Bad Mood Jokes
52 bad mood jokes and hilarious bad mood puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bad mood that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Bad Mood Short Jokes
Short bad mood jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bad mood humour may include short good mood jokes also.
- I bought my wife a mood ring. Found out if she's in a good mood it turns green.
If she's in a bad mood it leaves big red circles on my forehead.
- Mood ring Bought my girlfriend a mood ring the other day.
When she's in a good mood it turns green.
When she's in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on my forehead. - When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring... When she was in a good mood, it turned blue.
When she was in a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead... - Mood ring I got my wife a mood ring. When she's in a good mood it turns a beautiful shade of blue. When she's in a bad mood it leaves an ugly red mark on my forehead.
- Why was the girl in such a bad mood when she got out of jail? She had a period at the end of her sentence.
- My Wife decided to buy me a mood ring... ...to gauge my moods.
We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood it turns blue and when I'm in a bad mood it leaves a big red mark in her forehead. - Why is Santa in such a bad mood? Because he only comes once a year and it's down a chimney.
- I bough my wife a mood ring, and when she's in a good mood the ring turns blue. But when she's in a bad mood, it leaves a big red spot in the middle of my forehead.
- What do a helicopter in a bad mood needs ? A helipad
^^period, ^^^get ^^^it? ^^^^hehehe~ - I was in a bad mood when my annoying sister asked me, "What do beavers do to a river?" God dam it
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Bad Mood One Liners
Which bad mood one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bad mood? I can suggest the ones about happy mood and bad day.
- What Movie does Hillary Watch when she's in a Bad Mood..? Kill Bill.
- Why was Pac-Man in a bad mood after coming home from a date?
- Why was the Moon in a bad mood? It was just going through one of its phases.
- Why is Dairy Queen always in a bad mood? Because she's married to Mister Softee.
- Why was Aquaman's wife in a bad mood? She was going through minnow-pause
- Whenever I'm in a bad mood I get drunk and work out. It really lifts my spirits
- I'm not crazy; I've just been in a bad mood for the last ten years.
- What do you get if you cross a cow with a tension headache?
A bad mood. - What kind of food just puts you in a bad mood? Feel-awful
- Why is russian roulette bad for parties? It kills the mood
. - What do you call a German in a bad mood? A sour k**...
- My wife blame her bad mood on p**... I think she really is o**...-acting
- For the period from 2014-2015, I had no s**... My wife was in a VERY bad mood.
- How are a bad mood and f**... alike? Some people just won't cut it off.
Witty Bad Mood Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about bad mood you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean having a bad day jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make bad mood pranks.
A young boy comes home from school in a bad mood.
His father asks him, "What's wrong, son?" The kid tells his dad that he's upset because another kid has been teasing him and calling him gay. The father says, "Punch him in the face next time he does that. I bet he'll stop." The kid replies, "Yeah, but he's so cute!"
A young boy comes home from school in a bad mood.
His father asks him, "What's wrong, son?" The kid tells his dad that he's upset because another kid has been teasing him and calling him gay. The father says, "Punch him in the face next time he does that. I bet he'll stop." The kid replies, "Yeah, but he's so cute!"
It was a celebratory mood with the boys at NASA;
they had just made the scientific achievement of a lifetime.
As they were uncorking a bottle of champagne, Dr. Lowenstein, the head scientist at NASA, asked everyone to be quiet as he had received a congratulatory phone call from the President of the United States.
He picked up a special red phone, and spoke into it.
"Mr. President," said Dr. Lowenstein, grinning broadly, "after twelve years of hard research and billions of dollars spent, we have finally found intelligent life on Mars."
He listened for a second, and his smile gradually disappeared, replaced by a frown.
He said, "But that’s impossible... we could never do it. Yes Mr. President,” and hung up the phone.
He addressed the crowd of scientists staring at him curiously.
"I have some bad news," he said, "the President said that now that we’ve found intelligent life on Mars... he wants us to try to find it in Congress."
My therapist wanted to tell me about the 5 stages of grief. I said...
But nothing bad has happened! How DARE you imply that it has? I'm only paying half for this session. Thanks for ruining my good mood... Okay, tell me all about it.
My girlfriend got me a mood ring the other day but it didn't come with instructions. So far we know that if I'm in a good mood, it's green...
and if I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on her forehead.
