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Atoms Jokes

140 atoms jokes and hilarious atoms puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about atoms that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Discover the lighter side of science with hilarious jokes about atoms and other particles. If you're looking for a laugh as you brush up on your chemistry knowledge, this is the article for you.

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Funniest Atoms Short Jokes

Short atoms jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The atoms humour may include short atomic jokes also.

  1. Two atoms were walking down the street. One of them said, "I lost an electron." The other one said, "Are you sure?" and the first one said, "I'm positive!"
  2. Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar, followed by Batman. NaNaNaNaNaNaNaNa NaNaNaNaNaNaNaNa BATMAN!
  3. 39 digits of pi accurately calculates the circumference of the universe to the width of a hydrogen atom Scientists still can't determine how much is needed for your mother though
  4. An atom walks into a bar… Bartender: What are you doing here?
    Atom: I'm celebrating the loss of an electron.
    Bartender: I'm keeping my ion you.
    Atom: Don't worry, I'll keep things positive.
  5. Two atoms bump into each other. 2 atoms bump into each other. One says, "I think I lost an electron" The other asks,"Are you sure?"
    To which the first replies, "I am positive"
  6. Two atoms walk into a bar. The first one turns to the other and says "I think I've lost an electron!"
    The second one goes "Are you sure?"
    To which the first one replies "I'm positive."
  7. A merchant told another "I'll trade you a barium atom and two sodiums for that weight measuring device." "BaNaNa for scale?"
  8. How Does Uranium Atom Say Good Bye....? GOTTA SPLIT
  9. What fish is made out of two sodium atoms? 2 Na
  10. One atom says to another atom "Dude! I lost all my valence electrons!"
    "Are you sure?"
    "I'm positive!"

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Atoms One Liners

Which atoms one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with atoms? I can suggest the ones about particle and chemistry.

  1. 12 atoms of sodium walk into a bar. Followed by Batman.
  2. An atom loses an electron... It says, "man, I really gotta keep an ion them."
  3. Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar… followed by Batman.
  4. what kind of fish is made up of 2 atoms only? 2Na
  5. Why can't you trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
  6. What kind of fish is made of only two sodium atoms? 2 Na
  7. What fish is made of 2 sodium atoms? 2Na
  8. Hey girl, is your atomic number 11? Because you're sodium fine.
  9. Why isn't energy made of atoms? It doesn't matter
    (go ahead and down vote :P)
  10. What do you call a ring of iron atoms? A ferrous wheel.
  11. Three helium atoms walk into a bar HeHeHe
  12. What's another name for the Periodic Table of element? The atoms family.
  13. That one about the three helium atoms is pretty funny. HeHeHe
  14. Don't ever believe anything an atom says. They make up everything.
  15. Two Helium atoms were acting funny HeHe

Hydrogen Atoms Jokes

Here is a list of funny hydrogen atoms jokes and even better hydrogen atoms puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did the oxygen atom in tuxedo say to the hydrogen atoms? Bond, Covalent Bond
  • Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar One says, "I've lost an electron."
    The other says, "Are you sure?"
    The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
  • How do hydrogen atoms find a new leader? They hold an *electron*.
  • A Hydrogen atom suddenly exclaimed: "I think I just lost my electron!" "Are you sure?" Asked its friend,
    "Yes" replied the first, "I'm positive."
  • A Hydrogen atom walks into a bar... ...and asks for a shot.
    Bartender, "what's the occasion?"
    Atom, "I think I lost an electron."
    Bartender, "you sure?"
    Atom, "I'm positive."
  • Hydrogen atom walks into a bar and says to the barman: Have you seen an electron? I've lost mine"
    Barman:"You sure?"
    H.A.: "I'm positive"
    Yeah..sorry 'bout that.
  • Explaining what is hydroxyl acid to an atom... Hydrogen ion: OH^- I get it, it is water!
  • Two hydrogen atoms are at a party and bump into each other. The first one says, "Hey, grab that electron, it's mine!" "How do you know?" asks the second. "'Cause I'm positive!" the first replies.
  • Why is Helium more Catholic than Hydrogen? Because it has more atomic MASS
  • What happened when two hydrogen atoms collided? The doctor had to heal-ium.

