Athlete Jokes

Funniest Athlete Short Jokes

Short athlete jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The athlete humour may include short fighter jokes also.

1. Kanye said he is an intellectual who doesn't read books. Which I get because I am an athlete that rarely moves.
2. Got the best compliment from my doctor today He said I had athlete's foot. I've only been training for 3 days so didn't think anyone would notice
3. Why do the athletes sweat a lot more at these Olympics than at the last ones? There are no fans. (I'll let myself out)
4. Olympics, the new tower of Babel The German Olympian
   I met an athlete near the Olympic Park
   I asked him "Are you a Pole Vaulter"?
   He said "No, I'm German...
   and how do you know my name?"
   
5. My gf told me I should not say anything about her friend's right lazy eye When I met her friend I complimented her on how athletic her left eye was
6. America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole day.
7. I'm trying to decide if I should become an athlete or a criminal So I made a list of pros and cons.
8. My date accused me of lying on my Tinder profile, but what I wrote was absolutely true. I DO have the body of an Olympic athlete. It's buried in the backyard.
9. The average paid athlete weighs more than the average felon As you can see, the pros outweigh the cons.
10. I am undecided on whether should I be an athlete or a criminal so I made a list of pros and cons.

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Athlete One Liners

Which athlete one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with athlete? I can suggest the ones about trainer and sports.

1. Which athlete was the first to take a knee? Tonya Harding.
2. Never date a girl that plays tennis They may be athletic, but love means nothing to them.
3. If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get? Missile toe.
4. Say what you want about Russian Athletes But their training regimen is pretty dope
5. If athletes get athlete's foot, what do candy makers get? Tic tac toe
6. How many armed men does it take to extort an Olympic athlete? A Brazilian.
7. Why couldn't the athlete listen to music? Because she'd broken the record
8. Who are the least romantic athletes? Tennis players.
   Love means nothing to them.
9. What do French athletes wear? Jaques straps
10. What do you call an athlete doing drugs ? A Speed runner
11. If I had to box a professional athlete. I would choose a soccer player.
12. What do you call a white guy on steroids? An athlete
13. What is round and helps against athlete's foot? A landmine.
14. Professional female athletes are tasty because they're chick contenders
15. What is Cardi B's athletic sister's name? Cardi O

Good Athlete Jokes

Here is a list of funny good athlete jokes and even better good athlete puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What did the judges say about the Russian athlete that lost a race? "Well, at least he Putin a good effort."
• Why are unvaccinated children such good athletes? Because they can catch anything
• Why did Hillary put an Australian athlete on her ticket? She needed a good running mate.
• How is a track and field athlete like an American soldier? They're both good at using javelins.
• What do you call an athlete that smells good? D. O. Durant
• Why does France have lots of track athletes? Because they are good runners.

Great Athlete Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

What funny jokes about athlete you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean player jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make athlete pranks.