The Best 73 Auschwitz Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Auschwitz jokes. There are some auschwitz poland jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these auschwitz ovens puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Auschwitz Jokes and Puns

What's the worst place to run in to your ex girlfriend?


My grandpa died in Auschwitz

He fell down from the watchtower.

What is the best formula for leaving Auschwitz?

Lenght of chimney x wind speed

Auschwitz joke, What is the best formula for leaving Auschwitz?

What do you call gingers in Auschwitz?

Concentrated Orange Jews

What did Hitler say when he heard that the Allies were winning?


My grandfather was killed at Auschwitz :(

He fell out of the guard tower shooting at the Jews.

What did Hitler say from heaven when the Russians took over Auschwitz

Stop it that's Mein Kampf!

Auschwitz joke, What did Hitler say from heaven when the Russians took over Auschwitz

I was expelled from school for masturbating in the showers

The teachers said I ruined the trip to Auschwitz

I'm getting really sick of all the Holocaust jokes...

My great grandfather died at Auschwitz, so I find these jokes really offensive. Granted, he fell out of a guard tower and broke his neck, but I think that still counts.

Why did so many jews die at Auschwitz?

Because the exit doors were coin operated.

Does anyone know why my friends are so shocked to find out my Grandfather survived Auschwitz?

I mean, most German officers did, right?

You can explore auschwitz dustpan reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean auschwitz gulag dad jokes. There are also auschwitz puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Caffeine makes me so gassy...

... so I think Auschwitz to decaf

How good are the showers at Auschwitz?

They're to die for.

How do you get to Auschwitz from Berlin?

You have to take the Third Reich.

Worst day ever!


What's the best hotel in the world?

Auschwitz. 1.3 million stars.

Auschwitz joke, What's the best hotel in the world?

What did the train say on the way to Auschwitz?


I've started up a chip shop in Auschwitz.

I called it "Arbeit Macht Fries".

What would Germans call a painfully offensive joke?


>say ouch when offended or in pain

>Witz is the German word for joke

>sounds like auschwitz

Whats a mile long and has a thousand arms?

The train to Auschwitz.

Some German guy i used to play Path of Exile with told it to me.

I don't know why people are surprised when I tell them my Grandfather Made it out of Auschwitz.

Most of the German officers did.

What do you call it when a Jewish person has an idea in Auschwitz?

Shower thoughts

What is the most successful hotel?

Auschwitz, 6 million stars.

Jews rated their trip to auschwitz

It was one star

What was Adolf Hitler's campaign slogan?

*"Auschwitz the old, in with the Jews!"*

Dark jokes Saturday: What is the most offensive brand name you can come up with? Winners get gold!

My contribution:

"Auschwitz" air freshener.

What's the best campsite in the world?

Auschwitz, received well over three million starts

Did you hear that Auschwitz had to ask visitors to stop playing Pokemon Go?

They got tired of people pretending to be Ash.

I heard that Auschwitz had to ask people to stop playing Pokemon Go.

Which is weird, because they have the same slogan.

Gotta catch 'em all.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. My great grandfather died in Auschwitz.

He fell off of a watch tower.

My friend got caught wanking in the showers on a school trip.

It really ruined the tour around Auschwitz.

What do you call a Nazi's concealed weapon?

Auschwitz blade!

The men's group at my synagogue took a trip to see Auschwitz.

They all gave it one star.

A 9/11 widow, a black slave, a jew who survived Auschwitz and a clairvoyant walk in to the Challenger Spacecraft

"I don't like where this joke is going" says the clairvoyant

People should really stop making jokes about major tragedies. My grandpa died in Auschwitz...

He fell off a watchtower

Did you know Auschwitz has the highest hotel rating?

1.1 million stars

How do you pickup chicks in Auschwitz ?

With a dustpan..

The Romans once said "All roads lead to Rome"

Much like how the Nazi's said "All railroads lead to Auschwitz"

I don't understand why people are in awe when I tell them my grandfather survived Auschwitz.

Most of the other German officers did too!

My friends David reviewed Auschwitz on Tripadvisor...

..he gave it a star.

A friend of mine got caught masturbating in the showers.

It completely ruined our class trip to Auschwitz.

Could you guys not make jokes about the holocaust here? My grandfather died in the holocaust, and it's really offending me.

He fell out of one of the guard towers at Auschwitz

A German and a Frenchman walk into a bar.

After buying the German a beer, the Frenchman asks where his is from.

"Auschwitz," the German replies.

"Is it weird living there, especially with its history?" The Frenchman asks.

"Yes, but the services are incredible."

"Oh really?"

"Yes. Cheap gas and free showers."

The Auschwitz-Birkenau Museum released a PSA that visitors were not allowed to play Pokemon GO!

Because they didn't want people pretending to be Ash

Hitler asks a jewish kid...

Hitler wants to hear the dreams of jewish kids. So, he visits Auschwitz and finds one kid sitting in a corner, freezing to death.

"Hallo kinder, what is your dream?"

"Herr Hitler, when I grow-"

"IF..IF you grow up."

I used to brag to my grandson about how many girls I picked up at Auschwitz.

He said it doesn't count since I used a dust pan and brush.

What Gives Me Uncontrollable Gas?


(I played this hand in CAH <3)

What did the Jews rate their stay at Auschwitz?

One star.

What's the best thing about going to Auschwitz?

Plenty of seats on the train ride home.

How do you catch chicks in auschwitz?

With a dust pan

What Do You Call a Fight Between Auschwitz Prisoners

Star Wars

How do you pick up a girl from Auschwitz?

With a dust pan

So many jokes about the Holocaust but how would you feel if your grandparent died in Auschwitz?

My grandad did, he fell off the guard tower.

Concentration camps are not a matter to joke about! People died there and it is not funny. My Grandpa died in Auschwitz

He fell from the guard tower

My grandfather died at auschwitz

He had a heart attack after he saw the gift shop prices.

My great-grandfather died in Auschwitz.

My Grandfather died in Auschwitz

Poor guy fell out of the guard tower

Could someone explain the joke from "The Counterfeiters"

\-Why isn't God in Auschwitz? ..He didn't make it through the selection process.

My grandfather was a Holocaust survivor and made it out of Auschwitz alive.

Then again, most of the Waffen SS did.

What do you call the oompa loompas at Auschwitz?

Concentrated orange jews.

NSFW I can't stop thinking about how thoughtful the nazis were

Just think of all the baby showers they threw in Auschwitz

My grandfather did not come back from Auschwitz.

Turned out he got a permanent job.

Did you know that Auschwitz was good for the health?

Everyone quit smoking.

Where can I shop the largest shoe collection?

Oops, I think Auschwitz to the wrong sub...

What do you call a hot shower in Auschwitz

A gas stove

I couldn't fine dark jokes... I'm sorry

It's a well-known fact that the slogan at the entrance of Auschwitz was the cynical "Work sets you free". Now historians discovered what the sign at the exit read:

"Hot surface, do not touch."

My grandfather helped Jewish families to escape from Auschwitz via the sewers.

He was always cleaning the ovens with water.

Why Wasn't God in Auschwitz?

He couldn't make it past the selection.

What's the difference between a car crash and Auschwitz?

In a car crash you get mangled.

In Auschwitz you get Mengele!

The witches in Sabrina the Teenage Witch having a cat called Salem is like...

A Jewish family having a cat called Auschwitz.


What Germans buy before going on a night out

An old holocaust survivor dies and goes up to heaven....

He asks God,

"How do you get a girl's number in Auschwitz? Roll up her sleeve."

God doesn't laugh.

The Jew shrugs and says, "Eh. I guess you had to be there to understand".

My teacher caught me masturbating in the shower.

Totally spoiled our excursion to Auschwitz.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the auschwitz camp jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working auschwitz holocaust piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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