Awareness Jokes
82 awareness jokes and hilarious awareness puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about awareness that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article explores the various awareness jokes, from breast cancer awareness to speed awareness and information security awareness. Learn about the importance of knowledge and recognition, as well as the FDA's role in cyber awareness and security awareness.
Quick Jump To
- Short Awareness Jokes
- Awareness One Liners
- Bring Awareness Jokes
- Raising Awareness Jokes
- Breast Cancer Awareness Jokes
- Speed Awareness Jokes
- More Awareness Jokes
Funniest Awareness Short Jokes
Short awareness jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The awareness humour may include short consciousness jokes also.
- So Tekashi69 could face life in prison Which is nice because we might finally get to see a mumble rapper completing a sentence
- My buddy just got a job in marketing with Kellogg's cereals... I guess you could say his job is raisin Bran awareness.
- I always ask what LGBT stands for... But i never get a straight answer.
Ps: I'm very aware of its meaning(since im very gay). - This year I'm on a crusade to tell everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes It's about raisin awareness
- I told my friend I have an acute sense of when a deep hole with water is nearby. He said thats a useless ability. I'm well aware
- Twice a year there is a newsletter released about dried fruit. On those dates it is raisin awareness of currant events.
- Redditors are very environmentally aware More than half the content on the front page is recycled
- Are you aware.... Are you aware that 80% of asians have Cataracts.
The rest drive Rincolns. - Therapist: Are you aware that you have incredible difficulty verbalizing your emotions? Man: I can't say I'm surprised.
Therapist: Exactly. - Just saw that our local Police Department got 2 huge new trucks with "Criminal Gang Unit" labeled on the sides. Finally, some self awareness.
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Awareness One Liners
Which awareness one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with awareness? I can suggest the ones about recognition and perception.
- Diarrhoea Awareness Week starts on Monday Runs until Friday.
- If you leave a grape out in the sun, it'll shrivel and dry up... Just raisin awareness
- What do you call a wolf that meditates Aware wolf
- Next week is diarrhea awareness week. Runs until Friday.
- My therapist told me I am quite self aware. I already knew that.
- What do you call a wolf that's aware of its surroundings? Awarewolf
- Only 49 states like computers... The last state isn't Dell-aware
- I taught my pet wolf to meditate. Now he's aware wolf.
- I wasnt aware that the name Niamh was pronounced Neve Until my mate Stiamh told me
- I taught a wolf to meditate Now he is aware wolf
- I absolutely adore alliteration. Amateurs aren't aware of it's awesomeness.
- I'm telling everyone about eating dried grapes… It's about raisin awareness
- 49 states don't know about computers. The last state is Dell-aware.
- Why did the wolf meditate? To become aware wolf
- September is alzheimers awareness month Did anyone else forget?
Bring Awareness Jokes
Here is a list of funny bring awareness jokes and even better bring awareness puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- There Should Be A Day For Bringing Awareness To Calling The Cops 9/11
- I'm trying to bring more attention to fried grapes I'm raisin awareness.
- October is both Cyber Security and Breast Cancer Awareness month! Therefore I'm offering a two-for-one special.
Bring your laptop to me for virus removal and receive a free breast exam! - #METOO Many adults still read the symbol # as 'pound,' not 'hashtag' so imagine their surprise to learn a movement meant to bring awareness to s**... assault and harassment was named 'pound me too,'
Raising Awareness Jokes
Here is a list of funny raising awareness jokes and even better raising awareness puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- To raise heart health awareness, Cardi B changes her name... To Cardi O
- In the window of a bar in Philadelphia Drop a bucket of Starbuck's Iced Coffee on your head to raise awareness of the rich city girls who have lost their ability to even.
- October is Eczema Awareness Month So I'm raising money by selling scratch cards.
- Scientists announced a new family fun maze covered in vantablack to help raise awareness about the new product... ...there were no survivors :/
- Chris Brown wants to raise domestic violence awareness in Australia
- People really find it hard to s**... some of the jokes in this sub. Just trying to raise awareness of joking hazard
- I'm organising an event to help raise awareness of male s**... dysfunction, particularly a failure to c**.... If you can't come, let me know.
