The Best 54 Artists Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Artists jokes. There are some artists artistic jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these artists musicians puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Artists Jokes and Puns

How many dub-step artists does it take to clean a bathtub?

100\. One to actually clean it, and 99 to talk about how dirty it is.

How many performance artists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I don't know either, I walked out early too.

Two martial artists...

...are arguing over who would win a fight between a skilled swordsman carrying a broadsword and a master wielder of an ÊpÊe. They agree that the only way to settle the argument is actually to fight one another, each using one of the two weapons. An epic battle ensues and then, the two swordsmen feinted.

Artists joke, Two martial artists...

How many surreal artists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Three, one to hold the giraffe, and one to put the clocks in the bath tub.

Why are there no Motown artists from North Korea?

Because they have no Seoul.


My late wife was abducted by a troupe of travelling Mime artists.

The police informed me, they did... Unspeakable things to her.

Why are artists the only guys who can sleep with comedians?

Because drawing is the only way to make a comic strip.

Artists joke, Why are artists the only guys who can sleep with comedians?

What kind of weapon is used by martial artists who specialize in wordplay?

Punchucks.[](/teehee)

My ex was gang raped by a troupe of mime artists.

They performed unspeakable acts on her.

Do competitive origami artists ever fold under pressure?

Why do artists smell so bad?

They're too busy drawing their bath to ever actually get in it.

You can explore artists canon reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean artists bands dad jokes. There are also artists puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Why do so many artists in Boston identify as autistic?

"Good artists copy. Great artists steal."

\- Me

what do martial artists eat?

kung food

I hate all 1970's female solo artists

What a bunch of pre-madonnas

what type of shoes do artists wear?

sketchers

Artists joke, what type of shoes do artists wear?

Where do country music artists become country music greats?

The obituaries

Muslim artists threw some paint bombs at a local building...

They blue it up.

Ive just been molested by a group of mime artists...

They did unspeakable things to me.


Why do artists die early in life?

Too many strokes.

Why are Subway cooks called "Sandwich Artists"?

Even art majors deserve recognition

Good artists copy, great artists steal

I wrote that.

What do all the great rap artists put in their coffee?

2Pac Shakur

Where do artists go to truly become great?

The obituaries

Two criminals are trying to get away from an art museum in their getaway van after stealing pieces from 3 artists.

One gets in and turns the key. The van won't start.
The other one turns and asks, "Why aren't we moving?"
"I have no Monet to buy the Gascan to make the Van Gogh."

Why do origami artists make terrible poker players?

They always fold.

Did you hear about the new Netflix series? The one about a couple of poor female artists living in 1600s Rome?

I think it's called Two Baroque Girls

A friend of mine was sexually assaulted by a gang of mime artists last night...

They did unspeakable things to him.

Artists cover their mistakes with paint, chefs cover their mistakes with sauce. How do doctors cover their mistakes?

With dirt.

They say that good artists borrow and great artists steal

This sub must have some pretty great artists...

What do hookers and tattoo artists have in common?

The minimum is $60, unless you're willing to risk catching a disease.

Today, I found out there are places that sell fake scallops made out of white fish...

there are a lot of cod artists out there.

What do you call 5 artists stuck on an island?

Marooned 5

Many people who go to Spain to get tattoos are surprised at how skilled the tattoo artists are.

Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

What do artists say to each other before they duel?

avant garde!

Tattoos

People are amazed at how good the tattoo artists are in Spain........
They weren't expecting the Spanish ink precision

I don't know what it is about artists

but I feel like I'm drawn to them.

People are always amazed at the skilled tattoo artists in Spain.

No one expects the Spanish ink precision

I ran into a 19 year old hipster who's favorite musician was Jimi Hendrix...

It was so strange to see a hipster who liked older music, so I had to ask, What about his music did you like so much?

I just love underground artists he replied.

What kind of shoes do artists wear?

Sketchers...

Why does Subway call its employees Sandwich Artists?

So you can finally say you are earning money as an artist.

I don't trust artists

their jobs are sketchy

A joke from work

Four famous actors get together and decide to dress up as famous artists for Halloween.

Leonardo DiCaprio says he'll go as Da Vinci since they have the same first name.

Tom Cruise says he'll go as Van Gogh so they have two painters.

Bill Murray says he'll go as Beethoven since he likes his music.

Arnold Schwarzenegger just looks at them and says "I'll be Bach."

How many country artists does it take to change a light bulb?

Two.

One changes the light bulb, the other one makes a song how good the old light bulb was.

Q. Why did Germany provide aid to artists hit by coronavirus?

A. They know what happen when painter suffer setbacks.

In New York there are many tattoo artists from all over the world, but for some reason the artists from Spain have trouble getting business.

Why? Because nobody expects the Spanish ink precision!

I live in an artists' commune, but just can't find it in me to trust the visual artists...

They seem kinda sketchy.

My parents were both artists

I call them MoMA and Dada

I was attacked by a group of mime artists.

They did unspeakable things to me.

I met my wife on the net

We were both bad trapeze artists

What do you call two digital artists in a fight?

Graphic Violence

Where do tattoo artists connect?

InkedIn

Why are artists so good at self control?

Because they always know where to draw the line.

What Union do Professional Meme Artists belong to?

The Memesters

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the artists creative jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working artists benefactor piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes