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Armed Robbery Jokes

21 armed robbery jokes and hilarious armed robbery puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about armed robbery that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Armed Robbery Short Jokes

Short armed robbery jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The armed robbery humour may include short armed robber jokes also.

  1. Someone told me that if you hold a Shell up you can hear the sea All I got was 6 years for armed robbery.
  2. I didn't hear the sea when I held a Shell up I did, however, get six years in jail for armed robbery of a petrol station.
  3. My armless uncle was a bank robber for 40 years and th e police couldn't ever capture him... Apparently, they couldn't arrest him for armed robbery.
  4. In the middle of a bank robbery, a guy with no arms walks right in and says Dont shoot. Im unarmed.
  5. Last week I got a picture framed Now it's doing 10 years for armed robbery but swears that it's innocent
  6. Police have arrested a gang of Corn Flakes that they alledge committed a spree of armed robberies throughout the metro area. A Police spokesman described them as... ....cereal offenders.
  7. During an armed robbery at a bank, one teller hissed and whispered to the next teller. "Here are the 100 bucks I owe you."
  8. What was Pinocchio's defense when he was tried for armed robbery? well, Geppetto was the one pulling the strings
  9. I'm going away for life because of armed robbery. I can finally afford my dream ski house in Switzerland

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Armed Robbery One Liners

Which armed robbery one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with armed robbery? I can suggest the ones about robbing bank and bank robber.

  1. A group of amputees have escaped after a violent bank robbery, one armed and dangerous.
  2. Yesterday I had a picture framed Now is doing time upstate for armed robbery.
  3. What do you call a person that commits a robbery with his bare hands? An armed robber..
  4. My picture got framed the other day... Now it's upstate doing time for armed robbery.
  5. What do you call an armed robbery of a salvation army truck? Grand Thrift Auto

Fun-Filled Armed Robbery Jokes to Boost Your Mood

What funny jokes about armed robbery you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean robbing jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make armed robbery pranks.

An armed masked man bursts into a bank yelling "EVERYBODY PUT YOUR HANDS UP, THIS IS A ROBBERY!"

The patrons and staff, terrified, comply.
He's loading up his sack with cash when his mask slips off. He quickly pulls it back up and sees two guys who may have seen his face. He points his gun at the first.
"Did you see my face?"
"Yes"
BANG, he shoots him.
He then points it at the second guy.
"Did you see my face?"
The second guy points at a woman sitting far off in the reception area.
"No, but my mother in law did!"

Not guilty

p**... went to trial for armed robbery.
After a long drawn out trial, the jury foreman came out and announced, "Not guilty."
"That's grand!" shouted p**.... "Does that mean I can keep the money?"

A man is on trial for armed robbery...

The jury comes back with the verdict. The foreman stands, clear his t**... and announces, Not guilty. The defendant leaps to his feet. Awesome! he shouts. Does that mean I get to keep the money?