Audit Jokes

Following is our collection of tax humor and examine one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Audit puns for adults, dirty income jokes or clean irs gags for kids.

There is an abundance of assessment jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 19 funniest jokes on audit. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any circumcisions witze you can hear about audit.

The Best jokes about Audit

The blonde's password

During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password: "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento"
When asked why such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.

I auditioned for a musical about the periodic table

I got the lead role!

So these two ladies die

and are waiting in purgatory to hear the results of their life audit. A door opens and two men walk in. An angel walks in with an ugly, hunch backed gremlin of a man. The angel says "Nancy, in 1982 you killed a duck, your punishment will be to spend your eternal life with this man". He slaps the the shackles on each of their arms and are sent off for eternity. A little while later another angel walks in with a gorgeous hunky stud. He slaps the shackle on her and the handsome man and are sent on their way. During their walk shes thinking she must have be a good person during her life on earth, when she's interrupted by the man's muttering "I shouldn't have killed that duck".

What to Wear

A man, called to an audit by the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. 'Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper.'

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. 'Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie.'

Confused, the man went to his rabbi, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma. 'Let me tell you a story,' replied the rabbi. 'A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. 'Wear your most sexy negligee, with a V neck right down to your navel.'

The man protested: 'What does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?' The rabbi responded: "'No matter what you wear, you are going to get screwed"

I auditioned for a TV show for people with broken bones.

I didn't make the cast.

What's the difference between an IRS audit and prison rape?

In prison, you have a chance at getting a reach around

I auditioned to be on "The Biggest Loser"...

They told me "you win"

I auditioned to be on the remake of "Snow White"

but i was turned away as i wasn't on the short list

An Auditor was found sleeping with his client

He was guilty of inside her trading

I tried to audition for a movie about emos

but I didn't make the cut

Sherlock Holmes faced a tax audit because...

all his clever deductions made the tax office very suspicious.

At the IRS audit

IRS: According to your tax return you claim got money for nothin' & checks for free.

Taxpayer: Am I in trouble for that?

IRS: We'd say you're in dire straits.

Two auditors came to my house today.

I said I wouldn't pay them taxes because my money was my own.

Then they told me it was all the irs.

Was auditioning a gutiar player for my thrash metal band the other day and he gave me his phone number.

His number was (000)-000-0000.

I auditioned for a role in Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Unfortunately, I was a white male.

What do auditioning for an acting role and playing sports have in common?

If you break a leg, you get cast

I tried to audition for the part of a tree in a school play...

But they told me my acting was wooden.

Want to get an idea how important you are during a government shutdown?

IRS REFUND department: Non-essential
IRS Audit department.: Essential

Where do auditors go to do their time?

The house of corrections.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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