Bad Boyfriend Jokes
23 bad boyfriend jokes and hilarious bad boyfriend puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bad boyfriend that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Bad Boyfriend Short Jokes
Short bad boyfriend jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The bad boyfriend humour may include short bad husband jokes also.
- I feel bad for my mail man and hope he finds a boyfriend soon He doesn't seem too picky or anything, he's just looking for any outgoing male.
- Why are so many girls bad at parallel parking? Because for years their boyfriends have been telling them the four inches they have is nine inches.
- My girlfriend is perfect in every way! She is funny, has an amazing body, and is so beautiful when she is asleep.
Too bad she doesn't know I'm her boyfriend. - Don't feel bad My boyfriend broke up with me recently. Do you feel bad? Don't because he's dead now.
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Bad Boyfriend One Liners
Which bad boyfriend one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with bad boyfriend? I can suggest the ones about bad relationship and girlfriend boyfriend.
- Why is Spider-Man a bad boyfriend? He's super clingy.
- Why do robots make bad boyfriends? They just screw, nut, then bolt.
- Why is the handyman a bad boyfriend? He nuts and bolts.
- I once had a boyfriend called Justin He was really bad at s**...
Great Bad Boyfriend Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends
What funny jokes about bad boyfriend you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean ex boyfriend jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make bad boyfriend pranks.
Father looks out the window on a snowy evening.
He gets furious and turns red.
"What's the matter, dear," his wife asks.
"It's our daughter's new boyfriend. He's written his name in the snow with pee."
"Oh. That's not so bad."
"Yeah, but it's in *her* handwriting."
A teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents.
They were appalled at his spiky hair, pierced nose, tattoos and a bad attitude. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. "Honey," the mother said, "he doesn't seem very nice."
"Of course he is," the daughter replied. "If he wasn't nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?"
I'm cannot stand to live with my flatmate anymore
She doesnt clean the flat, she doesn't cook and she basically just uses me for free rides.
I'm want to move so badly but my boyfriend says "we can't abandon our daughter."
A girl asks her father
Dad, what's the difference between good, bad, and f***d up?
The father replies:
Well my love, good is when your boyfriend likes your clothes, bad is when he wears them and f****d up is when they look better on him than you!
(Bad translation from spanish from yours truly, have a wonderful day!)
An ugly girl was sitting alone in a restaurant
I feel bad for that girl. I said to my date.
Moments later, a man who appeared to be her boyfriend walked over and sat down in her booth.
I feel bad for that guy.
At the Hospital
At Hospital
Nurse : Why are you hurt so badly ?
Girl : My boyfriend dump me
Nurse : Don't need to hurt yourself, there are plenty of guys. You are still young and pretty.
Girl : He dump me from 4th floor.
A Blonde and her boyfriend are watching the 9pm news
A Blonde and her boyfriend are watching the 9pm news, the anchor is showing a video of a girl threatening to jump off a cliff. The guy turns to the Blonde and says "I bet you $500 she jumps" "you're on" the Blonde replies.
2 minutes later the girl jumps and dies.
As she is pulling money out her purse, the boyfriend says "I feel bad taking your money, but I watched the 6pm news and I saw this story" "me too" the Blonde answered, "but I didn't think she would be s**... enough to jump off again"
German couple rush to a Jewish Hospital
A German couple are rushed to a Jewish hospital after a huge hailstorm. The boyfriend's right hand was cut, and the girlfriend's head is in really bad shape, so the couple go to the emergency room. A rabbi - who is accompanying and praying for all the patients in the emergency room - is in shock of how the girlfriend managed to be in the condition she was in. The rabbi asks the boyfriend, "what hit her?" The boyfriend still panting after rushing to the hospital pointing with his bandaged hand and quickly mutters, "hail-hit-her!"
Two friends, Louis and Moe, walk down a street discussing about a girl.
Louis has been on a bit of a dry spell and is craving some tangy p. Recently, he has caught the attention of this girl, who he thinks is hot. She has made s**... advances. Louis has yet to respond accordingly due to bad timing but wants to oblige her. Moe has heard from her ex-boyfriend that she is easily moisted but may not be too healthy, in regards to this context. He disapproves of Louis going through with it because he had experienced getting s**... once before.
So Moe says to him, Don't do it dude, trust me.
Louis thinks intently about it and says I could see where you're coming from…
But I could also see where she is coming from.
So 4 guys are talking in a bar.
So 4 guys are talking in a bar, one leaves to go to the restroom while the others continue to talk. They start talking about the success of their sons, the first man says "my son's car company is so successful he was able to get his best friend a new Ferrari for his birthday." The second man boasts "well my son's real estate company is so successful he was able to give his best friend a new house for his birthday." The third man says "my son's airline company is so successful he was able to give his best friend a private jet for his birthday. The forth man comes back from the restroom and asks what everyone is talking about, they reply back "we're just talking about the success of our sons." The forth man says "oh, my son is a gay stripper," the other three men feel sorry for him and apologize, but the forth man simply says "don't worry about it, it's not that bad, for his birthday he got a new ferrari, house, and a private jet from his three boyfriends."
Duke!!
A new boyfriend is having dinner at his new girlfriends house. He walks in shakes hands with everybody, and then they sit down and begin eating. A few minutes into the meal, the boyfriend realizes that he really needs to f**..., really badly. He quickly glances around, and notices the family's dog, Duke, is sitting right next to him. He takes advantage of his good fortune, and quickly let's out his f**.... Everyone at the table stops eating, looks up, and says, "Duke!" Relieved, the boyfriend begins eating again.
Several minutes later, the boyfriend realizes that he has to f**... again. Luckily, Duke is still by his side, so he once again quickly let's his f**... go. "Duke!" the family cries once again. The boyfriend is now very pleased with himself that he is blaming Duke for the farts, and not getting blamed himself.
Several minutes pass, and once again, the boyfriend decides that he needs to let one rip. The boyfriend once again releases his f**..., and in reply the family shouts, "Duke, get away from him before he craps on you!"