The Best 35 Asian Guy Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Asian Guy jokes. There are some asian guy jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these asian guy puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Asian Guy Jokes and Puns

I was holding a door open for this asian guy and he said "sank you".

I punched him square in the jaw, how dare he bring up pearl harbour like that.

Currency trading

I used to trade currency. this asian guy came in and wanted to exchange 10,000yen - I gave him $120.

a week later he came in with another 10,000yen - I gave him $105.

a week after that he came in with another 10,000yen - I gave him $135.

the guy said to me in an annoyed voice " why one week $120, then $105, then $135! - why the difference?!!?"

I says to him "fluctuations"

He responds "fluck you white people"

I just held the door open for an Asian guy. He said, "Sank you," so I punched him in the face.

I can't believe he brought up Pearl Harbor like that.

Given the terms crab , tuna , lobster , and Chinese guy caught in an avalanche of boulders , which does not fit?

Ans: tuna . The other 3 are crushed asians.

An asian asks for help at an airport...

Asian: "why is my plane late? It said it would be here at 6:30."

Airplane help guy: "fluctuations."

Asian: "fluck you americans too."

Flight back home

Guy was boarding a plane to go back home from a business trip.

As he was boarding another passenger asks him: "our flight looks full what do you think they will do??"

The Asian man flying back home says "beats me"

An Asian guy walks into

An Asian guy walks into the New York City currency exchange with 2000 yen and walks out with $72. Next week he walks in with 2000 yen and gets $66. He asks the lady why he gets less money this week than last week. The lady says "Fluctuations". The Asian guy storms out, and just before slamming the
door, turns around and says: "Fluc you Amelicans too!"

So the Asian guy from the Human Centipede has a Twitter account...

He's not very popular though. He only has two people following him.

I was holding a door open for an Asian Guy.

I was holding a door open for an Asian Guy.

Once he went though, He said, 'Sank you'.

I Swore at him and kicked him in the Shin.

I Then said, 'Never bring up Pearl Harbor like that'

I held a door open for an Asian guy

and he said "sank you" so i punched him in the face. Serves him right for bringing up Pearl Harbor like that.
PS: Happy 4th of July

What do you call an Asian guy with a video recorder?

Phil Ming.

You can explore asian guy reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean asian guy dad jokes. There are also asian guy puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I asked an Asian girl for her number

She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"

I said, "Wow.."

Her friend said, "She meant 6663629".

Found this joke on Facebook, so I thought I'd share with you guys :)

An Asian, an American, and a European walk into a bar.

They sit down at the table, and decide to hit up some drinks.

American: I'll have a Coke! I don't want to get drunk.

European: I'll have a watery rum! I'll stay up for the drive.

Asian: I'll have 3 bottles beer, and a side of whiskey!

The American and the European are astonished!! The European asks the Asian why he ordered all of that alcohol.

Asian: Isn't it obvious? You guys won't let me drive anyway.

I went to my favorite bar last night.

A Chinese guy sits down next to me. I ask him "hey, do you know karate or some other martial art"? He says "why, because I'm Asian"? I said "no, because you're drinking my beer".

Today, I saw a black guy wave to an Asian from across the street. It gives me hope for the future...

Rush Hour 4!

Asian guy goes to a eye doctor

After the checkup the doctor says "The problem is you have a cataract" then the Asian guy responds with"No I have a tesra"

What do you call an Asian guy in a lift.

You shouldn't call him names.
It's Wong on so many levels.

How do you know if a guy has an asian wife?

He'll tell you.

To the guy with the friend who dates Asians....

Maybe he just needs some time to re-orient himself?

What do you call an Asian guy that always shows up before he needs to?

Earl Lee

What do you call a guy dumped by his Asian girlfriend?


Asian guy goes into bank to check on his million dollars!!!

Asian: why do I only have 999 900 dollars instead of 1 million dollars

Bank teller: Fluctuations

Asian: Fluck you too.

An Asian guy, Hispanic guy, white guy, black guy and their pilot are on a plane...

Suddenly the plane loses control and the pilot says, "If three people jump off, the rest can survive.
The Asian guy goes "This is for my people" and jumps off.
The Hispanic guy goes "This is for my people" and jumps off.
The black guy goes "This is for my people", and kicks the white guy off the plane.

A guy just told me "All asians are ninjas"

I wanted to tell him how racist that was, but he was black and i didn't want to get beat down

What happens to an Asian guy when they run into a wall with a full erection?

They break their nose!

What did the guy in China say to the Chinese couple who finally got approved to adopt?


What does a crab have in common with a Chinese guy who gets run over by a bus?

They're both crushed Asians.

I met a Chinese guy at a party and told him, Do I know you? Are you Chris Chen?

He said, No. I'm Eric. Do all Asian guys look the same to you?

Me: No, I meant do you accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior?

My eyes are fine but I still failed my eye exams...

I guess I shouldn't have copied off the asian guy.

Did you know you can break your nose if you squint hard enough?

I did it on the bus today and some Asian guy punched me in the face!

Did you hear about the Asian guy who was so terrible that nobody mourned his death?

He was unbereaveable.

A racist, a misandrist and a misanthropist kills Thanos

The racist, Tyrone, says: "I need it - so I can remove all the asian people. I really don't like them".

The misandrist, Evelyn, says: "No I need it more - so I can remove all men from existence!"

"Don't be silly! If you remove all the men, women will die out too!" Tyrone shouts out angrily.

While Tyrone and Evelyn argue. Jacob, the misanthropist takes the gauntlet and says: "Don't worry guys today is your lucky day, I got you both covered and then some!"

What do you call an Asian guy who is a member of ISIS?


A priest, a nun, a rabbi, a blonde, a brunette, a redhead, a farmer, his daughter, a horse, a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy all walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "What is this? A joke?"

What do you call a gay Asian guy?

A Caucasian

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the asian guy jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working asian guy piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes