Bad Cow Jokes

34 bad cow jokes and hilarious bad cow puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bad cow that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Bad Cow Short Jokes

Short bad cow jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bad cow humour may include short mad cow jokes also.

  1. The butcher shouldn't put the names of the cows on the packaging. I feel really bad eating good old Chuck.
  2. What did the gourd say to the zucchini about their bad relations with a cow. We gotta squash this beef.
  3. Cows People who think that cows are bad for the environment have udderly failed in school.
  4. What's a cows favorite type of tv show A cows favorite type of tv show is animoo...
    I'm bad at jokes
  5. [Bad Joke OC] Why shouldn't you interrupt a debate between cows in a m**... field? The steaks are too high.

Share These Bad Cow Jokes With Friends

Bad Cow One Liners

Which bad cow one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bad cow? I can suggest the ones about fat cow and bovine cow.

  1. Why was the farmer angry? Because his cows put him in a bad moooo'd.
  2. Bad cows, bad cows, whatcha gonna moo?!
  3. It's a bad idea to eat the meat from the female cows. That would be a Miss Steak.
  4. Why do cows have bad breath? Because they breathe dairy-air.
  5. What do you get if you cross a cow with a tension headache?
    A bad mood.
  6. What do you call a cow bringing an unfortunate message? A bearer of bad moos
  7. Why are blondes such bad cow herders? Because they can't keep their calves together
  8. Chuck Norris scares cows so bad, milk comes out their nose.
  9. What do you call a dumb cow who is bad at grammar? An oxymoron.
  10. Where do you send bad Russian cows? The Moolag
  11. What did the female cow say after bad s**... That was bull.
  12. Why is it bad luck to feed a cow w**...? Because of the high steaks.

Ridiculous Bad Cow Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter

What funny jokes about bad cow you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean holy cow jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make bad cow pranks.

3 bad dad jokes

I use these back to back to back all the time.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk
What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A highly successful blonde business woman was headed west

She was on her way to a work conference, driving through Arkansas.
As she's cruising along she comes across a farm and out in the middle of the field is a blonde in a rowboat, surrounded by cows, rowing like mad and going nowhere.
She's p**.... She pulls over and jumps out of her car, runs up to the fence, and begins shouting.
"I don't know who the h**... you are, but you're giving all of us blondes a bad name. If I could swim, I'd come over there and kick your a**...!"

Farmer Dave

So I knew this farmer, his name was Dave and he wasn't really bright, but he tried his best.
One day he called me over to his farm and announced proudly that he was feeding his cows m**.... I was skeptical and told him it was a bad idea, but he didn't listen.
The next day he called me, and told me the news. The cows had died.
I said, "Oh no Dave, I'm so sorry to hear that. What are you gonna do now?" He said he was gonna try and sell their hides and meat, "Hey do you want some too?"
I said, "Nah, the steaks are too high."

It was all a big misunderstanding..

A farmer is sitting in the neighborhood bar getting drunk. A man comes in and asks the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day getting drunk?"
Farmer: "Some things you just can't explain."
Man: "So what happened that's so horrible?"
Farmer: "Well, today I was sitting by my cow milking her. Just as I got the bucket about full, she took her left leg and kicked over the bucket."
Man: "OK, but that's not so bad."
Farmer: "Some things you just can't explain."
Man: " So what happened then? "
Farmer: " I took her left leg and tied it to the post on the left . "
Man: "Again?"
Farmer: "Some things you just can't explain."
Man: "So, what did you do then?"
Farmer: " I took her right leg this time and tied it to the post on the right. "
Man: "And then?"
Man: "And then?"
Farmer: "Well, 1 sat back down and continued to milk her. Just as I got the bucket about full, she took her right leg and kicked over the bucket."
Farmer: "Well, I sat back down and began milking her again. Just as I got the bucket about full, the s**... cow knocked over the bucket with her tail."
Man: "Hmmm..."
Farmer: "Some things you just can't explain."
Man: "So, what did you do?"
Farmer: "Well, I didn't have any more rope, so I took off my belt and tied her tail to the rafter. In that moment, my pants fell down and my wife walked in. "

One day a farmer wakes up to go check on his cheese cow.

He walks up and finds her dead in the grass. The man is so upset he kills himself. Then his wife wakes up. She finds her husband dead and goes to the lake and kills herself. Next the first son wakes up and notices everybody is dead. He goes down to the river and sees a mermaid. She swims up to him and says, "Having a bad day, huh? I'll tell you what. If you make love to me ten times in a row without stopping, I'll bring everyone back to life. But if you don't, I will kill you." He tries to do it, but doesn't make it. She kills him. Then the second son wakes up and after seeing his dead parents, also goes to the river where he sees his dead brother. The same mermaid swims up and tells him what she told his brother. He asks, "If I make love to you 20 times, what will you do?" She tells him, "If you are able to perform 20 times in a row, I will bring everyone back and make you the richest man alive." He then asks, "Well if I do it 20 times in a row, what's stopping you from dying? That's what happened to the cow."