Axis Jokes

Following is our collection of derivative humor and vertical one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Axis puns for adults, dirty gamma jokes or clean coordinate gags for kids.

There is an abundance of theories jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 23 funniest jokes on axis. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any molecular witze you can hear about axis.

The Best jokes about Axis

I love the way the Earth spins on its axis.

it always makes my day.

I made a graph of my past girlfriends.

It has an ex axis and a why axis.

One Sunday, with one hand motion, God caused the Earth to begin to revolve around the Sun. "What should we call it when it goes all the way around?" asks Adam.

"A year," God replied.

Now, he made another hand motion, and the Earth began to rotate on a tilted axis.

"What should we call it when it rotates all the way around?" Adam asks.

God sighs and takes a seat on the grass below. "Let's call it a day."

I'm making a graph on my previous exs

It has an Ex axis and a Why axis.

After Astronomers discovered the Earth rotates about an axis...

They got bored and decided to call it a day!


The US is finally flattening our COVID-19 curve!

Unfortunately, we're flattening it to the Y axis.

I just finished making a graph of all my past relationships with women

It has an Ex axis and a Why axis.

I made a chart of my past relationships

It had an ex axis and a why axis

Gabriel's Horn is a geometric figure formed by rotating f(x)=1/x about the x axis. It has finite volume, but infinite surface area.

This is the complete opposite of the Vuvuzela, which has a finite surface area, but infinite volume

Methamphetamine was used widely by both axis and allied soldiers in WW2.

Making it the true War On Drugs.

I stole this:

Me: I'm terrified of the vertical axis.
Therapist: why?
Me: (SCREAMS)


What do planets say in winter?

We're freezing our axis of.

Why do feminists dislike maths?

There's an XY axis but no XX axis.

What does the Earth do after a bad breakup?

Gets drunk off its axis.

A Frenchman and an Ethiopian got into a heated argument.

The Frenchman said, "We have better food, wine, standard of living, transportation, infrastructure, economy, and GDP than you! What do you have? Nothing!"

The Ethiopian answered, "At least we didn't surrender to the Axis!"

An Irish, a British, and American soldiers...

...had just helped each other escape from an Axis prisoner camp in WW2 Germany. As they run through the Bavarian forest, they hear alarms sounding, and soon afterwards, they hear dogs barking and guards yelling to each other.

The barking and yelling gets louder and louder, and the escapees realize that they'll be caught if they keep on running, and decide to take cover by climbing up separate trees.

The dogs start circling the tree, and jumping up and down around the trunk on the very tree the American has climbed. The guards shout "Come down or we'll shoot!" Thinking quickly, he quickly calls down "who! who!" The German guards say to each other "Das ist eine owl", and call the dogs off.

The dogs follow the trail to the second tree, and the guards call up "Come down or we'll shoot!" The Brit calls down "CAW! CAW!!!" The guards say "Ahh. Das ist eine crow".

The guards follow the dogs to the third tree where the Irishman had climbed. Again they called up "Come down or we'll shoot!" The Irishman thought for a moment and then called down "Moo! Moo!"

***NOT MINE: ** Shamelessly stolen from an Irish joke book I had as a kid. Yes, I am Irish.*

"According to relativity, time itself travels at the speed of light, but along the imaginary axis."

"i c"

I was making a graph of my past relationships. First I drew the Ex axis then the Why axis.

Full disclosure: I saw this in yik yak thought is share it here. :)

The Earth was and is still quite aggressive towards the Nazis...

As its always tilted on the Axis


My love graph has two axis.

It has an X-axis and a Y-exis.

What do you call a root vegetable that spins on it's axis?

A *rotato*...

New Theresa May joke

What would Theresa May be if she were attached to another object by an incline plane wrapped helically around an axis?


Screwed

On a plane, left or right around a vertical axis (often controlled by a rudder) is known as yaw.

But the only axis I'm on when I whip this little sky pony around the golden winds are YEEEEEEET

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes