Assignments Jokes

Following is our collection of psychology humor and assign one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Assignments puns for adults, dirty enroll jokes or clean responsibilities gags for kids.

There is an abundance of wrote jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 10 funniest jokes on assignments. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any work witze you can hear about assignments.

The Best jokes about Assignments

A minister and a lawyer at the pearly gates.

A minister and a lawyer arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter greeted both of them and gave them their room assignments.

"Pastor, here are the keys to one of our nicest efficiency units. And for you, sir, (to the lawyer) the keys to our finest penthouse suit."

"This is unfair!" cried the minister.

"Listen," Saint Peter said, "ministers are a dime a dozen up here, but this is the first lawyer we've seen."

Three childhood friends sign up for the army

And it's their first day, time for assignments.

The drill Sergeant asks the first one. "WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DO?"

"I like to go sailing!" he replied.

"OK, YOU ARE NOW IN CHARGE OF BOATS!"

The second friend stood up for his turn, and was asked the same question. "I like to fly..."

"OK YOU ARE NOW IN CHARGE OF OUR PLANES!"

The third friend came up and was once again asked what he liked to do. However, he had a stutter so all he could say was "I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I"...

The drill sergeant looks at him and replies, "OK, YOU ARE NOW IN CHARGE OF THE MACHINE GUNS!"

I work as a spy for the US government.

One of my more deadly assignments involved going after a mad scientist in Italy. I was having dinner with one of my contacts over some delicious cheesy rigatoni. Then, out of nowhere, I was hit by a shrink ray and tossed into my food with the sound of evil laughter. Fraught by the perils of steaming hot carbs around me, I knew that for now, escape would have to be my mission.

Mission in pasta bowl.

Studies suggest that parents can do 1/3 of their kids' math assignments

However, they struggle with the other 3/4

Reading between the lines.

1 Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found

2 hard at work at his desk. He works independently, without

3 wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never

4 thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and always

5 finishes given assignments on time. Often he takes extended

6 measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee

7 breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no

8 vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound

9 knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be

10 classed as an asset employee, the type which cannot be

11 dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be

12 promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be

13 executed as soon as possible.

Addendum:
That idiot was standing over my shoulder while I wrote the report sent to you earlier today. Kindly re-read only the odd numbered lines.


It's that time of year again...

A female student goes to a male professor and says "I would be willing to do ANYTHING to get a good grade"

The professor replies "Anything?"

The student suggestively replies, " Yes, anything!"

The professor says "Good! Come to class, hand in assignments on time and study!"

A teacher goes into the principals office and tells her that a student of his, Karen, wasn't doing any assignments and sat idle throughout the class.

The principal calls Karen into his office and before he has a chance to speak she says,"Why am i in trouble? I did nothing!"

My notebook got wet in the rain and I lost most of my school assignments.

On a side note, I still managed to save a few of them.

Group Assignments

Person: I have an Idea

Me: So Did Hitler

I hate it when people complain about getting an A or B on assignments

I mean, seriously, I could go to a gay pride event because of how many D's I get

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes