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Backseat Jokes

47 backseat jokes and hilarious backseat puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about backseat that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Ensure you stay alive and keep your driver entertained on long car rides with these backseat jokes. From driver's licence to seatbelt puns, these rearview mirror jokes will have everyone in stitches. Put your geometry skills to the test with these jokes and pass the time with ease!

Funniest Backseat Short Jokes

Short backseat jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The backseat humour may include short back seat jokes also.

  1. I yelled "shotgun", long before anyone else, but I still got to sit in the backseat. I hate cops.
  2. "Dad, why is my sister called Paris?" "Because we conceived her in Paris."
    "ahh, thanks Dad! "
    "You're welcome, Backseat."
  3. Children left alone in the backseat can cause accidents, which is ironic considering that accidents in the backseat can cause children.
  4. I want to die in my sleep, like my grandpa did. and not screaming like the passengers in the backseat.
  5. They say kids in the backseat cause accidents... But accidents in the backseat are more likely to cause kids.
  6. Accidents Happen Kids in the backseat cause accidents. Accidents in the backseat cause kids!
  7. I took a ride last night, and I guess Uber will just hire anyone now. I had to sit in the backseat because the driver's guide-dog was riding shotgun.
  8. My son, Carson, asked me where he got his name I told him, "well you were conceived in the backseat of my car, so you're our car-son"
  9. From Jimmy Carr Backseat drivers are always the same, why are we driving into the woods! Let me out! .
  10. Son: Dad, why is my sister's name Florence? Dad: Because we conceived her in Florence, Italy.
    Son: I guess that's a nice way of naming your kids.
    Dad: Yeah, Backseat, it is.

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Backseat One Liners

Which backseat one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with backseat? I can suggest the ones about passenger seat and car seat.

  1. Today I Called Shotgun... And the cop still put me in the backseat...
  2. My balloon elephant wouldn't fit in my backseat So I had to pop the trunk
  3. Children in the backseat cause accidents. But accidents in the backseat cause children.
  4. What do you call a golf club in the rear of your car? A backseat driver
  5. When you call shotgun, but the police put you in the back-seat anyway.
  6. Why do people hate terrorists on a plane? They love being backseat drivers.
  7. If it's a Smart Car then... Why does it not eject backseat drivers?
  8. Why was Kurt Cobain a backseat driver? Courtney had shotgun.
  9. Why did dave go into the backseat? Because kurt called shotgun.
  10. What has more brains than JFK? The backseat of his car
  11. What would Rosa Park's boy band name be? "The Backseat Boys"

Backseat Driver Jokes

Here is a list of funny backseat driver jokes and even better backseat driver puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • [demetri martin] A drunk driver is very dangerous. Everybody knows that. But so is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.
    "Go left."
    -"Dude those are trees."
    "trust me."

Backseat Blonde Jokes

Here is a list of funny backseat blonde jokes and even better backseat blonde puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Driving test (Blonde) Why did the blonde keep failing her driving test?
    Every time the instructor said "let's start" she would jump to the backseat ...
    ....
    ....
Backseat joke, Driving test (Blonde)

Backseat joke, Driving test (Blonde)

Comical & Quirky Backseat Jokes for a Roaring Good Time

What funny jokes about backseat you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean driving seat jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make backseat pranks.

This is an old joke that my teacher told me when I was little and most people probably already know it but I remember loving it.

A police officer pulls over a man who has penguins in the backseat of the car.
"Sir you can't have penguins in your car. Bring them to the zoo or something," the police officer tells the man.
The next day, the police officer sees the man again. Again, the penguins are in the backseat of the car.
"Sir, I told you to take the penguins to the zoo!"
"I did, Officer! Today I'm taking them to the movies."

A circus performer is driving home after a long day of training, when he is pulled over by a police officer for a broken light.

The officer looks in the car and sees a collection of knives in the backseat.
Sir, he says, Why do you have all those knives?
They're for my juggling act, the circus performer replies.
I don't believe you, says the cop. Prove it. So the performer gets out of his car and begins juggling the knives flawlessly.
Just at that moment, a car with two guys in it drives by. "Wow, says one to the other. I'm glad I quit drinking. These new sobriety tests are hard.

My wife said she wanted to have s**... in the backseat of the car

and she wanted me to drive

Found this one in my 2014 meme stash

A police officer pulled over a car on a deserted highway and told the driver, "Congratulations! You're the first person here today who was wearing a seat belt and now you're entitled to a prize of 1000$. What are you gonna do with your money?"
"Well", replied the man, "I think I'm gonna get a driver's license."
"Oh, Ignore him.", his wife said, "He always speaks nonsense when he's drunk."
"I KNEW IT!", his father bellowed from the backseat, "I KNEW WE WON'T GET FAR IN A STOLEN CAR."
Then came the voice from the trunk, "Are we over the border yet?"

A man was pulled over...

A man was pulled over, and the officer noticed a group of penguins in the backseat.
Officer: You need to take those penguins to the zoo.
Man: Ok, I will.
The next day the man was pulled over by the officer and he notices the same group of penguins in the backseat but they all had sunglasses on.
Officer: I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo.
Man: I did. Today we're going to the beach.

I'm sitting in a bar having a drink ...

... and I see man fall down. I go over and pick him up. "Bartender, do you know where this man lives? I'll give him a lift home." He tells me where he lives. I grab the guy, pull him down to the car, put him in the car, he falls into the backseat. I get to the address, pull the man out, he falls down three more times, I pick him up each time. I knock on the door, his wife answers. I say "I brought your husband home." She says "Where's his wheelchair?"

A police officer stops a speeding car and walks up to the driver

"Do you know you were going 20 km/h over the speed limit ?"
The guy respond : "How am I supposed to know ? I don't have a license".
His wife, sitting on the passenger seat, interjects : "Don't listen to him, he's drunk."
Their kid, on the backseat, sighs "I knew we weren't going to go far with a stolen car..."
A voice comes out of the trunk "Did we pass the border yet ?"

A nun gets into a cab

The cab driver sees her in the backseat and says "I have always had a fantasy about nuns."
She answers "you and everyone else! Are you a Catholic?"
Driver says yes, so she tells him to pull over.
She hops in the front seat and gives him the best b**... he ever had. She gets done and the cabbie feels guilty and says "You know sister, I have to confess. I am not really Catholic."
"That's fine. My name is Ralph and I am going to a costume party."

Schrödinger is in a car...

...and gets pulled over by a cop for speeding. The cop, after writing a ticket, notices a peculiar smell and asks to check for the source. After looking under the car, glancing over at the backseat and popping the trunk, he rushes over.
Cop: "Sir! Did you know you have a dead cat in your trunk?"
Schrödinger: "I do now"

Was driving on the freeway

And over in the fast lane a concrete delivery truck went by and following behind was a contractor in his normal truck. So I pointed it out to the kids in backseat.
Kids asked where they were going.
I replied I don't know but bet when they get there they will have a concrete plan.
The groans were were like a symphony

Three kids ask their mom about their unusual names.

The first kid asks, Why am I named Kitchen Table? His mom says, Well sweetie, when you were born the car was out of gas and we couldn't get to the hospital, so you were born on the kitchen table.
The second kid asks, Why am I named Backseat? Her mom says, Well honey, when *you* were born, we got stuck in traffic on the way to the hospital, and you were born in the backseat of the car.
The third kid says, That's neat. But mom, why am I the only one with a normal name?
His mom just says, I wouldn't worry about it too much, John.

GRAND THEFT AUTO

A blonde get's in her car and notices her steering wheel, dashboard, and windshield is missing. She calls the police and reports a theft. When the police officer comes, he looks at the blonde who is crying and and says, "Ma'am...you're sitting in the backseat..."

What is the difference between thrifting and s**... in the backseat of a car?

Nothing, the dress is still half off

I was out driving last night, when I started feeling a little bit h**...…

I picked up a h**... and did her in the backseat and really enjoyed myself, but I think I failed my driving test…

A blonde gets in her car...

and notices that her dashboard windshield and steering wheel were missing she called the cops and reported a theft when the cops arrived she was crying in her car and the cops went up to her and said "Ma'am you are sitting in the backseat".

A cop pulls over a man with 20 penguins in the backseat

He lets him off with a warning and asks him to take them to the zoo.
Next day, he again pulls him over and the penguins are still in the car.
"Didn't I tell you to take them to the zoo yesterday?! Why are you still driving them around?"
"I did take them to the zoo yesterday." says the man. "Today I am taking them to the movies."

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, just like my grandpa...

and not like the rest of the family screaming in the backseat

An elderly woman is driving 17 mph on a highway

A cop pulls her over and says Ma'am, you should know driving too slow is as much of a risk as driving too fast.
The woman pointed to a sign and said But Officer, I was going exactly the speed limit!
The officer says That's the route number. You're on US-17. He notices another elderly woman passed out in the backseat. Who is your passenger and why is she passed out?
The woman says Oh dear, we just got off State Route 112!

A boy asks his Dad one day.

"Dad, why is my sister called Paris?"
His Dad replies, "Because she was conceived in Paris."
The boy says, "Ahh, thanks Dad."
His Dad says, "You're welcome, Backseat."

Backseat joke, A boy asks his Dad one day.

jokes about backseat