Arabic Jokes

Following is our collection of muhammed humor and hamza one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Arabic puns for adults, dirty moroccan jokes or clean saudi gags for kids.

There is an abundance of hammad jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 36 funniest jokes on arabic. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any arab witze you can hear about arabic.

The Best jokes about Arabic

I told a good drone joke in arabic

It went over american's heads, but it killed in the middle east

Old Arabic joke going to translate the best I can

Their was a goat farmer named Kassim and his wife and one day the wife went to feed the goats. Unfortunately for her the male goat was particularly aggressive that day and mauled her to death. During her funeral the farmers brother Khalid came from another town. His brother Khalid was amazed how many people showed up to the funeral said "Kassim look how many people came to pay their respects to your wife you and her must be beloved in the area." In tears Kassim says " they are not here for the funeral they are here hoping to buy the goat".

Originally an Arabic joke!

A small town had one pharmacy until another opened across from the old one. A guy walks in the new pharmacy and asks the pharmacists for some Aspirin the pharmacist hands him one giant tablet, the man asks, How is this supposed to help? It's not gonna kill me? The pharmacist says Oh no, you see, we follow a modern approach to healing, you just have to take this entire tablet one time and you will be ok. The man pays the Pharmacist goes home and force the giant tablet down his throat and notices that it's acting fast! The same man comes back another time with a terrible cough and asks for a cough medicine. The pharmacist hands him a gallon size cough syrup bottle and says Drink the whole thing at once and you will be fine! the man thanks the pharmacist and follows his exact instruction, the cough goes away. On another day the pharmacist is standing outside his pharmacy when he sees the same man sneaking in and out the other pharmacy. The guy comes back weeks later asking for band aids the pharmacist refuses to sell him any of his giant ones and says You know I saw you going into the other pharmacy. I thought you are becoming a loyal client of mine! The man responses and says, Don't get me wrong sir, I am a loyal customer. I just needed some adult suppositories.

I noticed lately you guys like translated jokes, here's an arabic one

A muslim extremist went in a taxi and on his way to his destination he noticed the radio was on so he asked the taxi driver..

M: Did they have radio in Prophet Mohammad's time?

T: No.

M: So why do you have the radio on?

T: *turns off the radio*

Then the extremist asks another question..

M: What about air conditioning? I'm sure you know the answer.

T: No they did not.

M: So why do you have it on?

T: *turns it off*

The taxi driver decided to ask the extremist a question this time..

T: Did they have taxi's in Prophet Mohammad's time?

M: Of course not!

T: Then GFTO!

A Coca Cola salesman returns from his Middle East assignment...

A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment.

A friend asked, Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?

The salesman explained, "When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I will make a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn't know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters... First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand... totally exhausted and fainting. Second, the man is drinking our Cola and Third, our man is now totally refreshed. Then these posters were pasted all over the place"

"That should have worked," said the friend.

The salesman replied, "Well, not only did I not speak Arabic, I also didn't realize that Arabs read from right to left..."


A coke seller

The disappointed salesman of coke returns from middle east assignment. A friend asked," why weren't you successful with the Arabs?"

The salesman explained," when I got posted in the middle east, I was very confident that I will make a good sales pitch as cola is unknown there. But I had a problem I didn't know Arabic.

So I planned to convey this message through 3 posters. The first poster is a man crawling through the hot desert. Second the man drinker cola and third man is totally refreshed. Then these posters were hanged everywhere there."

"That should have worked."said the friend.

He replied," well I didn't know Arabic neither realized that Arabs read from right to left...."

What do you call an Arabic dairy farmer?

A milk sheikh.

Tomorrow you should turn back our clocks one hour. for Daylight Saving Time

Unless you're Arabic, in which case you should set it forward 14 centuries.

I've started learning Arabic

So I know when to start running.

How do you say goodbye in Arabic?

"BOOM!"

Arabic joke translation attempt

A guy walks into a grocery store and asks the shop guy, do you have cucumbers?

Store guy replies: yes I do

The man replies: put it in your ass

The next day, the man does the same thing, walks in, asks about cucumbers and tells the store guy to put it in his ass.

The following day, the store owner thinks, this has to stop.

The man walks into the store, asks if the shop guy has cucumbers.

The guy replies: no I don't have any.

The man tells him: get them out of your ass.


Another joke translated from Arabic

A man was walking home from work when he got in a car accident

His wife comes in a hurry to the hospital and asks the Doctor how he's doing the Doctor says

We got him out of intensive care but he died

My Arabic sex doll

blows itself up

What did the Arabic neckbeard name his son?

M'hammad.

Have You Heard of the Arabic Santa Clause?

No? Me either. It's because he's on the No-Fly list.

Some idiot asked me what the 27th letter of the Arabic alphabet is...

And all I could say was, "Wow".

Why did the unfaithful Arabic woman cross the road?

To get to the other Sayid.

What do you get when you cross slow dancing with Arabic royalty?

Dancing Sheikh to Sheikh.

My Arabic friend was thinking about throwing his Gillete razors away but decided not to

In spite of everything, they're still the best Aman can get


What is the Arabic word for Priest?

Infidel.

Burka Insurance

Did you know that Arabic women can get 100% coverage on burka insurance?

Marine Le Pen, recount the vote!

I do not trust Arabic numbers, use Roman numerals.

I don't understand numbers,

It's all Arabic to me.

I had some really terrible Arabic food today

I tell ya, it was fal-awful!

A man asked a scholar if it is okay to scratch your hand while in pilgrimage...

Hey guys, it is bedtime now and am pretty depressed after a long bad day. Remembering this story-found in Arabic literature-made me chuckle so I hope it will brighten your day too.

A man asked a scholar if it is okay to scratch own arm while in pilgrimage?

The scholar: yes, you can.

Man: to what extent?

The scholar: until you see the bones!!!

What do you call a cowshed in Arabic?

A Mubarak

What do you call an Arabic rapper?

Vanilla Isis

What did the policeman say when the Arabic man escaped from jail?

GOTTA CATCH JAMAL

"Are you really from France?"

"Yes, I am."

"Prove it. Say something in Arabic."

What do you call an Arabic amphibian?

A sallah-mander

The word jihad gets a bad rap, but really it's just the Arabic word for struggle.

Trying not to overeat at Golden Corrall? Now that is jihad.

Allahu Snackbar.

When can yelling "God is great" to people be a bad thing?

When you yell it in Arabic

TIFU by downloading a movie from an arabic website. The language was dubbed.

And before you all go on saying wrong sub, well, yes, that was arabic too.

What do you call an Arabic guy who's down in the dumps?

Saad Maan

Why did the Arab-Jamaican get offended by Pokemon?

Because in Arabic there is no P only an F

Frank

Frank wanted to learn Arabic. So he got himself an Arabic teacher, she taught him a few words. The she asked him what is his name, he answered Ana Frank


Ana = I am. Or me

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes