Archaeologist Jokes

Following is our collection of archeology humor and tutankhamun one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Archaeologist puns for adults, dirty researcher jokes or clean archaeology gags for kids.

There is an abundance of herpetologist jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 58 funniest jokes on archaeologist. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any geologist witze you can hear about archaeologist.

The Best jokes about Archaeologist

Why is the archaeologist sad?

Because his career is in ruins.

Childish but made me laugh

How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Show him a used tampon and ask, "What period is this from?"

How do you troll an archaeologist?

Give him a used tampon and ask which period it's from.

My career is in ruins.

It's great being an archaeologist.

Why did the archaeologist ask a diamond out to dinner?

Because of his enthusiasm for Carbon-Dating.

Why wasn't the archaeologist interested in girls?

Because he only dated mummies.

I'm an archaeologist...

My life is in ruins.

Why do archaeologists collect used tampons?

They like to figure out what period they came from..

How to embarrass an archaeologist:

hand them a used tampon and ask, "which period is this from?"

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have.

The older she gets, the more interested he is in her.

Archaeologists have recently found a mummy while excavating a tomb in Egypt

Oddly enough, the mummy was covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. They believe it to be the tomb of Pharaoh Rosher.

Archaeologists are the ultimate hipsters

They love all that underground stuff.

My Exgirlfriend Was An Archaeologist.

She loved digging up the past.

Archaeologists say that Roman cement was stronger than it is in modern times...

I need to see some concrete evidence

Three Homemade Jokes (Puns) ENJOY

Two worms are going through a pantry. They go through some apples, pears, and other things. After a while, they get STUCK, in something hard and green. One says to the other, "Man, we really got ourselves into a pickle."

An archaeologist is going through an underground cave and comes across a woman, frozen, and preserved in time. He instantly fell in love with her. However, after a while of trying the relationship, he realized it wouldn't work out. He just couldn't break the ice.

Did you hear about the boy who ate his exam? Three hours later and he still hadn't passed his test.

How did the two archaeologists fall in love

Carbon dating.

Archaeologists discover the remains of a slave-worker under famous statue in Giza

Reports claim he died of Asphinxiation

I was dating an archaeologist but I had to break up with her

Turns out she was a gold digger.

Why was the archaeologist sad?

Because his career was in ruins!!

Give me your downvotes; I AM FUELED BY YOUR DOWNVOTES!!!!

Archaeologists have found a tampon in the desert

They're trying to work out what period it came from.

Museum Security

There was a man who was an aspiring archaeologist and he was curious about dinosaurs and fossils. He went to a museum and saw a giant fossil skeleton of a T-Rex, but he didn't know the age, however. He asked the security guard nearby Hey do you know how old that dinosaur fossil is? The security guard replied 65 million and 3 years old! The man was intrigued by the age of the fossil but confused . How do you know it's exactly 65 million and 3 years old?, that seems very specific for carbon dating to me! The security guard replied Well, it was 65 million years old when I first started working here, 3 years ago.

Archaeologists found Beethoven furiously erasing his music

When asked what he was doing Beethoven responded "I'm decomposing"

Archaeologists have been searching around ..

Archaeologists have been searching around The Great Pyramids, and have come across a mummy covered in hazelnuts and chocolate. After more research it has been discovered it was the late Pharaoh Roche

Never become an archaeologist...

your life will be in ruins.

What song does an archaeologist listen to when their work site is closed?

No Diggity

Archaeologists digging in Egypt have found a Mummy embalmed with chocolate and hazlenuts

It's believed to be a Pharaoh Rocher

How to irritate an archaeologist?

Show him a used women's pad and ask him which period it belongs to.

An archaeologist notices his partner appears to be nibbling a fossil...

Curious, he walks over and asks, "What you got there?"
"Not sure", replies the fellow, "But you have got to try-a-lil'-bite!"

My archaeologist friend has invited me to a party to celebrate finding an ancient man's leg.

It should be quite a shin-dig.

How do you stump an archaeologist?

Hand them a used tampon and ask what period it comes from.

An archaeologist, paleontologist and hair stylist walk into a bar...

A man walks up to them and asks if they could help him identify the authenticity of a pile of fossilized T-Rex dung.


The archaeologist, after thoroughly examining the dung, says,

"I've been looking for a specimen like this for years, this is definitely the real thing!"


The paleontologist, after a brief inspection, says,
"I've seen a few of these before and this one looks like a genuine one."


The hair stylist, after one look, immediately declares that it's a fake.


The man asks "how do you know?"


The hair stylist replies,

"I've been working with shampoo for 30 years."

Why did the archaeologist go bankrupt?

Because his career was in ruins

I was an archaeologist once...

But my career ended in ruins

What's the difference between an archaeologist and a grave robber?

The robber does the crime, then does the time. The archaeologist does the time, then the crime.

Archaeologists have discovered a mummy in Egypt encased in chocolate and surrounded by hazelnuts

They are calling it "The Pharaoh Rocher"

What do you call a jewish archaeologist?

Torah the explorer.

How do you know you have a crush on an archaeologist?

You just dig them

Archaeologists have found a hidden chamber in Tutankhamun's tomb

Archaeologists have found a second mummy inside Tutankhamun's tomb. The mummy appears to be covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. Experts believe it is the remains of Pharaoh Rocher.

What did the lady archaeologist say

I have a "bone" to pick with you

What's a woman ideal husband?

An archaeologist. The older she gets the more interested he becomes.

How do you confuse an Archaeologist?

Give them a tampon and ask them what period its from.

Archaeologists discovered an ancient city in Iraq.

According to the archaeologists, ancient Iraqis looked like skeletons, lived underground, and walked lying down.

why are archaeologists so proud of their study?

their work is always groundbreaking

Archaeologists have uncovered the remains of an ancient civilisation of chalk people.

They are now determining when they were wiped out.

Why does an archaeologist make the best husband?

Because the older she gets, the more interested he will be in her

Archaeologists are incestuous people,

they date their mummy's

Archaeologists recently unearthed a computer dating back to prehistoric times

It had a jurassic pterobyte of storage space

An archaeologist is a dream job...

Because then it's okay when your life is in ruins.

My wife's an Archaeologist because...

She keeps on digging up the past!

Why is the archaeologist depressed?

Some old stuff just got dug up

What did the hipster from Pompeii say to the archaeologist who discovered him?

"I was into volcanic ash before it was cool."

Who is an archaeologist?

One whose career is in ruins.

How do you make an archaeologist blush?

Show him a used tampon and ask him what period it came from.

Archaeologists have finally deciphered hieroglyphics thought to be almost 6000 years old. The first sentence says..

The real joke is in the comments.

It's tough being married to an archaeologist

They're always bringing up stuff from like centuries ago

How do you confuse an Archaeologist?

Give him a used sanitary towel to inspect and ask him which period it came from...

An old archaeologist is studying late in his museum

He rubs an old lamp and *pooof!* a genie appears.
- Old man, all your life was dedicated to study my culture. To thank you, you can choose one between three wishes : The eternal youth, the neverending wealth or the greatest wisdom of mankind.
- It seems legit. The youth, i know it. I don't need money. I so choose the wisdom.
- So be it. Let the wisdom of all our intellectuals submerges your soul.

The archaeologist feels his brain going faster ... and faster. After a few seconds he looks at his shoes and whispers :
- I'm such an idiot!

If you become an Archaeologist

Your career will be in ruins

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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