Athletic Jokes
43 athletic jokes and hilarious athletic puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about athletic that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Get ready for a good laugh with these hilarious athletic jokes! This article is packed with funny jokes about athletic training, athletic directors, supporters, soccer and more! Whether you're an athlete, coach, or a sports fan, you're sure to enjoy these light-hearted jokes about the world of athletics.
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Funniest Athletic Short Jokes
Short athletic jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The athletic humour may include short good athlete jokes also.
- Kanye said he is an intellectual who doesn't read books. Which I get because I am an athlete that rarely moves.
- North Korea is participating in the olympics this year, but they won't win. Because all of their athletes that can run jump or swim are in south korea
- Got the best compliment from my doctor today He said I had athlete's foot. I've only been training for 3 days so didn't think anyone would notice
- Why do the athletes sweat a lot more at these Olympics than at the last ones? There are no fans. (I'll let myself out)
- Olympics, the new tower of Babel The German Olympian
I met an athlete near the Olympic Park
I asked him "Are you a Pole Vaulter"?
He said "No, I'm German...
and how do you know my name?"
- I met an olympic athlete yesterday... 'Are you a pole vaulter?' I asked.
'No' He replied. 'I'm German, but how did you know my name was Walter?' - My gf told me I should not say anything about her friend's right lazy eye When I met her friend I complimented her on how athletic her left eye was
- America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole day.
- I am totally not a racist but... Compared to all the others types of races, I think the 400 meter hurdles present the most barriers for track athletes.
- I'm trying to decide if I should become an athlete or a criminal So I made a list of pros and cons.
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Athletic One Liners
Which athletic one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with athletic? I can suggest the ones about sporting and athlete.
- Which athlete was the first to take a knee? Tonya Harding.
- Never date a girl that plays tennis They may be athletic, but love means nothing to them.
- If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get? Missile toe.
- Say what you want about Russian Athletes But their training regimen is pretty dope
- If athletes get athlete's foot, what do candy makers get? Tic tac toe
- How many armed men does it take to extort an Olympic athlete? A Brazilian.
- Who was the first person to take a knee at an athletic event? Tonya Harding.
- Why couldn't the athlete listen to music? Because she'd broken the record
- Who are the least romantic athletes? Tennis players.
Love means nothing to them. - What do French athletes wear? Jaques straps
- What do you call an athlete doing drugs ? A Speed runner
- If I had to box a professional athlete. I would choose a soccer player.
- Rio is full of liars, cheaters, thieves, and drug abusers. And that's just the athletes.
- What do you call a white guy on steroids? An athlete
- What is round and helps against athlete's foot? A landmine.
Athletic Training Jokes
Here is a list of funny athletic training jokes and even better athletic training puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why doesn't Cuba have a soccer team? All their athletes are training for distance swimming.
- Why doesn't Kevin Spacey win first place in marathons? He isn't an athlete and doesn't train for marathons
Athletic Competition Jokes
Here is a list of funny athletic competition jokes and even better athletic competition puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- An athlete walks into a bar And gets eliminated from the high jump competition
- You have the body of a professional athlete If competitive eating can be considered a sport
Athletic Supporter Jokes
Here is a list of funny athletic supporter jokes and even better athletic supporter puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Please Give Generously to your High School Gym Program! Be an athletic supporter!
- Why is an athletic supporter like a bag of chips? You open it and it's half empty.
Cheerful Athletic Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about athletic you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean artistic jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make athletic pranks.
Apparently, someone has been shot with a starter p**... at the athletics track.
Police think it was race related.
h**... wasn't a very athletic man.
He never even finished a single race.
You can paint a thousand paintings and not be called an artist...
You can run a thousand marathons and not be called an athlete...
You can cook a thousand meals and not be called a chef.
But as soon as you kill ONE PERSON...
Three guys are talking about their families (likely a re-post)
Three men - Bob, Joe, and David - are bragging about their families. Bob and Joe are Catholic, and David is m**....
Joe says "I've got four athletic daughters. One more and I'll have a championship basketball team."
Bob responds "I've got eight athletic sons. One more and I'll have an all-Anerican baseball team."
David answers "I've got five beautiful wives. One more and I'll have a golf course."
What does nascar stand for?
Non-athletic-sport-centered-around-r**...
People often rank a person's attractiveness out of ten, but what is considered a ten in some states would be considered differently elsewhere.
For example an NY10 is typically tall and athletic but a DC10 is very plane.
Best read out loud
I was walking past my local athletics track when I saw a man carrying a very long, thin bag. I asked him "are you a pole vaulter?"
He said "Nein, I am German, but how did you know my name was Walter?"
This new girl joined our soccer team
I was amazed, she was exactly what we wanted
She was tall, she was athletic, her legs were long, she wasn't fragile and she was extremely good with her hands
The moment I saw her I knew,
She's a keeper.
Two pregnant women are talking about their future babies
"I feel like my girl will be an athlete, she kicks so much in there it's unbelieavable!"
"Oh, I'm sure mine will be a comedian."
"How can you be so sure?"
"You wouldn't get it. It's an inside joke."
Walter.
I was in the park the other day and saw a guy practising his athletic trials, with a long metal stick for the Olympics. I asked if he was a pole vaulter, and he replied "Nein, I'm German. How did you know my name was Walter?"