cell at the zoo yesterday...

It was bread in captivity.

Did you hear about the guy who robbed the airport for food worth about $200?

He got away with a baguette and two sodas.

what do you call a guy with twirly mustache but not from france?

A fake baguette

I saw a baguette in a cage the other day

The sign read "Bread in captivity"

Did you hear about the French guy that got baked into a huge baguette?

He was in a lot of pain

A French internet cafe had to cancel a CS:GO tournament it was supposed to host, after someone stole all the baked goods.

The gamers could not tolerate that much baguette loss.

What is meant by virgin oil?

That nobody has dipped their baguette in it

What did the baker say to the baker.

Would you like to baguette?

Yesterday I went to the zoo and was sad to see a baguette in a cage...

The zookeeper told me it was ok though because it was bread in captivity.

I went to the store to buy bread but my card was declined.

The cashier told me to just Baguette and go

Lunch today was to die for.

Sesame seed baguette from Pret a Manger.

What do you call a female bag?

A baguette

So I just put a baguette in my microwave

Guess you could say that I witnessed a French Revolution.

Some French guy hit me with a baguette

I got pain

What did the frenchman say when his partner in crime asked if they should steal something?

Oui oui, baguette.

A friend of mine had a terrible accident in a baguette factory.

He's now in a lot of pain.

I was trying to eat a stale baguette

Safe to say, it was a pain

I have a pet baguette that remains in it's cage.

It's bread in captivity.

Went to the zoo to find a baguette caged

They said it was bread for captivity

Did you hear about the baker whose business was failing

He decided to baguette

I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in a cage

I guess you could say it was bread in captivity

Jesus, waving around a baguette at The Last Supper

"You wanna piece of me!?"

I went to the zoo yesterday and saw a baguette in a cage.

The zookeeper said it was bread in captivity.

Why was the dog shaped like a baguette?

Because it was bread that way.

I was at the zoo the other day when I noticed a baguette in one of the enclosures...

I went up to the zookeeper and asked why there was a baguette in a zoo. He replied "oh that?! It's bread in captivity"

My Friend Said To Me...

"I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in a cage. The zookeeper told me it was bread in captivity."

I thought about it for a sec and said back "Oh yeah? Well, I went to the zoo and saw a pretzel in a cage. They told me it was knot bread in captivity."

:3

A Frenchman is arrested for murder

He is convicted by an eye-witness acount. He then breaks out of jail and stabs his witness with a baguette. The witness' son sees this and stabs the killer with another baguette.
Vengeance baguettes more vengeance.

What do you call a baguette up your butt?

A pain in the ass

To kill a French vampire, you have to drive a baguette through its heart.

The process is painstaking.

To kill a French vampire, you have to drive a baguette through it's heart.

Sounds easy, but the process is painstaking.

1980s European leaders Mitterrand, Brezhnev and Thatcher were flying around Europe in a helicopter, trying to recognize cities without seeing them.

Thatcher went first. She stuck her ear out the window and stated: "I can hear Big Ben chime. This is London!"

Next was Mitterrand. He stuck his nose out and stated: "I can smell fresh baguette. This is Paris!"

Last was Brezhnev. He stuck his hand out and yelped: "What... hey! Somebody stole my watch! This is Moscow."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the baguette loaves jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working baguette sourdough piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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