Amusing & Witty Approve Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun
When my cab driver found out I was gay, he told me this joke. I approve.
Q: What do you call a gay man with a vasectomy?
A: Seedless fruit.
I lost my watch at a party.
After some intensive searching through the crowd, I spotted it lying on the floor. There was a guy standing on it. When I looked up, I saw the guy harassing a girl, touching her at all the wrong places. She obviously didn't approve. So I walked over there and punched this guy in the face. Nobody treats girls like that. Not on my watch.
I dated an English teacher for a few months, but it didn't work out.
She didn't approve of my improper use of the colon.
I used to go out with an English teacher, but she dumped me.
I used to go out with an English teacher, but she dumped me.
She didn't approve of my improper use of the colon.
Trump says he'll put a cap on immigrants coming into the US—I don't approve.
Immigrants should be allowed to wear what they like.
People don't approve when I run up to them in the street & try to make plaster casts of their faces.
At least that's the impression that I get.
A man comes home to his wife with two black eyes
The wife freaks out but calms down enough to ask what happened. The man says well i was in the mall today on the escalator and there was this cute girl in front of me and she had her skirt tucked into her but. I pulled it out for her and she turned around and punched me in the eye. The wife says yeah i approve of that but how did you get the second one? The man says well i figured she liked it that way and pushed it back in.
How many Germans does it take to screw in a Lightbulb?
**One.**
**Germans are very efficient and not very funny.**
*Source: My co-worker.*
*I'm German and I approve this message.*
Why would antivaxxers make terrible bartenders?
They don't approve of shots.
I have a friend in prison who is very kind.
Someone asked him to donate his eye, he gave it for free. Someone asked for his kidney, he also gave it for free. Another asked for his hands, he gave them both, free of charge.
My good friend was still willing to donate his legs as well but the Warden didn't approve it.
The Warden said, "That's enough! You think I didn't notice that you are trying to escape piece by piece?!"
TIL Steve Irwin was trying to market his own sunblock.
The FDA wouldn't approve it because it didn't protect you against all rays.
You can explore approve consent reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean approve oppose dad jokes. There are also approve puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
It is said that the Sheiks in Dubai do not approve of the Flintstones.
But those in Abu Dhabi do.
I try so hard not to upset my vegan girlfriend.
I'm constantly treading on eggshells.
Which she also doesn't approve of.
Approverypriate.
Sorry - that was very inappropriate.
My wife does not approve of my collection of bobbleheads that look just like me.
She says I have a tendency to get ahead of myself.
So I'm trying to open a chain of outdoor, overnight facilities to help children overcome symptoms of ADHD.
Unfortunately I'm having trouble getting the bank to approve a loan for concentration camps.
My girlfriend of two years just left me.
Turns out the police didn't exactly approve of our relationship.
I don't approve of the homosexual lifestyle...
but $50 is $50.
I don't approve of political jokes
They keep on getting elected.
When it comes to Russian Roulette ..
.. 5/6 approve
John and Jane go to see a marriage counsellor.
The counsellor says, "So, you two are married, correct?"
"Correct," they reply.
"And you are having regular s**...?" asks the counsellor.
"Absolutely," they reply,
"So," laughs the counsellor, "What is the problem?"
They say, "Well, our partners don't really approve."
Gimme a White Russian, Hold The Russian.
At an all-you-can-eat buffet, my nine-year-old was excited to find a chocolate milk machine. But her aunt did not approve. Chocolate milk for dinner? she asked.
It's delicious! said my daughter.
Her aunt shrugged. Well, its 8 a.m. somewhere.
Why don't Baptists approve of premarital s**...?
Because it might lead to dancing.
My grandmother didn't approve of me working at the nudist tennis club.
But you should have seen her face when I told her I'd been promoted from ball boy to head of staff.
Why the pope does not approve of continuous functions?
Because it is not holy.
I finally met my pen pal who had recently got out of prison.
My parents didn't approve of him, but that was because they had no context.
Why did h**... approve of his mathematicians?
They were all ~z-s.
I don't approve of the relationship between the Eurasian and Indian Plates...
Both of them are in it just to get Himalaid.
I provoked my therapist but she didn't seem to approve.
I can't help it though, she just makes me feel a tease.
Two dudes were m**... in my living room.
I told them to beat it but they didn't leave! They even thanked me for my approval! I don't approve and I'm appalled and offended.
Why did got object to the wedding between the catholic man and the catholic woman?
He doesn't approve of same sect marriage
Delicious goat.
Mom and Dad invited Aunt Edna over for dinner. Mom was cooking while Dad set the table, and Aunt Edna asked Timmy what they were having for dinner.
"Fish," said Timmy.
"Hmf," said Aunt Edna. "I don't approve of foods that have spent their previous lives immersed in salt. Are you quite sure?"
"Yep." Timmy shrugged. "Dad said to Mom, 'Today is just as good as any to have the old trout for dinner.'"