- I spent my whole day raising awareness for the environment. Birds sure p**... at you when you attach six-pack rings to them, but man do I feel like I made a difference!
- h**...-positive activists went to africa... They give aids to african children to raise awareness.
Breast Cancer Awareness Jokes
Here is a list of funny breast cancer awareness jokes and even better breast cancer awareness puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Breast cancer awareness has pink ribbons, but what does alcoholism awareness have? Bruises.
- Breast Cancer Awareness Hotline I called the hotline for information about breast self-examination. I got a recording that said "Press one to continue.....OK, now press the other one.
- Why do bird watchers invest so much money in breast cancer awareness? Because they are greatly satisfied by seeing Tucans.
- Breast Cancer Awareness I'm quite well aware...
Speed Awareness Jokes
Here is a list of funny speed awareness jokes and even better speed awareness puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Cop: Sir, are you aware that your on your phone and speeding? Me: Well Snapchat says that I'm only going 45.
Cop: Oh sorry sir have a nice day
Amusing Awareness Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What funny jokes about awareness you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean noticing jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make awareness pranks.
In a crowded city at a bus stop, a beautiful young woman was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt, with matching tight leather boots and jacket...
As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step on the bus.
Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind and unzipped her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg.
Again, she tried to make the step onto the bus, only to discover she still couldn't!
So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind and unzipped her skirt a little more and for a second time attempted the step and once again, still she could not raise her leg because of the tight skirt.
With a coy little smile to the driver, she again unzipped the offending skirt to give a little more slack and again was unable to make the step.
About this time, a big Texan that was behind her in the line picked her up easily from the waist and placed her lightly on the step of the bus.
Well, she went ballistic and turned on the would-be hero screeching at him, "How dare you touch my body!! I don't even know who you are!"
At this, the Texan drawled, "Well ma'am normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we was friends."
An elderly man in Saskatchewan.
An elderly man in Saskatchewan had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!" The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**..., or make you get out of the pond n**...." Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."
Mental Hospital
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out. When the hospital director became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered that Edna be discharged from the hospital because she now considered Edna to be mentally stable.
The director went to Edna and said, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you're being discharged because you responded so rationally to a crisis by jumping in the pool to save the life of another patient. Your action displays sound mindedness. The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead."
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself. I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?"
A pirate walks into a bar...
With a steering wheel in his pants. The bartender notices and says "sir, are you aware you have a steering wheel down your pants?" To which the pirate replies "Arr, it's driving me nuts."
The old Man's Pond
An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years.
He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over.
He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.
He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, 'we're not coming out until you leave!'
The old man frowned, 'I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you get out of the pond n**....'
Holding the bucket up he said,
'I'm here to feed the alligator...'
Fact
I'd like to leave you ladies and gentlemen with this frightening fact: I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but if you took all the money that we in the West spend on food in one week, you could feed the Third World for one year. I'm not sure about you people, but I think we're being overcharged on groceries.
Irish sectarianism joke
An American is visiting Ireland, and walking back to his hotel from the local pub. Suddenly he hears a voice behind him, demanding, "Are you a protestant or a catholic??". The American is well aware of the sectarian issues in Ireland and is understandably afraid to admit to either affiliation. In a flash of inspiration he responds, "neither, in Jewish!". And the voice comes back, "I must be the luckiest Palestinian in all of Ireland!"
A blonde police officer pulls over a blonde driver...
"Are you aware of what you were doing?" The officer asks.
"Speeding?" "Yes, now show me your license and registration please." The driver with a puzzled look asked "What is that?" "The thing with your face on it." So the blonde driver looks through her purse and finds an eyeshadow palette with a mirror attached and shows it to the officer. "Oh, it's okay, you're a police officer."
I like my health care like I like my h**... (oc)
Cheap, and accepting of all preexisting conditions...as far as I'm aware I just made this up, be gentle
Vaccination awareness is rising
Last night I saw a young man vaccinate himself behind a dumpster
What do you call a female Chinese newborn?
A youth-in-Asia
^(Yes. I'm 100% aware I'm the worst person in history)
Donald Trump said, "I declare April as s**... Assault Awareness month."
His aide said, "So what do think are some good ways to prevent it?"
Trump replied, "Prevent it?"
One evening an old farmer went down to the pond...
One evening an old farmer went to go down to the pond, as he hasn't been there in a while, he grabbed a five gallon bucket and some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard some voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted at him "we're not coming out until you leave!" The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or get out of the pond n**...". Holding the bucket up he said "I'm here to feed the alligator."
There was once a robot whose job it was to organize all the shelves of a massive library that had thousands of books. Every day he did his job without missing a beat. One day though, he didn't show up to work. The librarians were all perplexed that a robot would do something like that...
Turns out he had become shelf aware.
I phoned the Drugs Awareness helpline today.
"Can I speak to the c**... Councillor please" I asked. "You'll have to wait" he replied,"he's on another line."
A Guy Proposing To His GF...
She interrupted him and said: but I have one flaw you should be aware of: I f**... alot! Like a lot!
He giggled and said it's alright I have a problem with my nose too, I can't smell that well.
After three days of them living together ,
The guy is opening the windows of the apartment,
And the wife is crying and shouting YOU LIED TO ME, YOU CAN SMELL!,
The guy responded: no I didn't but it is getting hard to walk around here! my eyes are burning!
A drunk guy walks out of a bar..
A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling
Back and forth. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches,
"Can I help you Sir?"
"Yessh! Ssssomebody ssstole my carrr", the man replies.
The cop asks, "Where was your car the last time you saw it?"
"It wasss on the end of thisshh key", the man replies.
About that time the cop looks down and sees the man's wiener hanging Out of his fly for all the world to see.
He asks the man, "Sir are you aware that you are exposing yourself?"
Momentarily confused, the drunk looks down at his c**... and without Missing a beat, blurts out....
"F*c**... Me! My girlfriend's gone, too!!"
Policeman: Im very sorry Ma'am, but it looks like your husband got hit by a bus.
Lady: Im aware of that sir, but John has a wonderful personality.
Why did a mathematician named his dog Cauchy?
Let me test math awareness of this sub. This was told by a professor in a class.
Answer: because it left residue at every pole!
An Irishman walks out of a pub, stumbling back and forth with a key in his hand. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches, "Can I help you lad?" "Yesh, Shombody shtole me car!",
The cop asks, "Well now, where was your car last time you saw it?" "It was at the end of this key." About this time the cop looks down to see that the Irishman's member is being exhibited for all to see. He then asks, "Are you aware that you are exposing yourself?" The Irishman looks down woefully and moans "OOH GOD... they got me girl too!"
My friend told this to me the other day, so I apologize if this is a repost or anything like that.
A man is pulled over for speeding.
Police Officer: Sir, were you aware you were going 68 MPH on a 45?
Man: No sir.
Officer: Well, you were, and that's far too high. You'll have to be in court.
Man: Well, can you at least raise the number a bit so we can get the judge to say it?
Officer: I guess I can.
\*In the courtroom
Judge: How were you going 420 on a 45?!?
I was on a diabetes awareness website...
It asked if I accept cookies. Definitely a trick question!
I was telling my children about the health benefits of eating dried fruits recently
It's really all about raisin awareness.
Today a woman was walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out.
When I got face to face with the woman, I said, "Miss, are you aware that you could be cited for indecent exposure?"
"Why?" the woman asked.
"Well," I said, "Your right breast is hanging out of your blouse."
The woman quickly looked down and screamed, "Oh my God! I left my baby on the bus!"
A boy comes home from a s**... club to find his mother waiting for him
Already aware of what her son had been doing, she asks, And what did you see, young man?
Something I wasn't supposed to.
Oh? Your father?
No, your mother.
I asked my friend if he'd give me a four letter verb that means "to be aware of"
... but that a**... kept telling me no!
Three ghosts were talking about what was keeping them from being promoted from ghoul to specter.
The first confessed, "I have a weakness for boooooooooooooobs."
The second admitted, "I drink too much boooooooooooooze."
The third said, "I lack situational awareness."
I've been telling people about the advantages of eating dry grapes.
It's all about raisin awareness.
