Hilarious Arnold Palmer Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
An amateur golfer playing in his first tournament
was delighted when a beautiful girl came up to him after the round and suggested he come over for a while. The fellow was a bit embarrassed to explain that he really couldn't stay all night but that he'd be glad to come over for a while. Twenty minutes later they were in he bed making love. When it was over, he got out of bed and started getting dressed.
"Hey," called the girl from beneath the covers, "where do you think you're going? Arnold Palmer wouldn't leave so early."
At that he the golfer stripped off his clothes and jumped on top of her. After they'd made love a second time, he got out of bed and put his pants back on.
"What are you up to?" she called. "Jack Nicklaus wouldn't think of leaving now." So the golfer pulled off his pants and s**... her a third time, and afterward he started to get dressed.
"C'mon, you can't leave yet," protested the girl. "Tiger Woods wouldn't call it a day."
"Lady, would you tell me one thing?" asked the golfer, looking at her very seriously. "What's par for this hole?"
One positive of Arnold Palmer's passing...
He's six under for the first time in years...
What do you call it when Arnold Schwarzenegger gives you a handie?
An Ahnold Palmer
If the musicians, Ice T and Lemonade formed a band, what would it be called?
Arnold Palmer
Jesus and Paul are playing golf
Jesus hits his ball out into the middle of a water hazzard. He walks on the water and hits the ball to within a couple of feet of the cup.
The greens keeper walks up to Paul and says "who does he think he is? Jesus Christ?"
Paul replies "no, he think's he's Arnold Palmer"
Arnold Palmer has died...
I heard that he will be half buried and half cremated.
In memory of Arnold Palmer, I wore my golf underwear today...
...the one's with 18 holes.
(Too soon?)
Arnold Palmer's last golf trick.
His body was buried as a whole in one grave.
I am sad I can no longer get Arnold Palmer's at restaurants anymore
But it looks like I can get an Arnold Embalmer now.
I accidentally ordered a "Robert Palmer" instead of an "Arnold Palmer" and now there is a sullen waitress dancing behind me.
Whoa, you like to think that you're immune to the stuff, oh yeah
It's closer to the truth to say you can't get enough
You know you're gonna have to face it, you're addicted to love
I accidently ordered a "Robert Palmer" instead of an "Arnold Palmer" and now there is a sullen waitress dancing behind me.
You had to be there
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