The Best 19 Armpits Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Armpits jokes. There are some armpits genitals jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these armpits stinky puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Armpits Jokes and Puns
My ex was perfect in all aspects except that her armpits smelled
Hands down the best girl I have known.
A woman with hairy armpits enters a bar..
She sits at the end of the bar and raises her arm to call the bartender and a drunkard would say, "Hey, bartender.. give the ballerina a beer on me.."
This happened two more times and the bartender finally asks, "Tell me, I'm curious.. What makes you say that the woman at the end of the bar is a ballerina? "
The drunkard shrugs and says, "Any woman that could lift her leg that high must be a ballerina."
How can you identify a French Infantryman?
Sunburned armpits.
Lily went to a nearby pharmacy to buy her partner some deodorant.
A salesclerk comes up to her and asks what she's looking for.
"I'm looking for some deodorant for my boyfriend, but I don't know what kind he uses."
"Is it the ball type?"
"No," she replied. "It's for his armpits."
A German Tourist is on holiday and needed to buy some deoderant.
So he walks into a chemist and says "I vould like to buy ze deoderant."
Chemist says: "Ball or aerosol?"
Tourist: "No, I vant it for my armpits!"
Dog Show Hair Remover
A young woman had entered her dog in the dog show in the smooth-haired breed category. To give it an advantage, she went to the pharmacist for some hair remover. The pharmacist gave her the product requested and advised, "Just remember to keep your arms up for at least five minutes." "Errr... it's not for my armpits," she flustered, embarrassed, "it's for my Chihuahua" "Oh well, in that case," said the pharmacist, "don't ride a bike for twenty minutes."
Ever heard of an Irish bath?
An Irish bath is when you stand at the sink and just wash your armpits. Some people call it a Gypsy bath, or an Italian shower. A French bath is when you just douse yourself in cologne.
Whatever you call it, it's all just ethnic cleansing.
What's the worst thing about sex as a fat guy?
The fact that my armpits are wetter than the girl.
Yo momma armpits are so hairy
It looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.
Why do gnomes laugh when they play football?
Because the grass tickles their armpits.
I asked a chemist
"Where's the deoderant?
"Ball or aerosol," he asked.
"No," I said, "it's for my armpits."
You can explore armpits ballerina reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean armpits fifi dad jokes. There are also armpits puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
How can armpits stop smelling?
If their noses are plugged
The French Bride
How do you tell a French bride at her wedding?
She's the one with the braided armpits.
A man walks into a Swedish chemist shop.....
... and asks for some deodorant. The shopkeeper says 'ball or aerosol?' The man answers 'neither, I want it for my armpits.
Why did the armpits lose the war against the elbows?
They were under-armed.
Swedish Chemist's Shop
(Imagine the Swedish accents)
A man goes into a Swedish chemists shop.
The assistant says, Good morning sir, how may I help you today?"
The customer says, "I'd like to buy a deodorant please."
"Certainly sir. Ball or aerosol?"
The customer replies, "No, I'd like it for my armpits."
I never had a girlfriend because of how I smell..
I sniff their armpits while looking them straight in their eyes.
What is your funniest joke about the French?
Mine is this: How do you pick out the Frenchmen in a room full of naked soldiers? They're the ones with sunburned armpits.
A Swedish man goes into a store
I would like a deodorant, please
The store manager replies ball or aerosol?
And the Swedish man replies What? It's for my armpits.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the armpits deutsch jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working armpits hairiest piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.