Attract Females Jokes
21 attract females jokes and hilarious attract females puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about attract females that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Attract Females Short Jokes
Short attract females jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The attract females humour may include short attracted jokes also.
- What did the male magnet say to the female magnet? Seeing you from the back, I thought you were repulsive. But seeing you from the front, I find you rather attractive.
- What did the male magnet tell the female magnet? When I saw your backside I was repelled, but now that I see your frontside I am very attracted
- What's a female ghost's most attractive feature? Her BOO-bies!
>!Oh come on, it's funny...!< - A dumb billionaire walks into a bar and orders a pint. The female bartender notices how attractive he is and slips him her number on a tissue. " Preposterous! I could get laid for this much!"
- Why was the male caterpillar attracted to the female caterpillar? She always gave him butterflies!!
- Law of attraction to females If I had a nickel for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
- I went to an extremely attractive female doctor today for my annual checkup. She told me that I had to quit m**.... I asked why and she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you."
Share These Attract Females Jokes With Friends
Attract Females One Liners
Which attract females one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with attract females? I can suggest the ones about males females and opposites attract.
- How does a male farmer win the heart of a female farmer? Attract her.
- The only females I attract... are mosquitoes
- What do male Jews say when they see an attractive female? Challah at your boy
Fun-Filled Attract Females Jokes to Boost Your Mood
What funny jokes about attract females you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean lure jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make attract females pranks.
My attractive female neighbor is completely paranoid.
She thinks I'm following or even stalking her, she is worried that I may be obsessed with her and any time she hears a noise in her house she is...purified? Oh, wait: petrified. Sorry, it's not easy reading a diary through binoculars from a tree.
A forbidden love
"I'm in love with one of my sheep," the nervous young man told his psychiatrist.
"Nothing to worry about," the psychiatrist consoled. "Many people are fond of animals. As a matter of fact, my wife and I have a dog we are very attached to."
"But, doctor," continued the troubled patient, "I feel physically attracted to my sheep."
"Hmmmmm," observed the doctor. "Is it male or female?"
"Female, of course!" the man replied curtly. "What do you think I am, GAY?"
A man was in his front yard mowing grass, when his attractive blonde female neighbor, Judy, came out of her house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mail box, and again opened it and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"
To which she replied, "There certainly is! My s**... computer keeps saying, YOU'VE GOT MAIL."
A bear is chasing a rabbit, when a fairy interrupts him
"I am a magic fairy, and if you promise not to kill each other, I'll grant you each 2 wishes."
the bear says "I wish I was the most attractive bear in the world!"
and the bear becomes a beautiful, handsome, gorgeous lady bear magnet.
the rabbit says: "I wish I had a motorcycle"
so the rabbit gets a nice rabbit-sized motorcycle.
the bear then says "I wish all the other bears in the world were female!"
and all the bears in the world become female.
the bear than looks at the rabbit:
"you look so s**... on a motorcycle."
so the rabbit says:
"for my second wish, I wish this bear were gay"
A rabbit and a bear are walking down a road
when they found a genie's lamp. After rubbing it, a genie popped out and told them that they each get three wishes.
"I want every woman in the world," the bear asked first.
" I want a helmet," said the rabbit.
" Actually, I wish for every attractive female in the universe," the bear said for his second wish.
"I also want a motorcycle," asked the rabbit.
" No, I want every beautiful women that had ever existed," the bear said for his final wish.
The rabbit, already revving up his motorcycle, added: "I wish the bear was gay," and drove off.
A guy walks into a hospital and sees a really attractive female with brunette hair sitting down.
And sits right next to her to make conversation.
Guy:Hi, What are you here for?
Girl:I am donating blood.
Guy:How much are they giving you for your blood?
Girl:$50 for a pint, what about you? why are you here?
Guy:Oh, I am donating s**....
Girl: Cool, how much are they giving you?
Guy:$300
Girl:Wow *surprised/shocked face*
Then the two go there separate ways. The next day the female walks into the hospital and sits next to the same guy she met yesterday and the guy says "Are you donating blood?"
And the girl whose mouth cheeks are puffed up shakes her head no
A joke I heard from a regular customer.
A professor turned up to the class with two rats in a cage..
The professor showed a large cage with a male rat in it.
The rat was in the middle of the cage.
Then, the professor kept a piece of cake on side and kept a female rat on the other side.
The male rat ran towards the cake and ate it.
Then, the professor changed the cake and kept some bread.
The male rat ran towards the bread.
This experiment went... on with the professor changing the food every time.
And, every time, the male rat ran towards the food item and never towards the female rat.
Professor said:
This experiment shows that food is the greatest strength and attraction.
Then, one of the students from the back rows said:-
"Sir, why don't you change the female rat....?
She may be his wife!!"
Blonde + Computer = ?
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.
She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house.
A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again.. Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"
To which she replied,"There certainly is!"
"My s**... computer keeps saying, **'YOU'VE GOT MAIL!'**"