Assembly Line Jokes
17 assembly line jokes and hilarious assembly line puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about assembly line that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Assembly Line Short Jokes
Short assembly line jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The assembly line humour may include short production line jokes also.
- I work on a two-person assembly line of dracula toys... I've got to make every second count
- why do automotive line workers like the 1st Amendment. It gives them the right to assemble.
- Did you know that America auto manufacturers name their cars on the assembly line? Yours should say Check Engine under the speedometer.
- My life was so boring until I managed to get a job on a sofa assembly line I found it settees factory
- There's a rumor that Steve Jobs, has been a Buddhist, has been reincarnated as a factory worker on a sweatshop assembly line in China.
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Assembly Line One Liners
Which assembly line one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with assembly line? I can suggest the ones about parallel line and assembly.
- [Pun] Why did Henry invent the assembly line? He couldn't a-Ford not to.
*bad-dum tish* - If you show me an Italian assembly line... I'll show you a well oiled machine.
- People who sew in an assembly line Have their work cut out for them.
Silly & Ridiculous Assembly Line Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter
What funny jokes about assembly line you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean standing in line jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make assembly line pranks.
Two elves are winding down in the North Pole bar after a long day of making toys.
After downing some shots of peppermint schnapps, the first elf says to the second, That COVID outbreak in China has really messed up the toy production schedule. I don't think Santa has ever pushed us so hard! .
The second one added, Yeah, things were so bad today that Rudolph and Blitzen were even called in to work on the assembly line.
The first one got an odd look on his face and said, Well, that explains why those Raisinets I found on the floor tasted so strange.
First Day On The Job
Steve just got a job at the beverage factory and is getting a tour from the manager on his first day. The manager spends this time explaining the different assembly lines.
"Over here," the manager says, "is the lemonade assembly line. we take the product, package it up and prepare it to ship. To the right we're canning juice concentrates. On this side we have the soda line, bottles and cans and such."
"Wow, you guys produce a lot of drinks," says Steve.
"You bet, name a drink and we probably have an assembly line for it."
"Do you have a punch line?"
"Nope."
Blonde working at tickle me Elmo factory
A blonde has been looking everywhere for a job. But as soon as she shows up for interviews they see she's blonde and they don't hire her. Finally she goes to a tickle me Elmo factory,tells the boss her plight and he decides to hire her. He tells her what to do and she starts her shift. A few hours later the boss gets complaints that the assembly line has slowed down. He goes to see what the problem is and he see that the blonde has been putting to marbles between each of the tickle me Elmo's legs. Stunned the boss asks the blonde what she is doing. She says I'm just doing what you told me to do. The boss shakes his head no no no,I told you to give them two test tickles..
The most trustworthy knight
A king is about to set out on a journey far away from his home, and must leave his wife behind, but is worried about her faithfulness. He asks the local blacksmith to create a chastity belt that will keep his wife faithful, and so the blacksmith gets to work right away. The blacksmith brings the king a set of metal undergarments with a lock in the back, and a large hole in the front. The king asks why the blacksmith would leave a hole in such a spot. The blacksmith proceeds to get a short stick, and place it in the hole. Immediately, the end of the stick is chopped off by a blade within the hole. The king is impressed, so he leaves on his way after giving the undergarments to his wife. On the day the king returned, he assembled all of his knights in a line, and told them to drop their pants, in order to see who had tried to have their way with his wife. To his displeasure, the king saw that all down the line, every knight had lost his member to the blade, with the exception of one. The king congratulated the knight on his trustworthiness, and asked that he be made the new general in his army. The knight simply shook his head. The king asked again, and again the knight simply shook his head. Confused, the king asked the knight why he refused to accept such an honor, only to have the next knight in line turned to the king and say, "Forgive him, your majesty, he has had trouble speaking since his tongue was chopped off."
Tickle Me Elmo
A new employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory. The personnel manager explains her duties, and tells her to report to work promptly at 8:00 AM.
The next day at 8:45AM, there's a knock at the personnel manager's door. The assembly line foreman comes in and starts ranting about this new employee.
He says she's incredibly slow, and the whole line is backing up. The foreman takes the personnel manager down to the factory floor to show him the problem.
Sure enough, Elmos are backed up all over the place. At the end of the line is the new employee. She has a roll of the material used for the Elmos and a big bag of marbles. They both watch as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles, and starts sewing the little package between Elmo's legs.
The personnel manager starts laughing hysterically. After several minutes, he pulls himself together, walks over to the woman, and says, "I'm sorry, I guess you misunderstood me yesterday. Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles."
My grandma Edna had to get a job...
...so she applied and was hired at the toy factory where they make Tickle-Me Elmo dolls. She was led to her station near the end of the assembly line where the foreman told her what was expected of her.
A couple hours later, the foreman came back to check on her. He stood behind her and observed as she meticulously folded two marbles into a small piece of cloth. Then, using a needle and thread, she stitched the folded cloth between the legs of a newly assembled Tickle-Me Elmo doll. Then she placed the finished doll into a bin for packaging. The foreman quietly watched with a growing expression of puzzlement on his face as Edna repeated this process several times.
Finally, the Foreman's eyes lit up with understanding. He placed his hand on her shoulder and said "No, Edna. I told you to give each doll two... test... tickles."