Giggle-Inducing Atlanta Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
Bud and Jim were a couple of drinking buddies...
who worked as airplane mechanics in Atlanta. One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.
Bud says, "Man, I wish we had something to drink!" Jim says, "Me too. Y'know, I've heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz. You wanna try it?" So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane h**... and get completely smashed.
The next morning Bud wakes up and is surprised at how good he feels. In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects. Nothing! Then the phone rings... It's Jim.
Jim says, "Hey, how do you feel this morning?"
Bud says, "I feel great. How about you?"
Jim says, "I feel great, too. You don't have a hangover?"
Bud says, "No, that jet fuel is great stuff -- no hangover, nothing. We ought to do this more often."
"Yeah, well there's just one thing..."
"What's that?"
"Have you f**... yet?" "No....."
"Well, DON'T, 'cause I'm in PHOENIX!!!"
The score at the end of the 3rd quarter last night was 56-0.
Atlanta felt so bad about what they were doing to the Bucs that they walked off the field at the start of the 4th.
4 plays later Tampa Bay finally scored.
For you Atlanta Ga folks
Welcome to Decatur, where the men are men and so are the women.
Welcome to Midtown, where the women are women and so are the men.
So I hear there is a rule about not ending sentences with a preposition.
A snobbish English teacher was sitting in an Atlanta airport coffee shop waiting for her flight back to Connecticut, when a friendly Southern belle sat down next to her.
'Where y'all goin' to?' asked the Southern belle.
Turning her nose in the air, the snob replied 'I don't answer people who end their sentences with prepositions'.
The Southern belle thought a moment, and tried again. 'Where y'all goin' to, b**...?'
A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder
The barman says "hey, where'd you get that?" The parrot says "Atlanta, they got 'em all over the place."
l**... build huge mansion in atlanta...
It was all tounge and groove, not a single stud in the house.
(Construction workers joke, you might not get it)
BB&T Atlanta Open Atlanta Live 2015,
$LIVE$…Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) Online
Why do Pandas have such a hard time mating in captivity?
Because all of their broads are in Atlanta
The last time a group of New Englanders destroyed Atlanta this badly
Sherman marched to the sea
Golden State Warriors "No one can choke harder than we did."
Atlanta Falcons "Hold my beer."
You can explore atlanta mechanics reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean atlanta seattle dad jokes. There are also atlanta puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
New Job Opening!
Atlanta Falcons Defensive Coordinator
No experience needed!
Falcons return to Atlanta tomorrow
Guess the walking dead will be back sooner than we thought
Overtime is a curse word in retail.*
*And the Atlanta Falcons.
The Atlanta quarterback should become a baseball pitcher...
He's great at throwing.
I went to the Atlanta Falcons locker room to get some change for a dollar...
But they only gave me 3 quarters.
Did you hear Atlanta is getting a new mascot?
Hillary Clinton
Whom did the Boston Strangler choke last?
The Atlanta Falcons.
You know, I don't find the recent super bowl win all that historic...
After all, this isn't the first time Atlanta was burned by the north.
Adele requested and got a reset/restart on her song at the Grammy because she messed up
The Atlanta Falcons would also like to replay the 4th Quarter of the Superbowl
What's the difference between a dollar bill and the Atlanta Falcons?
A dollar bill is good for 4 quarters.
Heard about the I-85 highway collapse in Atlanta
It's the biggest collapse they've had since the Super Bowl :(
Hey United, my ex is flying flight 2145 from Atlanta to San Antonio, seat 12-D...
Do your thing!!!
In the US people drive on the right side of the road,
but here in Atlanta we drive on what's left.
"Atlanta" star says season2 shooting begins this year -News
Chicago PD and local gangs in unison yelled back, you are half a year late wannabes.
Agent: "Welcome to Delta, can I help you?"
Passenger: "Hi, I'm going to Boston. I'd like this bag sent to Miami, and this one to Atlanta."
Agent: "I'm sorry, but we can't do that sir."
Passenger: "Really? Because you did it last week..."
Credit to /u/SilverbackBob
On retaliation of removing Confederate monuments, some authorities around the country are beginning to remove African American monuments
Just this morning, Atlanta removed the Georgia Dome!
It snowed 2" in Atlanta today...
Go to Google Maps. Go to Atlanta. Click on the Traffic overlay.
What is the worst day to be a fan of the Atlanta Falcons?
March 28th
What's the difference between The Atlanta Falcons and a dollar?
You can get four quarters from a dollar.
my friend bought tickets for the super bowl Llll on February 3rd 2019 in Atlanta not realizing that it is also the day of his marriage. so if someone is interested
The church is in Rochester, the womens name is Clarissa
The Cleveland Indians and the Atlanta Braves were both eliminated from the playoffs on Columbus Day.
And the r**... might lose too.
What do the Atlanta hawks and a bad powerlifter have in common?
They both have a weak bench.
Job Opportunity for Flat Earthers
Because of the recent Arctic cold snap. Delta Airlines has been hiring de-icers in their Atlanta hub for the expected crowds at SuperBowl. Most of the jobs have been going to Flat Earthers, because by definition, they don't believe in *Global* Warming but are fine with Plane Warming.
Why Did the Super Bowl s**...?
Of course the Super Bowl is going to be dull; what do you expect when you bring Pepsi to a big party in Atlanta?
I have a friend in Atlanta who was arrested for s**....
His lawyer was so good he got it knocked down to following too closely .
How will you know if you die of the Delta variant of COVID?
On your way to heaven or wherever, you'll make a stop in Atlanta.
*
Why is Atlanta hard to find on a map?
Because it's area code is 404
A Sea Lion escaped from the Atlanta Aquarium...
I heard they had to re-seal the tank...
Baseball
A Braves fan walks into an Atlanta bar and spots a guy wearing a New York Yankees cap. Drinks for everyone here, bartender! shouts the Braves fan. Except for Mr. Yankees!
The Yankees fan smiles and says, Thank you!
Infuriated, the Braves fan orders another round of drinks for everyone except Mr. Yankees, who, again, thanks the man. This goes on for a while, until Mr. Braves asks the bartender, What's the matter with that guy? I've ordered rounds of drinks for everyone but him, and all he does is thank me. Is he nuts?
No, he's not nuts, says the bartender. He owns the place.