Sodium Atoms Jokes

Here is a list of funny sodium atoms jokes and even better sodium atoms puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What follows 16 Sodium atoms into a bar? Batman.
    Explainer:
    The chemical symbol for sodium is "Na." The Batman television show theme is: "Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na, Batman!"
  • What did the chlorine atom say to the sodium atom? I've got my ion you.
  • Which fish is made out of 2 atoms of sodium? Tuna
  • What do you call 2 sodium atoms in the ocean? tuNa
  • Fish composed of 2 sodium atoms? 2Na
  • A Sodium atom walked into a Bar. Bartender: How may I serve you today?
    Sodium: Nothing special just the basic stuff
    Bartender: OH...
    Sodium: Yes.
    >!NaOH is a Basic Chemical!<
  • What do you call a fish made of only two sodium atoms? 2 Na
  • What do you call 2 sodium atoms? TuNa.
  • A sodium atom undergoes a vigorous reaction with flourine... How do you feel?" Asks the fluoride ion.
    "Positively shell shocked" the sodium ion replied.
  • The Creation Of Sodium Sodium, atomic number 11, was first isolated by Humphry Davy in 1807. A chemical component of salt, he named it Na in honour of the saltiest region on earth, North America.
Atoms joke, The Creation Of Sodium

Science Atoms Jokes

Here is a list of funny science atoms jokes and even better science atoms puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I Really Don't Like Atomic Science Honestly, It's Such A Bohr.
  • Q: Why shouldn't you take atoms seriously?
    A: Because they make up everything.
  • Q: Why are atoms Catholic?
    A: Because they have mass.
  • Atoms are like science deniers. They make up the universe.
  • Science at its finest. Why are all subatomic particles gay?
    Because they are all atoms
  • Scientists did not in fact slipt the atom, Chuck Norris just roundhouse kicked it.
  • Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
  • Chuck Norris can split the atom.
    With his bare hands.
  • Two hydrogen atoms are at a party and bump into each other. The first one says, "Hey, grab that electron, it's mine!" "How do you know?" asks the second. "'Cause I'm positive!" the first replies.
Atoms joke

Comical Atoms Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land

What funny jokes about atoms you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cells jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make atoms pranks.

So 2 atoms were walking down the street...

One suddenly says: Oh no, I think I lost an electron!
The other one asks: Are you sure man?
He says: Yes, I'm positive.

Two atoms are sitting at a bar...

...and the first atom is looking pretty glum.
"What's wrong?" asks the second atom.
"I thnk I lost an electron."
"My God!" said the second atom. "Are you sure?"
"Yes," said the first. "I'm positive."

Why should you distrust atoms?

Because they make up an awful lot of stuff.

Why are atoms known for being such liars?

oh, they make up EVERYTHING!

Two atoms walk into a party at the Large Hadron Collider...

It was full of nerds so they split.

So three Hahnium atoms walk into a bar,

HA HA HA

Two atoms were hanging out...

...and one says to the other, "Oh no! I think I've lost an electron!"
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first says, "Yes, I'm positive!"

two atoms are talking..

"Hey Bob, why the long face?"
"I've just lost an electron."
"What, are you sure?"
"Yes..... I'm positive."

Two atoms were crossing the road...

...when the first atom screams "Ahhhhh! I lost an electron".
The second atom asks "Are you sure?"
to which the first atom replied "Yes, I'm positive."

What do you do with dead atoms?

Barium

Why did the atoms cross the road?

It was time to split.

Two atoms bump into each other, and become stuck.

"Oh, no," said the first atom. "We're going to be stuck like this forever!"
"It'll be okay. Try not to be so negative! Think positive for a second."
The first atom thought real hard, and the two flew apart.

Two Helium Atoms Are Bonding.

HeHe

If your atoms had no kinect energy you'd be 0K.

Two atoms are walking down the street...

Two atoms are walking down the street together. The first atom turns and says, "Hey, you just stole an electron from me!"
"Are you sure?" asks the second atom.
To which the first atom replies, "Yeah, I'm positive!"

A joke my kid told me today.

Him: dad guess who is the smallest family in the world?
Me: I don't know, who?
Him: the atoms family.
Not bad for 7 years old.

Atoms are all liars...

They make up everything!
Credit to wherever my awesomely lame chemistry teacher finds her corny jokes :)

what do you call 6.02 X 10^23 atoms of avocado dipping sauce?

one guacamole

What did the scientist say when he found 2 helium atoms?

HeHe

A chemist walks into a bar...

He says to the bartender, "Tonight all drinks are on me!"
The bartender says to him, "you must've had a good day today, what happened?"
"I finally found a way to make a stable molecule from a barium atom, two sodium atoms, and a sulfur atom!" the chemist proudly replies.
"Wow," says the bartender, "that's BaNaNaS!"

What did the oxygen atom say to the two hydrogen atoms?

Man! This t**... is getting me wet!

So my bf and I walk into a bar. We notice this guy kept hitting on the female bartender by telling her corny jokes as she fake chuckles.

One joke involved him asking her why no one trusted atoms. (Because they make up everything). My bf retaliates with his own joke... 'What do female bartenders like most about their male Patrons?.... Just the tip' 😎

Two atoms are walking together...

One of them says:
Oh, no, I think I lost an electron.
The other replies, Are you sure?
The first says, Yes, I'm positive.
*This is an oldy all over the internet, but very cute.*

What superhero consists of only 16 atoms?

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BATMAN!!