An Englishman is having breakfast in Paris one morning....
...(coffee, croissants, bread, butter and jam) when a Frenchman chewing bubble-gum, sits down next to him. The Englishman ignores the Frenchman who, nevertheless, starts a conversation.
Frenchman: 'You English folk eat the whole bread??'
Englishman (in a bad mood): 'Of course.'
Frenchman: (after blowing a huge bubble) 'We don't. In France , we only eat what's inside.. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants and sell them to England .' The Frenchman has a smirk on his face.
The Englishman listens in silence.
The Frenchman persists: 'Do you eat jam with the bread??'
Englishman: 'Of Course.'
Frenchman: (cracking his bubble-gum between his teeth and chuckling).
'We don't. In France we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam, and sell the jam to England .'
After a moment of silence, The Englishman then asks: 'Do you have s**... in France ?'
Frenchman: 'Why of course we do', he says with a big smirk.
Englishman: 'And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?'
Frenchman: 'We throw them away, of course.'
Englishman: 'We don't. In England , we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into bubble-gum, and sell them to France .'
A young married couple are shy about s**...
and it was difficult for them the talk about it to each other. They decided to use an innocent phrase if they wanted to do the deed. They came up with the idea to call s**... "doing the wash".
One night the young husband asked his wife if she wanted to go do the wash. She told him she was not in the mood, and he went to bed alone. The wife began to feel bad that she had denied her husband his pleasure, and shortly followed to the bedroom and told him that they could do the wash, to which he replied, "That's okay dear, it was a small load, so I did it by hand."
So, a travelling salesman walks up to a woman's house...
The woman is in a bad mood, but answers the door anyway. Seeing that the salesman has nothing of interest to her, she shuts the door. However, the door does not shut all the way and bounces back open. She thinks that the salesman was sticking his foot in the doorway to prevent her from closing the door. She was not in the mood for that and decides to slam the door on his foot to drive him off. The door bounces back open. Getting really frustrated, she grabs the door and prepares to give it a huge slam. Before she slams however, the salesman says, "Ma'am, before you do that, I would advise moving your cat."
Santa was having a really bad day....
Everything was going wrong. The elves were looking for a raise, Rudolph was sick, Mrs Clause was in a foul mood. So the Angel arrived at the door dragging a Christmas tree he asked Santa, what will I do with the tree ?
And that is why you will always find an Angel sitting on top of the Christmas tree.
A wife has a c**... day and decides to come home early from work
When she arrives home, she heads upstairs and finds 2 pairs of legs in her bed under the covers. Already in a bad mood, she grabs a baseball bat and has a few swings at her cheating husband and his mistress. Once she's done, she walks to her balcony and finds her husband. He lovingly greets her with "Hi honey, your parents dropped in for a visit, they were feeling a little tired so I let them sleep in our bed".
Carl is always really cranky in the morning...
"Carl, you should really do something about your bad mood," Says his boss, as Carl enters office with a long face once again.
"I'm sorry, but there's nothing I can do about it, boss."
"You know how I prevent this?" Answers his boss, "I make sure to have s**... with my wife every time before I go to work. It's a great way to start off the day. Perhaps you should try this yourself."
The next day Carl enters office, he seems very upbeat.
"Good day Carl, I see you're doing much better. Did you take my advice?" says his boss.
"I'm glad I did, boss! It really helped," answers Carl. "By the way, I didn't know you lived in such a nice place!"
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer.
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "I'm sick of the wife complaining. Last night she said 'You always come home from work in a bad mood. I can't remember the last time you walked through that door with a smile on your face.'" the guy says. "Of course she can't. She wasn't living there then."
My boss came into the store yesterday
I was working alone and there were at least 5 people in there. That is when my boss walked in, clearly in a bad mood. He walked right up to me and said, "You're fired!" I couldn't believe it, and in the middle of a rush. I immediately paused Netflix and asked, "Why?"
Mood 𝑺𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒈
Two women are shopping and talking about their husbands. One says, "My husband said he was getting impatient with my mood swings, so he bought me a mood ring the other day to monitor my moods." "How'd that work out?" asked the second woman. "Well," said the first, "When I'm in a good mood, it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big, flipping red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond."
