Artie Jokes
4 artie jokes and hilarious artie puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about artie that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Share These Artie Jokes With Friends
Artie Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good artie joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Final Memories
Three friends from the local congregation were asked, "When you're in your casket, and friends and congregation members are mourning over you, what would you like them to say?"
Artie said, "I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a fine spiritual leader, and a great family man."
Eugene commented, "I would like them to say I was a wonderful teacher and servant of God who made a huge difference in people's lives."
Al said, "I'd like them to say, 'Look, he's moving!'"
When your in your casket............?
Three friends from the local congregation were asked,
"When you're in your casket, and friends and congregation members are mourning over you,
what would you like them to say?"
Artie said, "I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a fine
spiritual leader, and a great family man."
Merle commented, "I would like them to say I was a wonderful teacher and servant of God,
who made a huge difference in peoples lives."
Don said, "I'd like them to say, 'Look! He's moving!'"
A guy named Artie gets vegetables stuck in his t**......
Then artichokes.
A Punny way to die
Fred was at his local pub complaining about his neighbour when Artie the landlord takes him to one side. He explains that he used to be in the SAS and for a price he can "make people disappear", it will simply be £5,000 and a deposit.
Fred agrees that he should go ahead but he only has £1 to his name before he gets paid out for his job the next week. As they've known each other for years Artie takes the £1 as a deposit as a gesture of good faith.
The next night Artie follows the victim into a local supermarket where he waits until they are in an isle alone and he strangles the man to death. Turning to leave he spies a shelf stacker who saw everything, he panics and strangles the poor worker too, causing too much commotion to stay hidden he runs out of the store and is captured by the police several blocks away.
The headlines the next morning read:
*Supermarket Shock: Artie Chokes two for a pound!*
...
...
...
I'll show myself out.
Share These Artie Jokes With Friends