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Application Jokes

77 application jokes and hilarious application puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about application that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Calling all jobseekers and college hopefuls seeking a laugh! Get your daily giggles with these hilarious application jokes and anecdotes! From mobile application jokes to leave application gags and everything in between, there's something for everyone. See how your application support and application security knowledge stacks up with our assessment and petition jokes. Get ready to laugh!

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Popular Application Short Jokes

Short application jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The application humour may include short applicant jokes also.

  1. a guy got an interview for a job with EA Boss: the second part of your resume is missing
    Applicant: for the second part you have to pay 20$
    Boss: welcome on board
  2. Interviewer: Can you explain these 4 jobless years in your resume? Applicant: That's when I went to Yale. Interviewer: Impressive! You are hired!
    Applicant: Thanks, I really need this yob.
  3. Interviewer: Is the glass half empty or half full? Applicant: It's completely full.
    Interviewer: We'd be glad to hire you. Welcome to the Lays factory.
  4. Interview Employer: This is an important job, we need someone who is responsible.
    Applicant: I'm the one you want!
    At my last job, every time there was a problem, they said I was responsible.
  5. Whenever I have to hire people I throw half of the applications in the trash can I don't want to hire any unlucky people
  6. If you ever have to go through job applications, throw half of them away randomly You don't want to hire anyone unlucky
  7. Yo Mama is so ugly, that when she entered a haunted house, she came out with an application.
  8. I was thrown out of school because my boyfriend filled out my application. They said I didn't apply myself
  9. Fill out job applications in crayon... ...and if you don't get hired, just blame it on your color.
  10. Employer: "In this job we need someone who is responsible." Applicant: "I'm the one you want.
    On my last job,
    every time anything went wrong,
    they said I was responsible."

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Application One Liners

Which application one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with application? I can suggest the ones about apps and apply.

  1. Your momma so ugly… She went into a haunted house and came out with a job application
  2. Finland has just joined NATO. It's good to know their application is Finnish.
  3. How do you starve a BLM member? Hide their welfare check under a job application.
  4. I wanted to hire a marsupial butler... but none of the applicants were koala-fied.
  5. Harvard University accepted my application! I'm going to be their best janitor!
  6. What did the insurance company say to the applicant? THIS ISN'T EVEN MY FINAL FORM!
  7. Some people love abbreviations, such as: "n/a". But that's not applicable to me.
  8. What do you call a software wizard that installs applications? The Wizard of OS
  9. Police hunting a man for indecent assault. Applications close next week.
  10. What do you do in 5 minutes that you then suffer for for 9 months? A school application.
  11. Yo mama's so ugly She went to a haunted house and came out with a job application
  12. My math teacher Staples Burger King applications on failed tests.
  13. My cross fit application was was rejected Bad form
  14. What's a Lion's favourite application? RAR
  15. I was 30min late for an interview today Thank god the applicant is still there

Job Application Jokes

Here is a list of funny job application jokes and even better job application puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Did you hear about our scarecrow's latest job application? He was out-standing in his field!
  • I am Responsible Employer : We need someone for this Job, who is Responsible.
    Applicant : Sir, your search ends here, in my previous job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I am Responsible..
  • The Ferguson riots were really unsettling guys. I heard today that the only way they could disperse the crowd is by handing out job applications.
  • At a job interview: The HR manager: What would you say is your biggest weakness?
    Applicant: I never know when to quit.
    Manager: That seems ok, you're hired.
    Applicant: I quit!
  • At a job interview: Interviewer: What are some of your weaknesses?
    Applicant: I'm lazy
    I: that's it?
    A: I'm lazy to list them all...
  • My job application for the scissors company was declined after the hands-on interview I just didn't make the cut.
  • I just submitted my application to be on the next season of Survivor... Which apparently was not the answer my dad was looking for when he asked "How is the job search going?"
  • Have you heard about Trumps revision of Obama phones? You'll be able to trade them in for a alarm clock and job application.
  • your mama is so ugly, when she went in a haunted house, she came out with a job application
  • The daycare turned down my job application. Probably because I described myself as "a touchy-feely kind of guy"

College Application Jokes

Here is a list of funny college application jokes and even better college application puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Sherlock and Watson are filling in their college application. Watson: Sherlock? Why have you skipped writing this essay?
    Sherlock: It's supplementary my dear Watson
  • Why don't SJWs go to college? Because you have to put Male or Female on the college application

Application Support Jokes

Here is a list of funny application support jokes and even better application support puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My celebrity status application was denied Because I marked "no" in the section saying "I support clobbering women"
Application joke, My celebrity status application was denied

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about application can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of application puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Unearthly Funniest Application Jokes to Tickle Your Sides

What funny jokes about application you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean app for jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make application prank.

A monastery's bell ringer died and the monks put an ad in the paper for a new one.

The next day a man comes to the door to apply and he has no arms. The head monk says:
"Sir, how can you ring our bell if you have no arms?"
The applicant replied, "Just give me a chance, take me to the bell tower and I'll show you."
The all get to the bell tower and ask him to show them how he plans to do it. The applicant gets a running start and slams his face into the bell "RINNNNNNGGGGGGGG"
Before anyone could stop him, he backs up and runs s**... into the bell again and falls to the ground dead.
The head monk spoke up, "Did anyone catch his name?"
Another monk said, "No, but his face sure rings a bell."

Math in the real world

Basic Math is the subject I teach at a small community college in western North Carolina. I call one part of the curriculum Practical Applications for Living in the Real World. The day after I presented a lesson on simple and compound interest, one of my older students approached me in the hallway. "You really taught me a great deal about my life yesterday," he said. "I realized I've been struggling with a lack of interest, compounded daily, for thirty years."

A man goes in for a job application...

...and the interviewer asks, "What would you consider to be your main strengths and weaknesses?"
"Well," he began, "my main weakness would definitely be my issues with reality-telling what's real from what's not."
"Okay," said the interviewer, "and what about your strengths?"
"I'm Batman"

Clever guy applying for a job, ended up talking about the wages...

Manager: '' So you will start at $15 a hour and later you could earn at least $20 a hour. ''
Applicant: ''Alright then I'll be back later! ''

A CEO, his American employee, and an immigrant applicant are sitting at a table with a box of 20 cookies...

A CEO, his American employee, and an immigrant applicant are sitting at a table with a box of 20 cookies.
The CEO takes 19 cookies, then whispers to the American employee, "Watch out, I think that Mexican is going to try and take your cookie!"

Husband Wanted

A lonely widow, age 70, decided that it was time to get married again.

She put an ad in the local paper that read:

HUSBAND WANTED:
MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70s),
MUST NOT BEAT ME,
MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME,
MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!!!!!
ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON.

On the second day, she heard the doorbell.
Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a grey-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair.
He had no arms or legs.
The old woman said, 'You're not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you ... you have no legs!
The old man smiled, 'Therefore, I cannot run around on you!'
She snorted. 'You don't have any arms either!'
Again, the old man smiled, 'Therefore, I can never beat you!'
She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, 'Are you still good in bed???'
The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said,
'Rang the doorbell, didn't I?'

How do you think bus driver interviews go?

Applicant: Sorry I'm late!
Interviewer: You're hired!

I always wondered what the job application is like at h**....

Do they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"

Interviewer: Name one of your accomplishments

Applicant:Well I discovered aliens, outside my house and managed to learn their language.
Interviewer:That seems rather complicated...
Applicant:Well Spanish isn't hard to learn sir.

The HR takes the top 20 application folders from the pile and throw it in the trash.

Those people have bad luck. We don't want people with bad luck.

Why can't Chuck Norris complete forms and applications on the internet?

Because he can't bring himself to click the "submit" button.

A guy was nailing his interview and the employer said "well application looks great but there's a 7 year gap since your last job, what happened?"

The guy says "oh I went to yale",
The employer: Oh great your hired you start Monday.
Guy: "Yay I got a yob!"

Another interview joke

During a job interview, the interviewer asks, I noticed a 6 year gap in your resume. How do you account for this period of time?
The applicant responds, I went to Yale.
Excited, the interviewer says, Yale?!? You're hired!
The applicant replies, Yay! I got a yob!

Today's Horoscope:

"You are easily influenced by what you read and have the ability to make vague sentences somehow applicable to your own existence."

A nun was fired from her job in heaven...

A nun was fired from her job in heaven, so she came down to earth and started looking for a job. One night, when she is filling out a job application, there is a question that asks her to check the boxes next to the jobs that she has previously worked at. She looks at the answers for a second, and then checks the box marked, "Nun of the above."

Ben was a fifth grader notorious for his lack of filter.

One day, he walked into class 10 minutes late. "What took you so long, Ben?" asked the teacher. "Sorry miss, there was construction happening in a w**... nearby so all the roads were blocked."
Suddenly, all the girls in the class, disgusted at Ben, rose up to protest against his v**... rhetoric. "Simmer down, you s**...", Ben replied "they are not taking applications yet."

The Job Interview

Three equally qualified applicants apply for a job. The interviewer decides to test their powers of observation.
He asks all three of them the same question. Look at me closely and tell me what you notice.
Applicant 1: If you don't mind me saying, one of your ears is higher than the other.
Well done!
Applicant 2: Are your ears uneven?
Yes, well done!
Applicant 3: Are you wearing contact lenses?
How'd you know that?
Well, you'd never wear glasses with ears like that.

Interviewer: Do you have any question about the job that you are applying for?

Applicant: How much is the salary?
Interviewer: Initially $40,000. Later it could go up to $80,000
Applicant: I will start later then.

A manager examined a job application, then turned to the applicant and said, "For a man with no experience, you are certainly asking for a high salary."

*"Well, the work is much harder when you don't know what you are doing."*

Greatest Strength

Interviewer: What would you say is your greatest strength?
Applicant: Yes.
Interviewer: What?
Applicant: Sorry, I thought you asked if I was listening.

Reality vs LinkedIn

Reality:
I got my driving license
Linkedin:
I am honored and thrilled to announce that I have been selected among the top 5 applicants who participated in professional and the most-respected exam which evaluates the skills and ability to operate fuel-based vehicles. I cannot wait to see what the next chapter holds, and I cannot express my appreciation to the ministry of transportation, Wendy's, Google, NASA, my neighbors who supported me during this difficult journey.

I applied to the police academy

The academy head approached me "I am afraid I have to decline your application".
"What's the problem?"
"Your family history. Specifically your mother and father."
"My parents are happily married."
"That's the problem. All cops are b**...."

Dear sir, On behalf of Channel Four may I thank you for your application submitted on behalf of your wife for our new reality show.

Also the charming photograph you enclosed. Whilst agreeing that she could make a worthy contribution to the program if selected, I would point out that the correct title of the series is actually "Fact Hunt". Kind regards Channel Four.

I just emailed off my application for d**... Club.

They replied almost straight away, thanking me for my submission.

I tried to join a local butter of the month club here in our small rural community, but for some reason, they rejected my application.

I'll tell you, I've never felt so margarin-lized in my life!

Mother decided that 10-year-old Cathy should get something 'practical' for her birthday.

Suppose we open a savings account for you?" mother suggested. Cathy was delighted.
"It's your account, darling," mother said as they arrived at the bank, "so you fill out the application."
Cathy was doing fine until she came to the space for "Name of your former bank."
After a slight hesitation, she put down: "Piggy."

During an interview the potential employer asked the young man What you consider to be your greatest weakness"?

The job applicant replied Honesty.
The interviewer commented "Honesty? I don't think honesty is a weakness.
The young man replied I don't care what you think!

The recruiter was shocked to see the applicant was a spider. Wait, what position are you applying for?

A web designer, the spider replied

The new Russian AI application

ChatKGB - it's asking all the questions, and you are obligated to answer them

A guy applies for a job and gets called in for an interview.

The interviewer says, I see on your application that you left your last job due to illness. What kind of illness was it?
He replies: They didn't say; they just said they were sick of me!

Application joke, Yo Mama is so ugly, that when she entered a haunted house,

jokes about application

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these application jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.