Arrows Jokes

Following is our collection of archery humor and alibi one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Arrows puns for adults, dirty arrow jokes or clean slingshot gags for kids.

There is an abundance of cupid jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 21 funniest jokes on arrows. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any bullet witze you can hear about arrows.

The Best jokes about Arrows

Lord of the Bow

So I was telling my friend about my prowess with a bow and arrow yesterday. I said "my best round ever didn't start so well, I only scored 1 point with each of my first two arrows. Got better after that, scored 2 with the next, then 3, then 5. On my 12th and final arrow I managed to score 144."

She was quick to point out that this was impossible, so I had to confess it was a fibbin' archery sequence.

Arrows & Targets

A boy gets a bow & arrow for his 10th birthday. He walks outside and starts shooting his arrows. Later his father walks in on him and exclaims, "Wow each of these arrows landed in a target great job! Lets go out for ice cream!" So his father and he go out for the ice cream after it's finished his father asks, "how did you do it?" Then the son says, "It wasn't hard. I just shot arrows and drew circles around them."

probably won't get him laid

A guy walks into a bar and starts pretending to shoot arrows to a few girls. One of those girls smiles and gets closer to talk: "Hey, I saw that you threw me an arrow." she said while winking at him.

"Yes, I guess I did." came his reply.

"Who are you?", she asked. "Cupid throwing love arrows?"

"No, I'm Legolas killing orcs"

Bacon tree

Two soldiers are sat on top of a hill looking for targets. One says to the other

"Hey bob, is that a bacon tree?"

"I don't know Jim, go have a look while I stay here and cover our backs"

Jim goes for a closer look and Bob stays on the hill eating his lunch. After a while Jim returns with about ten arrows in his chest.

"My god what happened? Was it a bacon tree?"

"No Bob, turned out to be a ham bush"

There's a guy in a club...

There's a guy in a club imitating that he is throwing arrows at women.

One of the women, smiling, goes and says: Hi

The man responds: Hi

The woman says, still smiling: What are you, Cupid throwing love arrows at women?

The man answers: No, I am Legolas, killing orcs.

What's the difference between Ann Coulter and shooting arrows at lovers?

Shooting arrows at lovers is a Cupid stunt.

I spent Valentine's Day the old fashioned way

Running around in a diaper shooting arrows at people

I got my friend a new set of arrows, but he said they looked like they sucked

I told him not to knock it until he nocks it.

Hamlet has to pee [Hamleak]

Quick little blurb I wrote in class:
To pee, or not to pee, that is the question.
Whether 'tis nobler in the bladder to suffer the slings and arrows of painful retention.
Or to take arm against a see of urine and by opposing relive it.
To go-to pee,
No more; and by a leak we say to end the headache and the thousand visceral shocks that urine is heir to: 'tis a consummation devoutly to be piss'd.

Just discovered there is an award you can give that doesn't require buying any coins!

I've been handing out orange and blue arrows ever since.

A man goes out hunting...

A man goes into the woods to hunt. His wife tells, "I know you're going to get lost, so when you do, shoot three times in the air and wait for someone to find you."

He goes deep into the woods and sure enough, he gets lost. He shoots three times in the air and wait for twenty minutes, but no help arrives. He shoots three times in the air again and waits twenty minutes, but no help arrives. He shoots three times in the air again and says to himself, "Somebody better show up soon, I'm running out of arrows!"

(from my 8 year old) What do you call a Mexican chicken giving directions?

Arrows con Pollo

What's the difference between arrows and boys?

When an arrow hits someone it penetrates right on spot.

Friends are making visual puns

One draws a box with an x on it
"its obviously xbox"
Another draws a station with play on it
"of course its playstation"
Another one draws two people with arrows pointing to eachother with one having nintendo on his shirt.
"its nintendo switch"
Finally one draws a girl with multicolored hair.
"its pc"

3 guys went for an archery competition...

The first guy shoots an arrow into the sky and out of nowhere, a hawk swoops in and catches that arrow and plants it on the bulls eye.

"Who are you?" asked the judge.
"I am Hawkeye.", the first guy replied smugly.

The second guy shoots 2 arrows up into the sky and miraculously, 2 pigeons fly by, catch the arrows with their beaks and plant it on the bulls eye for him.

"Who are you?", asked the bewildered judge.
"I am Oliver Queen." he smirked.

The last guy feeling the pressure of the momentous task to impress shoots 3 arrows into the sky but only to have all of them fell at terminal velocity and penetrate the judge on the arse.

"Wh..wh...who are you?", he groans in great pain.
"I am sorry..."

Three men are on a plane

all three of them have weapons. Halfway through the flight an attendant notices the weapons. She tells the men they cant have the weapons on the plane. The first man drops his arrows from the window. The second man drops his gun from the window. The third man drops his bomb.

After the plane lands, the third man is walking along. He notices a little girl crying.
"Little Girl, why are you crying?" He asks
"My dad just got hit by an arrow." she replies.
Sheepishly he runs away. Then he meets a little crying boy.
"Little boy, why are you crying."
"My dad just got shot by god. It just came from the sky."
The man begins to feel bad. Then he sees a little boy laughing.
"Little boy, why are you laughing."
"I just farted and my house blew up!"

What do young ladies have in common with arrows?

They are all aquiver in the presence of a beau.

Where do you find arrows?

At a Target

I read the Archer's Handbook recently...

"When it comes to arrows, quality is preferable to quantity. A well-made arrow goes a long way".

The other day I bought a Harry Potter themed device that puts the feathers on the backs of my arrows, but it's made out of poo...

It's muh dungus fletcher.

Why Are Young Ladies Like Arrows?

Because they are all aquiver in the presence of a beau.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes