Backdoor Jokes

Following is our collection of malware humor and sneaky one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Backdoor puns for adults, dirty peephole jokes or clean keyhole gags for kids.

There is an abundance of hacker jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 22 funniest jokes on backdoor. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any quick witze you can hear about backdoor.

The Best jokes about Backdoor

I was banging this hot chick on her kitchen table when we heard the front door open

She said "it's my husband!. Quick, try the backdoor!"

Thinking back, I really should have ran but you don't get offers like that every day.

Apple, the FBI, and John McAfee are sitting in an office...

Only two were invited, but the third one got in through the backdoor.

The Barbershop

So the other day I walked into a barbershop,

The barber came up to me and asked," Hey how can I help you sir??"

I told him that, " I just need a short cut" as I walked across his store and

right out through the backdoor

Hacking is like gay sex...

you enter a backdoor hoping there are no logs.

A physicist, a biologist, a mathematician, and a computer scientist get coffee at a street cafΓ©.

A physicist, a biologist, a mathematician, and a computer scientist are sitting in a street cafΓ© watching people entering and leaving the house on the other side of the street. First they see two people entering the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three people leaving the house.

The physicist says, "The measurement wasn't accurate."

The biologist says, "They must have reproduced."

The mathematician says, "If one more person enters the house then it will be empty."

The computer scientist says, "They must have used a backdoor."


A physicist, a biologist, a programmer, and a mathematician ....

are sitting at a cafΓ© across from an empty building.

They observe two people enter and then, later, three leave.

The physicist says, "Apparently there was some error with our measurements."

The biologist says, "Obviously, they reproduced while in the building."

The mathematician opines, "If now one more were to enter the building, it would again be empty."

And then the programmer replies "they must've used a backdoor".

What do Bill Cosby and a burglar have in common?

They both wait until you're asleep, then come in the backdoor.

A Philosopher, a Physicist and a mathematician look at a church...

They watch as two people enter the church. Later, three people exit.
"A wonder!", shouts the philosopher.
The physicist just says: "Nah, there must be a backdoor somewhere."
The philosopher nods, satisfied with the explanation.

Suddenly, the mathematician says: "Hey! If one of us goes in there, then there's no one inside!"

Three Girls and The Back Door

A young man was curious as to what girls thought about sex in the "back-door". So, out of curiosity and a lack of shame, he decides to ask three different girls if they would like to try it in the "back door".

The first girl he asked was American, and when asked about her opinion she punched the young man to the asphalt before storming off.

The second girl he asked was French, and when asked about her opinion she blushed and said that she would be willing to try anything once.

The third girl he asked was German, and when asked about her opinion she said, "Alright! Bend over!"

Hooked up with this woman for a nooner

We were in bed going at whrn she hears her husband coming in the front door. She says "quick use the backdoor." Looking back I probably should have left, but how often do you get an offer like that.

My grandfather would always go on about the old days and how they could leave their backdoor open

which is probably why his submarine sank.


I was hooking with this woman until her husband came home

She told me to use the backdoor...

and I should've left, but you don't get an offer like that too often

A man walks into a pet shop and sees a dog for $10,000

"Why does the dog cost that much?", asked the man. The owner replies, "This dog can do karate. Here, watch."

The owner then walks to a table and speaks to the dog, "Karate this table". The dog lifts a paw and in one swift movement cuts the table into two.

As the man looks on in shock, the owner then says "Karate the backdoor." The dog goes to the backdoor and breaks it with its paw.

"Amazing!", says the man. "I will buy this dog!". He buys the dog and goes home and tells his wife he bought a dog for $10,000. The wife gets angry.

"Why on earth would you buy a dog for that much money?!"

"Because this dog can do karate."

"Karate my foot!"

Girls are like walmarts.

If you go in through the backdoor and start peeing someone might start shouting at you.

How did gay santa deliver presents?

He went through the backdoor.

I tried to break into the Apple Store but...

...the backdoor was locked and they didn't have any windows

Baby are you an iphone encryption?

Because I want to go through your backdoor

My grandmother said that in the old days, she would leave her backdoor open...

and that's how my dad was born.

What do you do when your Apple device gets warm?

Ask apple to open the backdoor.


What do you call it when someone asks their friend to stayas a wingman at a party with them and then sneaks out the backdoor themselves five minutes later?

Scotland.

Going into a gay bar's backdoor doesn't make you gay.

However…going in and out and in and out and in…

To me, woman's pants are a lot like an exclusive country club.

I'm not getting into either, unless I lie about my income or sneak in the backdoor.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes