Bachelors Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

Why are bachelors thin, and married men fat?

Bachelors come home, check to see what's in the fridge, and go to bed.

….Married men come home, check to see what's in the bed, and go the fridge.

Two engaged bachelors were talking about their sexual goals entering marriage...

The first said "I'm going to spank my wife more often than her dad did!" The second said, "Hell, I'm hoping to fuck my wife more than her dad did."

Why are Bachelors slimmer than the Married Men?

Bachelors return from work. See the same boring stuff in the 'FRIDGE' n go to 'BED'.

Married Men return from work. See the same boring stuff in 'BED' n go to the 'FRIDGE'.

Why bachelors are skinner than married men

A bachelor goes into the kitchen, opens the fridge, sighs, goes to bed.

A married man goes into the bedroom, lifts the blanket, sighs, goes to the fridge.

Can't cook

Two bachelors, Larry and Frank were out to dinner. The conversation drifted from office, sports to politics and then to cooking.
I got a cook book once said Larry. But I couldn't do anything with it.
Too much fancy stuff in it, huh? asked Frank.
You said it, Larry replied, nodding.
Every one of those recipes began the same way: Take a clean plate…

My friend just got his bachelors in mathematics and my GF just asked

gf: "What's a common problem for a math major?"

friend: "getting laid"

There was a convention for lazy-eyed bachelors and bachelorettes. There was a massive turn out: Most of them ended with a perfect mate....

You could say that their eyes crossed in a crowded room.

What are the funniest bachelors jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Bachelors? Well, here are the best Bachelors puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Bachelors pick up lines to share with friends.

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