Two atoms

One atom says to the other, "you're a weird dude. You know that?" The other atom responds "hey man, we all have some quarks."

Why are atoms so serious?

Because they're no laughing matter.

What do you get when you mix an atom of cobalt, an atom of vanadium, and two atoms of iron?

covfefe

You would think that atoms bonding would mean they're being friendly to eachother

But instead they steal each others electrons.
How ionic.

Why are atoms bad story tellers?

Even though they are great at making things up, they always ending up Bohring me to death

Can you move my atoms closer together?

You'd be doing me a real solid.

2 scientists see atoms for the first time.

Scientist 1: So everything is made up of these tiny particles?
Scientist 2: I guess so.
Scientist 1: What should we call the things they make up?
Scientist 2: Why name it? It doesn't seem that important to me.
Scientist 1: Are you sure? Cause I think it all Matters.

Two atoms come back after fishin'

But they don't come back after fusion.

Two atoms sitting in a bar..

One says I lost an electron. The other asks are you sure ?
Yeah I'm positive

What do you call a nitrogen atom having a 5-way o**... with 4 other hydrogen atoms?

Ammoooaaanium

All the atoms go to the bar Quantum Accelerator

Why? Because it's a smashing time

Two atoms are walking down the street....

One of them shouts, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"
The other inquires, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm positive!"

Two atoms are driving together, lose control and smash into a tree...

ATOM #1: are you ok?
ATOM #2: oh my god, no! I think I lost an electron!
ATOM #1: are you sure?
ATOM #2: yes, I'm positive!

-Two atoms walking down the street

Two atoms walking down the street happen to collide into one another. The first one exclaims, "Oh no! I think I've lost an electron!" 
"Are you sure?" says the second atom. 
"Yes, I'm positive!"

Why do all of the carbon atoms in benzene get along so well?

They learned to just let pi bonds be pi bonds.

Two hydrogen atoms and an oxygen atom had a t**......

Made me so wet.

You shouldn't trust atoms..

they make up everything.

Who's your favourite Canadian music icon that also practices advanced culinary technique which enhances the flavour of poultry at the atomic level?

Brine Atoms

Two atoms are in a bar

One said to the other,' I just lost an electron'
'Are you sure?' Was the reply
'Yes, I'm positive'

Two hydrogen atoms are walking down a street

All of a sudden, one stops and says oh my goodness I've lost my electron! The other turns to him and says are you sure to which the first replies yeah! I'm positive!

Atoms are catholic.

They have mass.

why don't scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything

Two atoms are in a bar. One says, "I think I lost an electron."

The other says, "Are you sure?" to which the other replies, "I'm positive."

What do atoms and black lives have in common?

They matter

Two atoms are walking back home together...

One of the atom stumbles and falls
Atom: ouch, I think I just lost an electron.
Atom 2: are you sure?
Atom: I'm positive.

Did you know that atoms never touch each other. And since we're made of atoms, we've never touched anything in our entire lives.

So to answer your question officer, no I did not punch that kid.

Do you know why we can't trust Atoms?

They make up everything

Two atoms go on a date...when suddenly, one of them drops an electron and gasps. The other atom asks...are you sure?

I'm positive! Replies the other atom.

There are two lithium atoms walking along, and one says to the other,

Phil, I think I lost an electron back there.
So Phil says, Really Jason, are you sure?
And Jason replies, Yeah, I'm positive!

I was putting atoms together for chemistry. Until I put magnesium and oxygen together.

o**...

Scientist: We've discovered a clump of atoms that has no sense of humor.

Me : You've got to br kidding.
Scientist : This is no laughing matter.

Two hydrogen atoms decide that they want to ride on the Large Hadron Collider.

They jump on a plane to Switzerland and sneak in while no one is looking. As they start to speed up one of them realises that they have both lost their electrons. It mentions it to his friend who asks "Are you sure?"
It replys "I'm positive."

You can't trust atoms.

They make up everything!

What do you call a scientist who splits atoms to create bubbly beverages?

A nuclear fizzicist.

Ionic humor

Two atoms are walking down the street. One suddenly says, I just lost an electron.
The other is concerned. Are you sure?
I'm positive!

Two atoms are talking and one says "I think I lost an electron."

The other atom says "Are you sure?" The first atom replys "Yes, I'm positive!"

Why don't scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

\*Ba dum tssss\*

Three Dad Jokes for Father's Day

* I was wondering why this frisbee kept looking bigger and bigger. Then it hit me.
* Why can't you trust atoms? They make up everything.
* Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar. That can't just be a coincidence.

Never trust atoms; they make up everything.

say less...

Stand up Comedy on Star Trek

Yo mamma so fat… she tried to use the teleporter, but it ran out of atoms before she made it to the other side

Atoms joke, Stand up Comedy on Star Trek

jokes about atoms