Arch Jokes

Following is our collection of bosch humor and alla one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Arch puns for adults, dirty enemies jokes or clean linguists gags for kids.

There is an abundance of atch jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 85 funniest jokes on arch. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any imminent witze you can hear about arch.

The Best jokes about Arch

Why is the archaeologist sad?

Because his career is in ruins.

Ever since I became an archeologist

My career has been in ruins

Why don't archeologists get married?

They are only interested in dating.

I have an archaeology exam tomorrow

And it doesn't matter if I pass or fail because either way...

My future's in ruins.

Why did the archaeologist ask a diamond out to dinner?

Because of his enthusiasm for Carbon-Dating.


Why wasn't the archaeologist interested in girls?

Because he only dated mummies.

How do you know archeologists are lonely?

Theyre always coming up with new dating techniques.

Archeologists in Egypt have discovered a mummy covered in chocolate and hazelnuts.

They believe it to be Pharaoh Rocher.

I'm an archaeologist...

My life is in ruins.

Two archers are sipping pints in a pub.

The first archer says, "Did you see the new leathersmith? He's a beast of a man with eyes as black as night."

To which the second archer replies, "Aye, he makes me quiver".

Archeologists in South Africa have just discoved what they think is the oldest tampon ever found

They are trying to find out what period it came from


An architect, a lawyer, and a hunter were sitting at a bar.

The three men were having a debate about whose job was the oldest.

"Obviously it's my job," bragged the hunter. "Cavemen got their food by hunting, which makes my job older than civilization."

"Yes," the architect replied, "but if you read the Bible, it says God created the universe out of darkness and chaos. This technically makes God the architect of the universe."

The lawyer simply smirked. "True, but who do you think invented darkness and chaos?"

Why do archaeologists collect used tampons?

They like to figure out what period they came from..

Why was the archeologist depressed?

because his career was in ruins

Why are archers good at building planes?

Because they're experts in arrow dynamics

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have.

The older she gets, the more interested he is in her.

Archaeologists have recently found a mummy while excavating a tomb in Egypt

Oddly enough, the mummy was covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. They believe it to be the tomb of Pharaoh Rosher.

What do you call competitors of McDonald's?

Arch enemies.

Archaeologists are the ultimate hipsters

They love all that underground stuff.


An archery contest

Once upon a time there was an archery competition.

The first contestant, wearing a long cape covering his face, put a watermelon on a volunteer, took 100 paces away then turned and fired. The watermelon exploded. The archer took off his cape and claimed: I AM ROBINHOOD!

The second one with a hood put an apple above the volunteer head, took 200 paces and fired right through the apple. He then removed the hood and shouted: I AM BAYEK OF SIWA!

Finally, a third man with a mask lined up in position. He put a grape on the volunteer's head and went away for 500 paces. He shot, then grinned and said: ^^^^^I ^^^^^am ^^^^^sorry .

Archaeologists say that Roman cement was stronger than it is in modern times...

I need to see some concrete evidence

A bridge killed my family...

We're arch enemies now.

How did the two archaeologists fall in love

Carbon dating.

When my wife was putting on her makeup, I told her that she had put too much arch in her eyebrows.

She looked surprised.

An archeologist finds three coffins. The first two have ornate drawing of a person covering each of their front sides. The third one, however, possessed only a primitive sort of stick figure. Who did the archeologist think was buried in the last coffin?

The coffin painter

Archaeologists discover the remains of a slave-worker under famous statue in Giza

Reports claim he died of Asphinxiation

Why was the archaeologist sad?

Because his career was in ruins!!



Give me your downvotes; I AM FUELED BY YOUR DOWNVOTES!!!!

Where does the architecture school's principal send bad students?

To the suspension bridge.

Archaeologists have found a tampon in the desert

They're trying to work out what period it came from.

Archaeologists found Beethoven furiously erasing his music

When asked what he was doing Beethoven responded "I'm decomposing"

Archaeologists have been searching around ..

Archaeologists have been searching around The Great Pyramids, and have come across a mummy covered in hazelnuts and chocolate. After more research it has been discovered it was the late Pharaoh Roche

Never become an archaeologist...

your life will be in ruins.

How often did the architect have to put long narrow paths in his blueprints?

Hallways

Archaeologists digging in Egypt have found a Mummy embalmed with chocolate and hazlenuts

It's believed to be a Pharaoh Rocher

Why do archeologists make bad girlfriends?

They always dig up the past...

An archaeologist notices his partner appears to be nibbling a fossil...

Curious, he walks over and asks, "What you got there?"
"Not sure", replies the fellow, "But you have got to try-a-lil'-bite!"

Archimedes wasn't just known for inventing his many inventions. He's also considered to have invented the first insult when talking to his brother who was a cheese maker after discovering a early form of lindburger cheese....

He simply stated, You reeka!

My archaeologist friend has invited me to a party to celebrate finding an ancient man's leg.

It should be quite a shin-dig.

Why did the archaeologist go bankrupt?

Because his career was in ruins

My ex should go into archaeology.

He's excellent at digging up and analyzing the past to put on display.

An archaeologist, paleontologist and hair stylist walk into a bar...

A man walks up to them and asks if they could help him identify the authenticity of a pile of fossilized T-Rex dung.

 

The archaeologist, after thoroughly examining the dung, says,

"I've been looking for a specimen like this for years, this is definitely the real thing!"

 

The paleontologist, after a brief inspection, says,
"I've seen a few of these before and this one looks like a genuine one."

 

The hair stylist, after one look, immediately declares that it's a fake.

 

The man asks "how do you know?"

 

The hair stylist replies,

"I've been working with shampoo for 30 years."

Archie: "Right guys, so it says 0,1,1,2,3,5,8,13,21 so the next two numbers have to be 34 and 55

Me: "You've gotta be fibbing Archie"

Do you know what the arch enemies of skinheads are?

Blackheads.

Why did the bee fly in a parabolic arch?

Just bee-cos.

I was an archaeologist once...

But my career ended in ruins

Why did no one like the Archer

Because he was too arrowgant!

Archaeologists have discovered a mummy in Egypt encased in chocolate and surrounded by hazelnuts

They are calling it "The Pharaoh Rocher"

Archimedes law of bathing

When your body immersed in water, the phone rings

What did the architect do at the nightclub?

He raised the roof.

I became an architect just west of Japan.

It was a bad Korea choice.

Archaeologists have found a hidden chamber in Tutankhamun's tomb

Archaeologists have found a second mummy inside Tutankhamun's tomb. The mummy appears to be covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. Experts believe it is the remains of Pharaoh Rocher.

I went to an archaeology party where the game was looking for a lower leg bone.

It was a real shindig.

Archaeologists discovered an ancient city in Iraq.

According to the archaeologists, ancient Iraqis looked like skeletons, lived underground, and walked lying down.

An architect knows

How to make a long story short.

Two Scientists walk into a bar

Bartender comes around

The bartender: What will you be having?

Scientist 1: I'll have some H20

The bartender hands him a glass of water

The bartender: And you?

Scientist 2: I'll have some H20 also

Scientist 2's arch nemesis disguised as the bartender: -Snaps finger- So close

Do you know why most archeologists are females?









Because they love digging up the past

What's Archduke Ferdinads favorite type of samwich?

The POW boy.

Why did the architect take so long to get started on his church blueprints?

He couldn't decide what font to use.

why are archaeologists so proud of their study?

their work is always groundbreaking

Archaeologists have uncovered the remains of an ancient civilisation of chalk people.

They are now determining when they were wiped out.

Why does an archaeologist make the best husband?

Because the older she gets, the more interested he will be in her

Archaeologists recently unearthed a computer dating back to prehistoric times

It had a jurassic pterobyte of storage space

Archaeologists are incestuous people,

they date their mummy's

An archaeologist is a dream job...

Because then it's okay when your life is in ruins.

Archimedes Principle floats my boat.

Archeologists discovered an ancient Egyptian tomb that was dedicated solely to women.

At least that's what they concluded as it was full of Mummys.

Why is the archaeologist depressed?

Some old stuff just got dug up

Archeologists recently uncovered an ancient garden that was centuries old.

The romains were in great condition.

How do architects, engineers and male pornstars gain fame?

Through their erections.

An archeologist found a tampon.

An archeologist found a tampon.
He wondered what period it was from.

(Not my joke! Credit to Shane Koyczan's poet friend)

You know what I like about archeologists?

You can never ruin their day

My wife's an Archaeologist because...

She keeps on digging up the past!

"You won't be able to stop me this time, Captain Food Saver,"

shouted The Moldy Bread at his arch nemesis, who was very tightly bound.

"Ah ha! But there's where you're wrong, Moldy! I brought along an old weapon that you've forgotten about..."

The Moldy Bread ignored the Captain, stating, "It's too late! I've already started up my Mold Machine! My lifelong purpose will finally be fulfilled when all of the world's bread is moldy! Muahahahaha!"

The great sci-fi-looking cannon started whirring and humming. At the last possible moment before the machine fired, Captain Food Saver burst through his bonds and threw a small and very thin sheet of metal in front of the cannon. The blast reflected off the surface of the metal, and back into the cannon, making it collapse in on itself into a rotten and damp pile.

Devastated, The Moldy Bread shouted, "Curse you Captain Food Saver! My plan was foiled again!"

Why did Louis XIV seize possession of an Italian triumph?

To absolutely claim it as, "Mon arch"

The Burger King King hates Ronald McDonald

Not only because the represent competing restaurants, but because they both like the same girl.

Ronald is his double arch nemesis.

Who is an archaeologist?

One whose career is in ruins.

Hello, I'm Hydroxide Dad. I stand for Truth and positivity.

My arch nemesis is Sodium Man. He can make me Lye.

Why did the two podiatrists hate each other?

They were arch enemies.

Two chemists at a restaurant

[restaurant]

Chemist 1: I'll have some H2O

Chemist 2: I'll have some H2O also

Chemist 2's arch nemesis disguised as a waiter: [under breath] so close....

If you become an Archaeologist

Your career will be in ruins

Archaeologists have finally deciphered hieroglyphics thought to be almost 6000 years old. The first sentence says..

The real joke is in the comments.

Archdeacons are Deacons but archer.

Because they bow.

An old archaeologist is studying late in his museum

He rubs an old lamp and *pooof!* a genie appears.
- Old man, all your life was dedicated to study my culture. To thank you, you can choose one between three wishes : The eternal youth, the neverending wealth or the greatest wisdom of mankind.
- It seems legit. The youth, i know it. I don't need money. I so choose the wisdom.
- So be it. Let the wisdom of all our intellectuals submerges your soul.

The archaeologist feels his brain going faster ... and faster. After a few seconds he looks at his shoes and whispers :
- I'm such an idiot!

How do Architects handle a problem?

They Soffit!

What did the diabetic superhero say after he lost a fight with his arch nemesis?

I've been defeeted.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes