Babysitting Jokes
22 babysitting jokes and hilarious babysitting puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about babysitting that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Need some humorous babysitting jokes for Easter weekend? Check out this article for the funniest grandparent babysitting jokes that will have you and your family in stitches. From grandma babysitting her grandkids to a hilarious spin on softball, these jokes will keep the laughter alive!
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Funniest Babysitting Short Jokes
Short babysitting jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The babysitting humour may include short babysitter jokes also.
- I don't get anti-vaxxers. If you want a trial version of a kid why don't you borrow your friend's and babysit it instead of letting your own expire?
- What's the difference between your child and your husband? At least you can leave your child alone with the babysit
- How does a black person babysit the white neighbor kid? He Puts him in the cupboard with the rest of the crackers.
- Back in the 90's, Gran used to babysit us kids. One time she saw us playing playstation and said 'You're not playing that drug game!' 'What drug game?' I asked Need for Speed
- P1: what's the difference between a baby and a toothbrush? P2: i don't know
P1: well, I'm never letting you babysit - I'm babysitting for a single mom who is an hour late... She's probably getting pregnant right now...
- What does a cow say when you're in its way? "Moooove!"
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I thought of this one while babysitting. - Heres what you do:
1. Dinner
2. Kiss
3. Movie
4. s**...
5. Bring her back home
6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting - Do you know the difference between twelve-year-old scotch and baby formula? No? Then you're sure as h**... not babysitting for my kids!
- When I was 15 I got fired from my babysitting job when I lost my r**... neighbor at the mall... I guess you could say I've been looking for that special someone ever since.
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Babysitting One Liners
Which babysitting one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with babysitting? I can suggest the ones about baby sitting and child care.
- I lost 40 pounds in a day; but I also lost my babysitting job.
- what do you call fortnite during the day? Babysitting
- Yo mama's so old she used to babysit Jesus.
- What do you get when you hire an owl to babysit your kids? A real hootenanny!
- Cosby, Duggar & Fogle babysitting services.... We watch the kids, mom gets some rest.
- Yo mama so old, she had to babysit Jesus.
- We once let a Chinese man baby-sit our dog We never saw him again.
The man, not the dog. - Why was the woman sitting on the baby? She was babysitting.
- Why don't chickens babysit? Because they sit on their own.
- I lost my virginity at 11. I was r**... last time my dad babysits me
- What's worse than Louis c**... babysitting your kids? Kevin Spacey giving them a bath
Charming Humor Babysitting Jokes with Loads of Fun
What funny jokes about babysitting you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean nanny jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make babysitting pranks.
I went to my girlfriend's house last night for a romantic night in...
It was amazing, we had a three course meal with champagne over candle light, we then snuggled up on the sofa, to watch a movie, then, when we went up stairs, I let her get changed, while I spread rose petals over the bed, then, we had the most amazing, mind blowing s**... that I've ever had, but just as I was about to finish, her parents walked in...
I am now banned from babysitting.
Dont see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return.
If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too though.
My dad was babysitting my two children, so I called him later to ask how it was going.
Me: "What did they have for dinner?"
Dad: "Which one? Charlie or Clark?"
Me: "Charlie"
Dad: "Spaghetti"
Me: "What about Clark?"
Dad: "Spaghetti"
Me: "Ok ... So what time did they go to bed?"
Dad: "Which one? Charlie or Clark?"
Me: "Charlie"
Dad: "7:30"
Me: "And Clark dad?"
Dad: "Also 7:30"
Me: "If the answers are the same, why are you telling me them separately?"
Dad: "Well, I was the one looking after Charlie".
Me: "oh, who was looking after Clark then?"
Dad: "Me".
Fruity
While babysitting, I was preparing a snack for my best friends daughter. Wasn't sure what I should give her, and noticed I had a lot of fruit. So I asked her "What's your favorite fruit?" She looked at me with complete seriousness, and said "loops".
