Art Museum Jokes
39 art museum jokes and hilarious art museum puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about art museum that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Art Museum Short Jokes
Short art museum jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The art museum humour may include short art gallery jokes also.
- An art museum robber is caught when he tries to get away.... A reporter asks him what went wrong with the robbery. He answers " I didn't have the Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.
- Why did the art thief's van run out of gas as he drove away from the museum? Because he had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.
- Two art theives were going about their business at an art museum. One said to the other, "Grab the Monet and let's Gogh."
- Did you hear about the magician who made an entire art gallery disappear? Now museum, now you don't
- I had a dream I was in a part of the US that was filled with nothing but museums. It was State of the Art.
- The art museum didn't like the box of Tampax I submitted... especially after I told them it was a period piece.
- When the curator of The British Museum was asked how they felt about exotic & foreign art exhibitions, he replied... We could take them or leave them
- What did the art museum do when their LEGO exhibit was inadvertently destroyed? They were distraught, but eventually they picked up the pieces and moved on.
- I recently took a trip to learn more about Greek culture and to gain a greater appreciation of their amazing works of art and architecture. The British museum is a really cool place.
- I went to a museum of modern art the other day and saw a cone statue. I really enjoyed it and would have liked to prolong my visit, but it was truncated.
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Art Museum One Liners
Which art museum one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with art museum? I can suggest the ones about museum and art exhibition.
- Why did the console gamer get a headache at the art museum? Too many frames.
- My friend hates his job at the art museum. He only does it for the Monet.
- What did tom cruise say when he went to the art museum? Show me the Monet!
- which rapper can you find at an art museum? Xzibit
- Why did the robot become a museum curator? Because he was an Art-Offical Intelligence
- What do you call 2 petri dishes enjoying themselves at an art museum? Cultured
- At museums Chuck Norris is allowed to touch the art.
Art Museum Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about art museum you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean history museum jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make art museum pranks.
A Russian, a Frenchman, and an Englishman are in an art museum admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the gardens of Eden.
The Englishman takes a look at the painting and says "They look so calm, they must be British!" The Frenchmen responds "no no! They're n**..., so beautiful, they must be French!" The Russian says "They have no food, no shelter, nothing but an apple to eat, and they are being told this is paradise? They're clearly Russian!"
A Russian, a Frenchman, and an Englishman are in an art museum admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the gardens of Eden.
The Englishman takes a look at the painting and says "They look so calm, they must be British!" The Frenchmen responds "no no! They're n**..., so beautiful, they must be French!" The Russian says "They have no food, no shelter, nothing but an apple to eat, and they are being told this is paradise? ...They're clearly Russian!"
(Whole thing done in thick fake accents)
My fiance had a girls day with her sister at the art museum today, and sent me this.
Fiance: "I would take you to an art museum too. But then i couldn't hold your hand"
Me: "Why couldn't you hold my hand?"
Fiance: "Because i'm not allowed to touch the art"
She got me good.
A man and his wife are in an art museum and come across....
A portrait of a beautiful woman covered only in leaves. Wife goes to move on to the next exhibit and husband is still there staring at the portrait she asks what are you waiting for?
Husband says... Fall
Gas prices are getting out of hand
There was an attempted heist at the art museum. It seems the gang was Baroque and needed Monet. But they didn't buy enough of Degas to make the Van Gogh so they all got arrested.
Two criminals are trying to get away from an art museum in their getaway van after stealing pieces from 3 artists.
One gets in and turns the key. The van won't start.
The other one turns and asks, "Why aren't we moving?"
"I have no Monet to buy the Gascan to make the Van Gogh."
Did you hear the one about the guy accused of robbing the art museum?
I heard he got framed
What can you find in both medieval English castles and American art museums?
Norman Rock Wells.
What did the classical art museum acquisitions director say to the arts benefactor and collector of early Renaissance paintings?
S3ND NUD3S
An art museum in Virginia...
An art museum in Virginia recently opened an exhibition of Robert Mapplethorpe's male n**.... The display of that kind of art in a conservative state has lead to a great deal of local controversy, with local church groups picketing the museum, along with counter-demonstrators by art lovers, civil libertarians, and gay rights groups.
The local paper has begun referring to it as the Battle of Manasses.
How do you know you're in a modern art museum?
If you need to ask if the bench is an art piece.
The MOMA announced that they were opening a new section in the museum for art from Madrid.
Nobody expected the Spanish exhibition.
I just shot this really good picture at an art museum...
Now I'm not allowed back there again.
A man walks into an art museum...
...saunters past a guard and rips a painting off the wall with his bare hands. The guards attempt to stop him as he runs out of the museum, but he is too quick and acrobatic and evades all of their efforts. Just out the museum doors, he hops into the back of a white van that begins speeding away with impressive acceleration; he holds the painting tauntingly out of the back of the van to mock the guards who tried to stop him, standing aghast on the museum steps. A passerby comments to his friend, "wow, look at that van go!"
"No, you idiot," his friend says, "that's a Rembrandt."
The art museum in town is pretty confident in its new exhibit.
They have a 100% Monet-back guarantee