Approve Jokes

Following is our collection of consent humor and beth one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Approve puns for adults, dirty oppose jokes or clean cara gags for kids.

There is an abundance of disapprove jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 28 funniest jokes on approve. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any unanimously witze you can hear about approve.

The Best jokes about Approve

When my cab driver found out I was gay, he told me this joke. I approve.

Q: What do you call a gay man with a vasectomy?

A: Seedless fruit.

I lost my watch at a party.

After some intensive searching through the crowd, I spotted it lying on the floor. There was a guy standing on it. When I looked up, I saw the guy harassing a girl, touching her at all the wrong places. She obviously didn't approve. So I walked over there and punched this guy in the face. Nobody treats girls like that. Not on my watch.

I dated an English teacher for a few months, but it didn't work out.

She didn't approve of my improper use of the colon.

I used to go out with an English teacher, but she dumped me.

I used to go out with an English teacher, but she dumped me.


She didn't approve of my improper use of the colon.

People don't approve when I run up to them in the street & try to make plaster casts of their faces.

At least that's the impression that I get.


A man comes home to his wife with two black eyes

The wife freaks out but calms down enough to ask what happened. The man says well i was in the mall today on the escalator and there was this cute girl in front of me and she had her skirt tucked into her but. I pulled it out for her and she turned around and punched me in the eye. The wife says yeah i approve of that but how did you get the second one? The man says well i figured she liked it that way and pushed it back in.

The Church Gossip

Mildred, the church gossip, self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several members did not approve of her extra curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused Tom, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup truck parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told Tom and several others that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing.

Tom, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn't explain, defend, or deny. He said nothing.

Later that evening, Tom quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred's house...walked home...and left it there all night.

A priest and a nun are golfing...

The priest misses a putt and yells " dammit I missed!" The nun tells him not to swear because God won't approve of it. On the next hole the priest hits a bad shot and yells once again " dammit I missed" and the nun tells him," don't swear anymore or the sky will open up and God will strike you down" . On the next hole the priest once again messes up and once again yells "dammit I missed!" At that point the sky opened up and the nun gets struck by lighting. The priest looks up with astonishment and from the sky he hears " dammit I missed!"

How many Germans does it take to screw in a Lightbulb?

**One.**

**Germans are very efficient and not very funny.**

*Source: My co-worker.*

*I'm German and I approve this message.*

Why would antivaxxers make terrible bartenders?

They don't approve of shots.

TIL Steve Irwin was trying to market his own sunblock.

The FDA wouldn't approve it because it didn't protect you against all rays.


It is said that the Sheiks in Dubai do not approve of the Flintstones.

But those in Abu Dhabi do.

I try so hard not to upset my vegan girlfriend.

I'm constantly treading on eggshells.

Which she also doesn't approve of.

My girlfriend of two years just left me.

Turns out the police didn't exactly approve of our relationship.

When it comes to Russian Roulette ..

.. 5/6 approve

I don't approve of the homosexual lifestyle...

but $50 is $50.

I don't approve of political jokes

They keep on getting elected.

Gimme a White Russian, Hold The Russian.

At an all-you-can-eat buffet, my nine-year-old was excited to find a chocolate milk machine. But her aunt did not approve. Chocolate milk for dinner? she asked.

It's delicious! said my daughter.

Her aunt shrugged. Well, its 8 a.m. somewhere.

John and Jane go to see a marriage counsellor.

The counsellor says, "So, you two are married, correct?"

"Correct," they reply.

"And you are having regular sex?" asks the counsellor.

"Absolutely," they reply,

"So," laughs the counsellor, "What is the problem?"

They say, "Well, our partners don't really approve."


Why don't Baptists approve of premarital sex?

Because it might lead to dancing.

My grandmother didn't approve of me working at the nudist tennis club.

But you should have seen her face when I told her I'd been promoted from ball boy to head of staff.

I don't approve of the relationship between the Eurasian and Indian Plates...

Both of them are in it just to get Himalaid.

I finally met my pen pal who had recently got out of prison.

My parents didn't approve of him, but that was because they had no context.

Why did Hitler approve of his mathematicians?

They were all ~z-s.

Why the pope does not approve of continuous functions?

Because it is not holy.

Delicious goat.

Mom and Dad invited Aunt Edna over for dinner. Mom was cooking while Dad set the table, and Aunt Edna asked Timmy what they were having for dinner.

"Fish," said Timmy.

"Hmf," said Aunt Edna. "I don't approve of foods that have spent their previous lives immersed in salt. Are you quite sure?"

"Yep." Timmy shrugged. "Dad said to Mom, 'Today is just as good as any to have the old trout for dinner.'"

Two dudes were masturbating in my living room.

I told them to beat it but they didn't leave! They even thanked me for my approval! I don't approve and I'm appalled and offended.

I provoked my therapist but she didn't seem to approve.

I can't help it though, she just makes me feel a tease.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes