Avengers Jokes

Following is our collection of superhero humor and expendables one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Avengers puns for adults, dirty whedon jokes or clean daredevil gags for kids.

There is an abundance of superheroes jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 57 funniest jokes on avengers. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any ultron witze you can hear about avengers.

The Best jokes about Avengers

Thor, Iron Man and Hulk walk into IKEA...

Avengers... Assemble

The Avengers are over rated.

The Baltimore rioters destroyed half a city without any superpowers at all.

In the next Marvel movie I hear that Ironman, Captain America and the others will team up to battle Comcast .

It is called Avengers Xfinity Wars!

[Mild Infinity War Spoiler] Did you guys see Peter Dinklage in the new Avengers film?

It was his biggest role to date.

Yo Momma so fat (Avengers Edition)

Yo Momma so fat it took Thanos 2 Snaps to destroy her.


What does Mike Tyson say after a good workout with the Avengers?

I'm Thor.

After a particularly brutal battle with his fellow Avengers, Thor decides to relax at a local watering hole....

He drinks and drinks, barrels of beer and mead. After some time, he hits it off with a cute local girl and takes her back to Avengers Tower to show her his little Mjolnir.

He wakes in the morning, satisfied, and looks at the girl sleeping next to him. The poor thing is battered, with a busted lip and bruises all over her face and body. He gently shakes her awake and asks, "Are you okay?"

"Oh my god," she says groggily. "Hon, you were great, but a little rough.'

"Well, I *am* Thor!" says the God of Thunder.

***"YOU'RE*** Thor!" exclaims the girl, "I'm tho Thor i can barely thpeak!"

I was watching The Avengers with my grandpa.

He was asking me all sorts of questions about the movie such as "Who's this character?" And "What about that character?". I explained the heroes as best I could. He finally asks me "Where's Superman?" So I try to explain that too. "Superman's owned by a different company, he's owned by DC, and these heroes in this movie are Marvel characters." He replies "What? The whole world is falling apart in this movie, but Superman can't get out of his contract to help?!"

(Infinity War Speculation) When Thanos gains the mind stone, he will turn into Palpatine.

Because The Avengers will pay for their lack of Vision.

How do the fallen avengers talk to each other?

Snapchat.

When Thanos snaps...

Avengers: Oh no, he did it he managed to get rid of half the universe we did not stop him there is no hope. We are in Endgame now.

Karen: ThE VaCCinEs TurNEd My KIdS tO DuSt !!!!!


[Spoilers] I finally watched Avengers: Infinity War

It was alright. Probably give a 5/10. The first half was great, but the other half just kind of fell apart in the end.

The Avengers must love Daft Punk

They were up all night to get Loki

Why don't The Avengers drive Dodge Avengers?

Because cars like that are nothing to Marvel at.

Where was Drax in Avengers : Infinity War?

I saw his name in the credits and heard his voice sometimes, but why wasn't he in the movie?

What did Joss say on the last day of shooting the Avengers?

Whedon?

In Avengers: Infinity War, Thanos absolutely went crazy.

He snapped.

Did you see the new Avengers movie?

It was over in a snap

Why is Daredevil not a part of the Avengers?

Because he doesn't work with Visionο»Ώ


Why did all the Avengers have to get glasses?

Because they had poor Vision

Why did the Avengers have the best float at the parade?

They had a gigantic Banner!

I'll admit the Avengers had a plan

But in the end, they lacked vision.

My wife bought us an avengers puzzle to do together...

I said great. We can put some music on, have a few drinks and assemble the avengers.

I watched Avengers: Infinity War this weekend. It was definitely a good movie, but one question was left unanswered, and it keeps me up at night.

I'll never be able to figure out why is Gamora.

Why do the Avengers keep calling Spiderman over to fix their computer?

Because they heard he's a web developer

Who makes the music for the Marvel movies?

The Avengers Ensemble.

That last avengers movie..

Was over in a snap.

2018 is the Year of the sequel.

Deadpool 2, Avengers Infinity war 3, Incredibles 2, World War 3.

When Scarlett Witch was at the Avengers HQ...

you could say she needed...adult super Vision.

Did you hear about Avengers: Infinity Wars?

It's said to be Marvel-ous!

I dreamed about who dies in the upcoming Avengers movie...

...it was a side kick, Vision.

Why America failed to save the world from Coronavirus



Thor is in Asgard

Ironman died

Captain is now old

Hulk doesn't have much power. Rest of the Avengers are suffering from Corona and China ate Spiderman and Batman.

Warning potential Avengers Age of Ultron Spoilers. What is Captain America's shield made out of?

-Vibranium

-What's Hawkeye's shield made out of?

-Quicksilver

Avengers

The journey isnt watching the movie.
Its getting their before somebody spoils it for you.

My Evangelical friend is boycotting the Avengers movies, because they feature a trans gender super hero.

Confused, I asked him what he meant, and he replied "because Tony Stark loves to turn into a Fe-male."

Which one of the Avengers would hurt the most if he shrank down in size like Ant-Man?

Thor. Because he would be a little Thor.

I like how avengers infinity war has perfect balance

[Thor gains his vision back but scarlet witch loses hers](#s)

You are lying in the hospital thinking that you have got a small fever.

Then the full crew of Avengers comes to visit you.

What does Captain America say when he wants an orchestra?

Avengers, ensemble!

I was pretty surprised to see the ending to the first Avengers movie...

Loki didn't see it coming.

Yo mama so fat

The avengers hired her for her ability to be everywhere at once!

Why is the villain of Avengers: Infinity War so good at tracking Infinity Stones?

Because he's good at smelling... he's The Nose.

Marvel just announced the title of the Infinity War sequel. [spoiler]

Avengers: Days of Future Past

The avengers walk into a bar

Except vision. He phased.

My son thinks it's unfair that he has to wait 24 more days until Christmas...

I told him "yeah? Try waiting for the Avengers 4 trailer then..."

What do the Avengers call it when they win a fight without the Hulk?

A Banner Day!

My weekend was like the movie The Avengers

Loki

If you watch the trailer for Avengers: Endgame every day...

... Tony Stark will always have one more day of oxygen.

Why would the Avengers have been better able to see a solution to the infinity war if Thanos had arrived just a couple of years later?

They'd have had 2020 Vision


(I'm so sorry)

Sex with me is like the latest Avengers movie

There's always a bunch of nice guys who hate the fact that Im the one to split it in half

The civil war between superheroes started because the avengers had no supervision.

They only had a regular Vision.

What do the Avengers do at the end of Infinity War 2?

Take a Wakanda beach.

I'm going to cash in on the success of Avengers: Infinity War by opening a comics themed sandwich shop.

It'll be called *Soup or Hero*

There's a heavy riot across US..

Trump administration undecided who to call, Avengers or Justice League.

Thanos was struggling to gain infinite wisdom

So, one day he goes to one of the strongest avengers alives, Vision, and he says,

"Hey, can I pick your brain?"

Why batman wasn't in the avengers.

You need parents permission to join.

Edit I know that he is dc im using him for the sake of the joke its just a joke I'm not implying that they're the same universe (even though bruce wayne is a millionaire in new york jtlyk)

How do the Avengers buy all their green screen?

They buy it in Hulk

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes