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Avoiding Someone Jokes

11 avoiding someone jokes and hilarious avoiding someone puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about avoiding someone that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Avoiding Someone Short Jokes

Short avoiding someone jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The avoiding someone humour may include short ignoring someone jokes also.

  1. If someone tried to make me dig my own grave I would say no. They're going to kill me anyway and I'd love to die the way I lived : avoiding manual labor.
  2. Whenever I meet someone for the first time, I avoid telling Titanic jokes because they're terrible at breaking the ice.
  3. I like to keep a gun in my nightstand drawer just in case someone breaks in That way I can shoot myself to avoid social interaction
  4. If you're looking for true love... Find someone who looks at you the way I look at anything to avoid making eye contact.
  5. Why I avoid talks about sexuality with my dad. Me: " There are genes that effect the likelihood of someone being gay."
    Dad: " Ya, especially the tight ones."
  6. The entire United Airlines incident could've been avoided... if someone had offered a Pepsi.
  7. HOBOSEXUAL A hobosexual is someone who enters into a relationship to avoid becoming homeless.
  8. My sister would make a great politician... ...she avoids directly answering questions and always leads the blame to someone else, whether she has proof or not.
  9. A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.

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Avoiding Someone Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about avoiding someone you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean running away jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make avoiding someone pranks.

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES : THESE REALLY WORK!!

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES : THESE REALLY WORK!!
 
 
 
 
 
                        1. TO AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES, GET SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.
 
 
 
                        2 TO AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT-    USE THE SINK.
 
 
 
                        3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. [REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.]
 
 
 
                        4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.
 
 
 
                        5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES - YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
 
 
 
                        6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE – OIL AND DUCT TAPE.    IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE OIL.     IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.
 
 
 
                        7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.
 
 
 
                        DAILY THOUGHT:
 
 
 
                        SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING, BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN YOU PUSH THEM DOWN THE STAIRS.

Bad News

In the Hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.
I'm afraid I am the bearer of bad news, he said as he surveyed the worried faces, The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, semi-risky, and you will have to pay for the brain yourselves.
The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a length of time, someone asked, Well, how much does a brain cost? The Doctor quickly responded, $5000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain.
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, Why is the male brain so much more?
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and then to the entire group said, It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've been used.