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Assumption Jokes

19 assumption jokes and hilarious assumption puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about assumption that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Are you looking for a laugh? Read this collection of hilarious assumption jokes! From broken assumptions to the Assumption of Mary, these jokes will have even the most stoic of moderators cracking a smile. Each joke is succinct and positive - a perfect mood-booster!

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Funniest Assumption Short Jokes

Short assumption jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The assumption humour may include short assume jokes also.

  1. Whenever I go out, I always wear a stethoscope. That way, in the event of a medical emergency, I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions.
  2. People say I make too many assumptions. I mean, they don't say it, but I know they're thinking it...
  3. When it comes to the topic of body dysmorphia and gender assumptions, i'm not a fan. Infact I identify more closely to an air conditioning unit.
  4. How many points does it take to draw a curve? According to my engineering professor, just one, but you need to list your assumptions.
  5. Well thats the plan Exam : Clearly state your assumptions
    Me : Assume i've written the correct answer, thank you
  6. Assumption Y'know, when Oscar Pistorius said he took a shot in the dark, I really didn't expect that

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Assumption One Liners

Which assumption one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with assumption? I can suggest the ones about taken for granted and acceptance.

  1. The first rule of Assumption Club is ...well, we all know what it is, don't we?
  2. Welcome to the Assumption Club I think we all know why we are here.
  3. You should never generalize women. It's wrong to make broad assumptions.
  4. You know what they say about assumptions, right? They say that they are generally wrong.
  5. KenM agrees that something is a risky assumption Big "if", true
  6. My wife thinks I'm cheating on her. It's affair assumption.
  7. My friend told me the Kardashians had big butts. I called him out for the assumption.
  8. Well at least now we know that Colonel Fitts was correct in his assumption.
Assumption joke, Well at least now we know

Silly & Ridiculous Assumption Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter

What funny jokes about assumption you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean expectations jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make assumption pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

My top 3 assumptions when doorbell rings:

1. m**... 2. Police telling me everyone is dead 3. That book I ordered about positive thinking

A duck and a laptop go to a bar and, after a while, the bartender asks the duck if he'd like the drinks on his bill

The laptop scolds the bartender for making such an assumption and insists that the drinks be put on his tab

Assumption joke, How many points does it take to draw a curve?