Author Jokes

Funniest Author Short Jokes

Short author jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The author humour may include short writer jokes also.

1. My author friend claims that he 'accidentally' glued himself to his autobiography, but I don't believe him. But that's his story, and he's sticking to it.
2. Have a turkish joke A prisoner goes to the jail's library to borrow a book. The librarian says: "We don't have this book, but we have its author"
3. Last night I dreamed I was the author of The Lord of the Rings. I've been Tolkien in my sleep.
4. Authorities close investigation on the group of hipsters found dead in a pond last week. Turns out they were ice skating before it was cool.
5. A hole has been discovered in the fence that surrounds a nudist camp. Authorities are looking into it.
6. A mathematician, a college professor, and a textbook author walk into a bar. *[The punchline is left as an exercise for the reader.]*
7. Thinking of changing my name to Authorized Personnel Imagine the places I could go with a name like that.
8. Did you hear about the lego truck that crashed on the highway? Authorities are still trying to piece everything together...
9. I'm pretty sure God is a Black Woman Who else would be a single parent whose Son was killed by the authorities under suspicious circumstances?
10. Authorities fear that the collapsed bridge in Genoa was made with 'mafia' concrete..... ....they've found 6 more bodies than there were people missing.

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Author One Liners

Which author one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with author? I can suggest the ones about editor and avatar.

1. How does the author of harry potter get down a hill? By walking. JK. Rolling
2. What is the highest religious authority among oranges called? The Pulp.
3. A man with authority walks into a bar... Orders everyone a round
4. What's an author's favorite drink? Tequila Mockingbird.
   (Yes I know it's horrible :P)
5. What if Thor become Gold Thor? He will become an Author.
6. Do you know about the Chinese author who wrote a million page book? It was Wei Tu Long.
7. Someone stole all the toilet seats at the station! Authorities have nothing to go on.
8. Which Science-Fiction author is the best source of liquid mercury? HG Wells.
9. What is it called when a novelist has joint pain? Authoritis
10. What author could write the best book on extracting mercury from the earth? Hg Wells
11. What do you call a female author? paige Turner
12. Why doesn't the bible have an "about the author"? It was written by a holy-ghostwriter
13. Too many authors to cite? No problem et al.
14. Which Russian author never paid his respects? Dusty F Key
15. Author Unknown "A tree never hits an automobile except in self-defense."

Books And Author Jokes

Here is a list of funny books and author jokes and even better books and author puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A man recently took an author to court after he was sold a book that only contained five words. He received a short sentence.
• Turkish Joke A prisoner goes to the warden and asks for a book. The guard makes a phone call then says:
  We don't have the book but we have the author across the hall.
• Read a book about gay marriage in Ireland The authors' names are: Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald.
• Turkish gallows humor A prisoner goes to the prison library, and asks for a specific book. The guard tells him, "we don't have that book... but we do have the author."
• Breaking Celebrity News! Academy Award winning Actor, Simmons, and children's book Author, Rowling, eloped earlier today. JK
• What happens when the God Of Thunder starts writing books? He becomes an author.
• Did you hear about the author who writes using invisible ink? Here's a list of his books:
• In Turkey, a prisoner goes to the prison library and asks for a book. The librarian answers Unfortunately, we do not have the book here. But the author.
• I just got done writing a book! I think I have authoritis...
• Did you hear about the author who wrote a book during her time of the month? It was a period piece.

Book And Author Jokes

Here is a list of funny book and author jokes and even better book and author puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What book are you reading? Some new Danish author.
• What did they rename the Norse god of lightning after he turned into gold and began writing books? Author
• This book of incantations is useless. The author failed to run a spell check.
• The author of the book "Childish Retorts" died today. RIP Ewan Whosarmy
• Breaking News: Criminal author gets 5 years in book case Check out his story!
• I just finished reading a book about preventing skin injuries and burns... The author classified the book as "non-friction"
• What happens if you write too many books? What?
  You will get author-itis.
• I appreciate it when authors decide to go for an embossed cover on their book It's always a nice touch
• Several clergy have co-authored a new book. Its titled, "Ministers Do More Than Lay People"
• The author of the Harry Potter books was trying so hard to be funny. But it wasn't funny to me. J.K. I was Rowling

Author Name Jokes

Here is a list of funny author name jokes and even better author name puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Authorities have released the name of the United passenger from yesterday's incident Soo Yoo
• A range of alcoholic drinks is being produced named after famous authors .... Dickens Cider is proving very popular
• What author has two toys an ev and a sky in his name? Dostoyevsky
• If I was an author I would make my pen name... *Page Turner.*

Bad Author Jokes

Here is a list of funny bad author jokes and even better bad author puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What do a bad author and a grave robber have in common? They both create a lot of plotholes.

Hilarious Fun Author Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about author you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean creator jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make author pranks.