Aunts Jokes
31 aunts jokes and hilarious aunts puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about aunts that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Aunts Short Jokes
Short aunts jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The aunts humour may include short auntie jokes also.
- What did grandma and grandpa do before there was Internet? I mean, didn't they get bored?
I asked my 32 uncles and aunts, but they didn't know either. - What mom loves... Son: Mom, why is my cousin's name rose?
Mom: Well son, your aunt really loves flowers!
Son: Mom, what do you love?
Mom: Richard, stop asking so many questions! - I hate it when my aunts and grannies come up to me at weddings and say "You're next." So now I just do the same to them at funerals.
- My spinster aunt thinks that statue of Jesus on the crucifix in only a loincloth is too revealing, so she has started covering them in appropriate clothing. ...aparently, she's a cross-dresser now.
- Some evil scumbag has just broken into my 87 year old Aunts house and stolen her limbo dancing trophy. Seriously, how low can you get.
- My aunt's parrot can say over 30 phrases, but each one is offensive and belittling. I say parrot, it's actually more of a mockingbird.
- Apparently Canada banned trans fats today... I don't really mind, but I wonder what my Aunt John is gonna do...
- Jon Snows going to feel itchy during the GOT season finale! What else would you expect with aunts in your pants?
- Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poke me in the ribs and say "You're next! You're next!" They stopped when I started doing the same at funerals.
- My mom's sister was telling me she forgot a bunch of basic math... Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally
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Aunts One Liners
Which aunts one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with aunts? I can suggest the ones about aunt uncle and uncle.
- My aunt's star sign was cancer, pretty ironic how she died She was eaten by a giant crab
- Why is Jon Snow so ticklish? Aunts in his pants...
- My transgender uncle is a superhero... We call him Aunt-Man.
- My aunt always said the slow and steady win the race She died in a fire
- What do you call an incestuous nephew? An aunt-eater.
- Two of my mom's sisters moved to the Alaskan wilderness. it's a double aunt tundra
- What is a four-letter word for a woman that ends in "unt"? Aunt.
- Who's Donald Trump's least favorite family member? Aunt Tifa.
- My aunt is a Jew. And a holocaust denier. We call her Auntie Semite
- What did aunt jemima say when she ran out of pancakes? Oh how waffle!
- My Uncle John is hosting a gender reveal party Sorry, I mean my Aunt Jane.
- In the 5th month of every year, my aunt let's her pigs in the field.... It's mayham!
- Who's a penguins favourite family member? Aunt arctica
- What's a four letter word describing a female that ends in -unt? Aunt
- Aunt Millie's secret recipe has been stolen by Sara Lee's brother. Alleged Lee.
Comical & Quirky Aunts Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about aunts you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean untie jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make aunts pranks.
I hated weddings as a kid
When I was younger,I had to attend many a wedding with my parents. Every single time, my aunts and other older relatives used to poke me with a smirk and tell me "You're next.".
They only stopped after I started doing the same thing with them at funerals.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like Grandpa did..
..not screaming in panic like Grandma and my two aunts who where in the car with him.
Obesity runs in my family.
An obese woman goes to the doctor. The doctor prescribes diet and exercise. The woman says, "Doctor, you don't understand. My mother is obese. My father is obese. My sister is obese. My brother is obese. My aunts are obese. Obesity runs in my family. " The doctor replies, "It sounds like nobody runs in your family."
Little Johnny
An insurance officer comes to a farm and meets Little Johnny and asks,
"Hello, are your parents home by any chance?"
Little Johnny: "My parents were run over by the tractor ..."
Insurance officer: "Really? That's awful! Are your siblings at home?"
Little Johnny: "Run over by the tractor ..."
Insurance officer: "Oh my God! That's terrible! Are your grandparents or your uncles or aunts or any of your relatives at home?"
Little Johnny: "No! All of them run over by the tractor ..."
Insurance officer: "What are you doing all day then?"
Little Johnny: "Drive the tractor!"
Why doesn't Jesus have any aunts?
Because they'd be antichrists.
As an unmarried man, my aunts used to ask me "and, are you the next one?" at every wedding...
...that quickly stopped when I started to ask them the same question at funerals
"What did grandpa and grandma do for fun back in the day?"
i don't know why but this question was never answered by anyone from my 17 aunts and uncles.
My old aunts would come and tease me at weddings
My old aunts would come and tease me at weddings, Well Shashank? Do you think you'll be next?
.
.
We've settled this quickly once I've started doing the same to them at funerals.
People ask me how I have so many cousins, aunts, uncles, sisters and brothers.
I respond with It's all relative
Why was Jon Snow itchy?
He had aunts in his pants
