Author Jokes

Funniest Author Short Jokes

Short author jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The author humour may include short writer jokes also.

1. Have a turkish joke A prisoner goes to the jail's library to borrow a book. The librarian says: "We don't have this book, but we have its author"
2. Last night I dreamed I was the author of The Lord of the Rings. I've been Tolkien in my sleep.
3. Authorities close investigation on the group of hipsters found dead in a pond last week. Turns out they were ice skating before it was cool.
4. A mathematician, a college professor, and a textbook author walk into a bar. *[The punchline is left as an exercise for the reader.]*
5. Thinking of changing my name to Authorized Personnel Imagine the places I could go with a name like that.
6. Did you hear about the lego truck that crashed on the highway? Authorities are still trying to piece everything together...
7. Authorities fear that the collapsed bridge in Genoa was made with 'mafia' concrete..... ....they've found 6 more bodies than there were people missing.
8. Doctor of death! Impressively, only 2% of the people I operated on died last year. But for some reason the authorities think that's too high for a dentist.
9. If you see a monk going door to door selling flowers in your neighborhood, call the authorities immediately. Because only YOU can prevent florist friars.
10. I caught my neighbor attaching a rocket engine to a deer, so I immediately reported him to the authorities... Shame on him for trying to make a quick buck!

Share These Author Jokes With Friends

Author One Liners

Which author one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with author? I can suggest the ones about editor and avatar.

1. What is the highest religious authority among oranges called? The Pulp.
2. A man with authority walks into a bar... Orders everyone a round
3. What's an author's favorite drink? Tequila Mockingbird.
   (Yes I know it's horrible :P)
4. What if Thor become Gold Thor? He will become an Author.
5. Do you know about the Chinese author who wrote a million page book? It was Wei Tu Long.
6. Someone stole all the toilet seats at the station! Authorities have nothing to go on.
7. Which Science-Fiction author is the best source of liquid mercury? HG Wells.
8. What is it called when a novelist has joint pain? Authoritis
9. What author could write the best book on extracting mercury from the earth? Hg Wells
10. What do you call a female author? paige Turner
11. Why doesn't the bible have an "about the author"? It was written by a holy-ghostwriter
12. Too many authors to cite? No problem et al.
13. Which Russian author never paid his respects? Dusty F Key
14. Author Unknown "A tree never hits an automobile except in self-defense."
15. What happens when the God Of Thunder starts writing books? He becomes an author.

Books And Author Jokes

Here is a list of funny books and author jokes and even better books and author puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A man recently took an author to court after he was sold a book that only contained five words. He received a short sentence.
• Read a book about gay marriage in Ireland The authors' names are: Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald.
• Breaking Celebrity News! Academy Award winning Actor, Simmons, and children's book Author, Rowling, eloped earlier today. JK
• Did you hear about the author who writes using invisible ink? Here's a list of his books:
• In Turkey, a prisoner goes to the prison library and asks for a book. The librarian answers Unfortunately, we do not have the book here. But the author.
• I just got done writing a book! I think I have authoritis...
• Did you hear about the author who wrote a book during her time of the month? It was a period piece.
• What book are you reading? Some new Danish author.
• What did they rename the Norse god of lightning after he turned into gold and began writing books? Author
• This book of incantations is useless. The author failed to run a spell check.

Book And Author Jokes

Here is a list of funny book and author jokes and even better book and author puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• The author of the book "Childish Retorts" died today. RIP Ewan Whosarmy
• Breaking News: Criminal author gets 5 years in book case Check out his story!
• I just finished reading a book about preventing skin injuries and burns... The author classified the book as "non-friction"
• What happens if you write too many books? What?
  You will get author-itis.
• I appreciate it when authors decide to go for an embossed cover on their book It's always a nice touch
• Several clergy have co-authored a new book. Its titled, "Ministers Do More Than Lay People"
• The author of the Harry Potter books was trying so hard to be funny. But it wasn't funny to me. J.K. I was Rowling
• Why are there no clowns in the Lord of the Rings books? The author considered it, but realized that the introduction of such a character would be only a Tolkein Jester.
• What do you call a teeth specialist who writes books? An author-dontist
  Wahey!
• Heard about the gay author? His new book will be coming out soon.

Author Name Jokes

Here is a list of funny author name jokes and even better author name puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Authorities have released the name of the United passenger from yesterday's incident Soo Yoo
• A range of alcoholic drinks is being produced named after famous authors .... Dickens Cider is proving very popular
• What author has two toys an ev and a sky in his name? Dostoyevsky
• If I was an author I would make my pen name... *Page Turner.*

Bad Author Jokes

Here is a list of funny bad author jokes and even better bad author puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What do a bad author and a grave robber have in common? They both create a lot of plotholes.

Hilarious Fun Author Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about author you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean creator jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make author pranks.